💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abuser, child doser, dog killer. "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse Redditor streamer. Swinger "whitebread ass nigga" who snuffs animals and visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold. Still not over his ex Aaron. Wife's bod worth $50.

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Luna's expiration date is?

  • <1 year

    Votes: 157 22.5%
  • Around 2 years

    Votes: 277 39.7%
  • 3-5 years

    Votes: 94 13.5%
  • As long as a pug lives, Karen farmer.

    Votes: 170 24.4%

  • Total voters
    698
If the Rekeita kids ever do find this thread, I hope they can understand that none of this was their responsibility to manage. That they should have been allowed to remain children. That they should never have been confronted with information about their parents’ sexual activity. That their parents should never have tried to insert April into their family sanctuary. That their father never should have described his children being made wards of the state as “a rough summer.”

But mostly I hope they know it’s not their fault their parents are unrepentant fuckups, and that they are not required to maintain contact with either of them when they come of age.

It's inevitable that one or more of them will find this place at some point. When they're attempting to make sense of the way their trauma was shaped by their childhood and their parents, they're going to go looking for explanations, and Nick's thread here is really the major repository of everything there is to be known about Nick and Kayla.

I imagine that they'll initially be somewhat offended about how all these people were talking smack about their parents while they were at their lowest moment. But they need to remember that this was precisely how their dad used to make his living in the good period, when he would host a show that would dissect the downfall of various lolcows and the legal problems they were having.

Back then, Rekieta saw Kiwifarms as a valuable resource. It was a place that was providing him with content to make a living, And the Farms loved Rekieta. It was only when he started behaving like a lolcow that the relationship changed.

Rather than seeing this place as antagonistic towards them, they should regard it as a place that's documented the behaviour of their parents. Yes, there's a lot of joking and poking fun at them -- it's the nature of the place, we post here to amuse ourselves. But your parents are going to gaslight you as you get older. Insist that certain things that you remember never actually happened. Fortunately, it's all documented right here. What you choose to make of that and how you choose to use it is a matter for yourself, but if you need the truth, you'll find it in here.
 
I'm not so sure. His weird cooking cope streams always were pretty late.
I wouldn’t be surprised if as a family they ate later out of sheer laziness. Or they microwave some slop for the kids and make a different, better meal at night for themselves. Nick thinks because he’s in a higher tax bracket the dysfunction in his family is actually cool and fine. Same shit happens in homes struggling with poverty.
 
The whole family should feel angry, ashamed and outraged for a very long time. Not at the thread, but at their creepy drunken faggot of a son, husband and father
 
I am actually shocked at the number of people here who think Bob and Kayla wrote those shit letters.

To be clear, I don't think any of the opinions I am seeing here about them are wrong, per se, but if Nick didn't flat out ghostwrite them over their signatures, he definitely had "significant input." They ooze with his classic narcicism. Reading those two letters felt like watching a hostage tape.

I can totally imagine him over his wife's shoulder as he writes "hers":

Nick: "Okay, now talk about how awesome I am for driving the kids everywhere, and how I fight for truth, justice, and the American way. Then mention that Aaron ate my goo."
Kayla: "I am NOT mentioning Aaron's goo in a letter to the court!"
Nick "Fine! But at least mention how I'm an excellent cook!"
:really:
 
Just to underscore how tight this community is, I went searching for what type of community service jobs Nick might be required to do. I didn't find much specific information (these jobs seem to be outsourced to staffing companies), however there is an overview of how corrections works in the county. It's somewhat interesting for nerds. Link.

This stuck out to me:
View attachment 7234786View attachment 7234785
Officer Jim FELT!!!
But he retired in 2024.
 
I know Nick himself has more or less said that he was "always" a degenerate (and his college life seems a little sketchy); at the same time when I re-listen to some of the stuff he said in the past (interview in The Dick Show, 2019), his voice sounds noticeably different, sounds genuine, and most importantly--I don't think he's a good enough liar to keep that suppressed for that long
He permanently gave himself a fucked up stuffy nose from cocaine use and a (potentially permanent) fucked up voice from Galaxy Gas so his voice is doubly fucked.

His fucked up drug brain probably doesn't help.
 
The Prosecution gets to respond. Will they? Balldo has had an easy ride thus far, I'm thinking it's going to continue. I just don't see that 30 days jail, 3-5 years probation and 80 hours community service materialising.

I'd bet on 21 months probation and that be it. I just imagine this was all sown up in the settlement conference. Unless the Judge reads something alarming in the report, this, I think, is a slap on the wrist coming. I'd genuinely love to be wrong.
 
The driving thing being constantly brought up as some Herculean feat is so infuriating. It's America, everyone who doesn't live in shithole cities has to drive hours everywhere for everything.

What's crazy to me, is why Nick, if driving was such a barrier to him living a normal life didn't just move fucking home. The value on the two houses he owned and Daddy's oil money could have easily bought a nice place in the suburbs. You can't bitch about how remote the place you live is when you also actively refuse to move, especially when you are lucky enough to be in the 1% who can afford to relocate.

