💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abuser, child doser, dog killer. "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse Redditor streamer. Swinger "whitebread ass nigga" who snuffs animals and visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold. Still not over his ex Aaron. Wife's bod worth $50.

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Luna's expiration date is?

  • <1 year

    Votes: 157 22.5%
  • Around 2 years

    Votes: 277 39.7%
  • 3-5 years

    Votes: 94 13.5%
  • As long as a pug lives, Karen farmer.

    Votes: 169 24.2%

  • Total voters
    697
Apparently, Rekieta is capable of encouraging his audience to donate over a million dollars to charity, but he can't encourage a single one of them to write a letter of support.
So Eric July is a fan of yours now, huh, Skelly?
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:really:
 
Why do they make themselves look even more total fuckups... Like they aren't even connected to reality at all. 17 year old that can't cook... Complaining about driving... School... Well holidays are coming in a few months.

Community service and and say 2-3 year probation would be great. The jail would truly be cherry on the top.
 
Kayla refers to "a mistake"
I know my husband made a mistake and broke the law, but it was just that, a mistake.
I know that she's just going through the motions, and saying what she thinks she has to say, and that she might not have even written this herself, and blah blah blah...
Like we're just supposed to put up with her saying this shit.

Kayla—you dumb, pill-headed nigger; you contemptible failure of a mother; you lifeless, vacuous lump; you whore—Nick didn't just trip and fall face-first into a cocaine trap that had been set for him by Wile E. Coyote.

Over the course of at least a year, if not longer, Nick regularly drove to the Twin Cities to buy drugs. He then used those drugs, and acted under the influence of those drugs, and bragged about how cool he thought it was to any of his friends who would listen. And he did all of this with you, in the house where your children live.
This was repeated, and continuous, and deliberate, done with appalling disregard for everyone around him—especially the children who depended on him.
It was not an accident.
It was not a mistake.
Shut the fuck up.
 
Also Kayla. It was also your coke. And your ketamine was it... You both made a mistake. You just got it away because you live in sexist soft on woman place.

Ofc, you can not say we made a mistake. As that would admit guilt... But still... You both fucked up. Especially you. You should have thrown out the coke and told Nick that he will be out of the house if he ever brings more. But you didn't?
 
He’s not going to jail unless he violates probation
I am certain that he will violate his probation.
Assuming that he actually gets monitored / tested well enough to catch him, he's as good as jailed.

nick's toast
This deserved more. 10/10 pun.

The fact that all five Rekieta kids are so over-scheduled is a huge red flag.
Maybe.
Part of this could be Nick and Kayla just wanting to give the kids stuff to do to keep the kids out of their hair. Part of this could be from a warped sense of how structured the kids' lives need to be.
But I also think that the kids might be so over-scheduled simply because the Rekietas live in a pretty rural area, and everything in it is so spread-out.

They don't live in a neighborhood where the kids could just walk down the block to play at their friend's house, or ride their bikes down the road to the nearby mall or park. I can't know where their friends live, obviously—but just from looking at the map, in order to actually see their friends (not just talk to them online), they probably have to be driven to some place miles away where an event is going on.

I grew up in a similar rural area with no other kids around, and the only time that I could try to make friends was at school or at hockey practice. The rest of the time, it was pretty lonely.
All of the activities that the Rekieta kids have might be one of the best things that they have going for them right now.
The regular outside contact might be the one thing keeping the kids sane while having to live with their cokehead parents. Getting them out of the house is what let others notice that they were being neglected, after all.

I'm double retarded
Please, you're among friends. We're all retarded.
 
I just don't understand this obsession that seemingly every Rekieta has with how unbearable driving is.

The difficult and time-consuming driving for Nick would have been the long trips back and forth to Minneapolis to buy his cocaine. Those trips were almost certainly far worse than driving the kids around the Wilmar MN area and I think Nick's real complaints about driving are from those trips.
 
Are their lives this easy that this is all they have to worry about?
He chose to live in buttfuck nowhere, yet he constantly whinge and seethe about being car reliant. He whines and cries more about cars than an r/fuckcars poster.

Instead of embracing the local wildlife, he waterboards them and snuffs the lives out of them.
Instead of keeping a nice garden for veggies (like carrots) and fruits, he orders gross doordashed slop.
Instead of keeping some chooks, he tries to domesticate wild cats.

