Amusing Engrish from Item Listings

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Enjoy a good life at any time
Sleep and rest, Motion, Shopping, Swim
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I'm not sure how "motion" is different from "shopping," but all human activities can fit into one of these four categories.
 
Aunt Carol said:
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Beriberi (?)

This should be someone's fetish, or at least the title of an ASMR video:
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Deep cleansing every inch of your toes
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Click to expand...

Beriberi is a horrible disease caused by a vitamin B1 deficiency. You can become paralyzed, waste away and die. I have no idea what that has to do with cleaning your feet.

And you could probably make a mint on OnlyFans doing weird foot cleaning videos with this thing.
 
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Three-speed intelligent temperature control.
Gravity-free induction automatically shuts off heat preservation after 12 hours of continuous use.
 
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For without you, my life will be empty of all inspiration.
charming​
Love is a force field which attracts, Two solitary my very soul;
And binds them in a state of bliss,
Away from opposing poles.


(The item advertised is an analog watch that clips onto stethoscope tubing.)
 
Aunt Carol said:
View attachment 6516029
For without you, my life will be empty of all inspiration.
charming​
Love is a force field which attracts, Two solitary my very soul;
And binds them in a state of bliss,
Away from opposing poles.


(The item advertised is an analog watch that clips onto stethoscope tubing.)
Click to expand...
Are they trying to imply this is a romantic gift for your doctor boyfriend? Or did they just copy random text that looked good?
 
Coo Coo Bird said:
Are they trying to imply this is a romantic gift for your doctor boyfriend? Or did they just copy random text that looked good?
Click to expand...
This was the only image that had poetry on it; the rest was just models-n-stethoscopes. You'd think it would be easy to copy some random poetry that at least had the word "time" in it.
 
Soft lighting
Light up the night
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(Nothing inaccurate with that statement, but it's not the feature I'd highlight.)
 
Arbitrary tailoring
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Far-infrared palace protection
  • Warm the palace
  • improve
  • Skin beautification
Far-infrared negative oxygen ion printing dot, resonate with the blood of the body's muscles, promote blood microcirculation, protect warm nests, regulate menstruation and nourish blood, and beautify the skin
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Meet your daily use and replacement needs
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(caught me--that's not all that funny, but the picture made me giggle)
 
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Chemistry Infinity
Galaxy Cologne Pour Homme
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Fit for outward rebellion
A boy with a gentle heart
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One spray all day last
Ladies Glancing Back Favour
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This reminds me of when I discovered that Paw Patrol Pups were Jewish...
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The more you play with me the happier I will be
 
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