Honestly though. I think Kayla needs to be given far, far more shit than Nick. Nick at least had a job or was going through education whilst parenting. Kayla does not and has not ever had a job. She is a literal NEET, why is she incapable of picking up laundry, driving kids to appointments or even cooking dinner. I don't think the man of the house should do nothing round the house like it's the 1950s but from every account of that household, Kayla is useless dead weight, whilst Nick can (and frequently does) at least take credit for one thing.
 
The Prosecution gets to respond. Will they? Balldo has had an easy ride thus far, I'm thinking it's going to continue. I just don't see that 30 days jail, 3-5 years probation and 80 hours community service materialising.

I'd bet on 21 months probation and that be it. I just imagine this was all sown up in the settlement conference. Unless the Judge reads something alarming in the report, this, I think, is a slap on the wrist coming. I'd genuinely love to be wrong.
I have the feeling that the prosecution is probably offering 0 days, 2 years probation, and no community service because a win is a win to them. It will, however, be interesting to see if the judge lets Nick off without paying some sort of penance.
 
The Prosecution gets to respond. Will they? Balldo has had an easy ride thus far, I'm thinking it's going to continue. I just don't see that 30 days jail, 3-5 years probation and 80 hours community service materialising.

I'd bet on 21 months probation and that be it. I just imagine this was all sown up in the settlement conference. Unless the Judge reads something alarming in the report, this, I think, is a slap on the wrist coming. I'd genuinely love to be wrong.
Didn't the new judge had a reputation to be hard on drugs? There is a slim chance he will get court raped.
 
Honestly though. I think Kayla needs to be given far, far more shit than Nick. Nick at least had a job or was going through education whilst parenting. Kayla does not and has not ever had a job. She is a literal NEET, why is she incapable of picking up laundry, driving kids to appointments or even cooking dinner. I don't think the man of the house should do nothing round the house like it's the 1950s but from every account of that household, Kayla is useless dead weight, whilst Nick can (and frequently does) at least take credit for one thing.
I strongly doubt Nick wanted or would allow her to work. He seemed to want her under lock and key Jane Eyre style. I suspect it was both to be controlling and to portray the 'trad' image. In any case Nick's job is tantamount to what teens who stream Minecraft do. To reiterate, his 'job' is a hobby many do basically for free or minimal pay. Both adults in that house were relying on the trust fund gibs to pay the bills, all the streaming money went to totalled Mustangs and flamethrower robot dogs and shitty paintings.
 
>TIC-TOC-TIC-TOC!
>20 HOURS CUCK POPE!
>TIC-TOC-TIC-TOC!
>NO JAIL, BUT YOU SHOULD FETCH THE ROPE!
>TIC-TOC-TIC-TOC!
>THE ANOTHER CUCK AND DUMDUM WON!
>TIC-TOC-TIC-TOC!
>ANIMESUCKS COPE...
>ANIMECOPE...

>COPE...

Racketsprayer.webp
 
What's crazy to me, is why Nick, if driving was such a barrier to him living a normal life didn't just move fucking home. The value on the two houses he owned and Daddy's oil money could have easily bought a nice place in the suburbs. You can't bitch about how remote the place you live is when you also actively refuse to move, especially when you are lucky enough to be in the 1% who can afford to relocate.

The truth is that there is nothing "remote" about the place where Nick lives. He is like 15 minutes outside of the city of Willmar (the biggest city in the area). He is basically in a suburb. Anything he has to drive his kids to in that area, is going to be really close and there will be next to no traffic. Its all easy stuff.

The only things Nick is far away from are :

1) His favorite gay bar "Gay90s" in Minneapolis.
2) Buying drugs from black fellas on the street down in da hood.

What does location matter anyway? 90% of what Nick does is stay inside his house drinking or getting high. He doesn't do anything. He doesn't go anywhere. He has no hobbies.

He complains about driving in part because its likely the only thing he ever does. Its the only thing between him and his dream of just zombie-ing out on Ketamine for days on end.
 
I am actually shocked at the number of people here who think Bob and Kayla wrote those shit letters.

To be clear, I don't think any of the opinions I am seeing here about them are wrong, per se, but if Nick didn't flat out ghostwrite them over their signatures, he definitely had "significant input." They ooze with his classic narcicism. Reading those two letters felt like watching a hostage tape.

I can totally imagine him over his wife's shoulder as he writes "hers":

Nick: "Okay, now talk about how awesome I am for driving the kids everywhere, and how I fight for truth, justice, and the American way. Then mention that Aaron ate my goo."
Kayla: "I am NOT mentioning Aaron's goo in a letter to the court!"
Nick "Fine! But at least mention how I'm an excellent cook!"
:really:
I figured that we were all in an unspoken agreement that Nick at least had "creative input" over what they wrote.
 
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