He should just move to Los Angeles to be with his daddy Juju. Then he'll find something else inconsequential to bitch about. He doesn't even have a job, why is he bitching about driving? That's like one my relatives who bitches about having to collect rent from her tenants. Some of them want to pay later, some of them wants shit fixed like nigger you are playing life on easy mode and you're seething about something people wish they had the time to seethe about.

What a fag.
 
He chose to live in buttfuck nowhere, yet he constantly whinge and seethe about being car reliant.
Whenever Nick talks about living in Spicer, Minnesota (complaining about the remoteness, complaining about the people around him, complaining about how cold it is), he usually mentions that he didn't / doesn't actually want to live there, and he blames Kayla for having chosen the location because it was close to her family.
He's all tongue-in-cheek about it when he says it, so he doesn't reeeeeeally resent Kayla for having stuck him up there—except of course he does.

Instead of embracing the local wildlife, he waterboards them and snuffs the lives out of them.
Instead of keeping a nice garden for veggies (like carrots) and fruits, he orders gross doordashed slop.
Instead of keeping some chooks, he tries to domesticate wild cats.
He demonstrates neither a Christian's sense of stewardship, nor a secular man's sense of compassion.
He cares about nothing but himself.
Libertarians Delenda Est.
 
The Barneswalker filing is a window into Nick's soul.

Opposes any community service including a minimal 80 hours. Also claims he gives to charity to the tune of $100k directly and millions indirectly but 80 hours of CS is too burdensome.

I suspect being employed is a PSIR requirement and that is why the slimeball scheduled his return to streaming. He'll check the "complied" box on his probation worksheet at the first superchat. He's only streaming because he told probation that youtube is his job and he doesn't want to have to apply at walmart. He's waited until after sentencing so it counts. Probably one and done.

In addition to community service, best part was recommendation of 30 days in jail and 5 years probation.

I hope he gives the lying liar a choice: 80 hours of community or 30 days in jail just to see what the lazy fuck will do. I'm betting Nick would choose jail but I'd love to see him make that "fuck my kids" choice.

Hopefully judge rubberstamps the PSIR after remembering the retarded Barneswalker Franks filing and discounting everything he says: 5 years probation, 30 days in jail, 80 hours community service with a review in 12 months. And ups the community service to 320 hours.
 
This sentencing recommendation was definitely a pleasant surprise. I think the best funniest outcome would be a combination of community service and a longer probation, say 3-5 years. We all know he can’t go that long without substance abuse. Jail time I can without, I would prefer to play the long game and have him get in further trouble during his probation.

For the lawyers and legal wise people in the this thread, is it possible weens have bugged the prosecution with Nick’s antics and that’s why they’ve recommended a harsher sentence than we expected?
 
He chose to live in buttfuck nowhere, yet he constantly whinge and seethe about being car reliant. He whines and cries more about cars than an r/fuckcars poster.
Worse. He then chose to homeschool as well.
Was it clear how often the Presentencing Committee deviates upward from the guidelines?
Well it's the Judge wuth final say, but upwards is somewhere between 6-10%.

I'd be surprised if he gets the 30 days and I imagine this must have come up in the two settlement conferences and I'm assuming the Judge gave some indication then. The prosecution can also argue for leniency or harsher before sentencing.

From what I could gather it's likely Nick only got the PSI a few days ago. I'm personally expecting more leniency than the PSI recommends and the sentence was likely indicated at the settlement conference. Fingers crossed, though, as so far he has showed zero humility or remorse.
 
The regular outside contact might be the one thing keeping the kids sane while having to live with their cokehead parents.
I’m not saying they should sit their asses at home. But for each of these small children to have multiple music, dance, etc. lessons is fucked up. Especially because they never hear the end of what a hassle the driving is. Kids will feel guilty and simultaneously resent being made to feel that way.
 
This sentencing recommendation was definitely a pleasant surprise. I think the best funniest outcome would be a combination of community service and a longer probation, say 3-5 years. We all know he can’t go that long without substance abuse. Jail time I can without, I would prefer to play the long game and have him get in further trouble during his probation.

For the lawyers and legal wise people in the this thread, is it possible weens have bugged the prosecution with Nick’s antics and that’s why they’ve recommended a harsher sentence than we expected?
100%, though it's all speculation.

Facts we know, and the PSI investigator probably knows plenty of this as well, either through gossip or official letters:
  • The county is tiny; Nick is something of a local celebrity (he was self-conscious about going out in public after the arrest)
  • He publicly defamed Judge Jennifer Fischer (aka "Judge Pussy Liquor")
  • He heavily implied that the cops who searched his home snorted 2-3 g of cocaine that's unaccounted for, and called them fat
  • He accused a county social worker of lying on the stand (CPS case)
  • The man he kicked out of his second home (since sold), and a member of his church, works for the prison system
  • I forget all the insults he hurled at David Schneider (Monty's attorney), but he's a well-respected lawyer in the County
  • He has had about 9 traffic violations in the year preceding his arrest, and has not paid the fines on 4 to the tune of $539.00
  • He has joked about "Brent" who did his drug tests for staring at his penis
  • He has shamed his former church, particularly his well-respected father-in-law, for having a mental breakdown due to his concern about the drugs
The MN Scandinavian prudes have played it by the book, but they're only human. IANAL, but I've learned that subjectivity is part of the process.

The entire MN Statutes on Presentence Investigations is interesting if read closely. This stood out to me.
Screenshot 2025-04-17 at 4.01.36 AM.webp
Several "confidential sources" could have written letters against him. We'll probably never know unless... Nick's recklessness gets the best of him.

Disclaimer: I couldn't find anything on "adjudicated" pre-sentence investigations, particularly. I assume that it's the same process.
 
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Lets talk about PSIs for a moment.

a PSI like this is a big long process which includes interviews, a recommendation like this likely reflects that Nick's risk factors came back very high and a recommendation of jail is pretty significant here because it shows they likely don't feel that Nick has shown that he understands what he did was wrong and why what he did was wrong.
 
This sentencing recommendation was definitely a pleasant surprise. I think the best funniest outcome would be a combination of community service and a longer probation, say 3-5 years. We all know he can’t go that long without substance abuse. Jail time I can without, I would prefer to play the long game and have him get in further trouble during his probation.

For the lawyers and legal wise people in the this thread, is it possible weens have bugged the prosecution with Nick’s antics and that’s why they’ve recommended a harsher sentence than we expected?
It doesn't seem harsh. It is what the sentencing guidelines say actually. He was caught with a lot of cocaine. I think people were assuming it was going to be less and it still might be. The Prosecution has been very retard tolerant so far.

But yes, that PBI was compiled by a probation officer and after meeting and discussing with Nick. They also likely spoke to the rehab people as well. So, if he was an unrepentant prick, yup.
 
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I’m not saying they should sit their asses at home. But for each of these small children to have multiple music, dance, etc. lessons is fucked up. Especially because they never hear the end of what a hassle the driving is. Kids will feel guilty and simultaneously resent being made to feel that way.

And what is the point of doing something like music or dance if the enjoyment of doing those things is gone because of the grief the parent gives you because of their burden.
 
Kids generally don’t want to talk about stuff the way adults wish they would. One near-universal exception is within the context of a car ride. That atmosphere of shared mundanity helps children feel more comfortable opening up and letting parents know what’s really on their hearts.

But with dad fuming at the wheel, muttering under his breath and barely able to stay on the road after downing whiskey all night and having only a short nap before getting behind the wheel, I can imagine how tense and fraught car rides are in that family. Walking on eggshells constantly to avoid setting dad off must be excruciating for those poor kids.
 
Especially because they never hear the end of what a hassle the driving is. Kids will feel guilty and simultaneously resent being made to feel that way.
I felt this in my soul. This is so spot on that it isn’t funny. Thank you for that. I have no doubt that the kids feel, to some degree or another, like a burden. Burdens that Nick and Kayla may have even imposed on them.

They’re expected to do their parents’ emotional labor for them. When your CHILD is expected to monitor you for drug or alcohol abuse in addition to his own struggles, you’ve lost the game of life. Congrats. Slow clap for Nick and Kayla, everyone.

Too bad Megan Fox didn’t add that to her letter. “His kids love him SO MUCH, they’re willing to try to watch over his drug and alcohol use! Aren’t they so close?!”
 
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