💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 902 58.0%

  • Total voters
    1,556
To get back to Jack, there’s no way he could have that level of charisma or type of ability to connect with people. Or for that matter be an amazing sport for some playful ribbing or a sarcastic sentence. Guy couldn’t even handle a church event.
Watching Jack interact with people on the McConaughey show was very illuminating. He is so uncomfortable in his own skin and cannot connect with people in a genuine way on any level. I have known many people like this, who try to play the role of “entertainer” in part because they are afraid that if they get real they’ll end up saying something embarrassing or that reveals how fake they are. Lo and behold, when the investors put Jack in a position where he couldn’t play that role, he had a fucking nervous breakdown about what a failure he is.

I wasn’t around the thread at the time that show premiered, but I hope Jack was ridiculed over his complete cluelessness over how to calculate the value of a business. No one calling themselves a CEO should ever live that down.
 
Bourdain was a lolcow in and of himself. He had a marketable schtick of being a celebrity chef who looked down on celebrity chefs for being celebrity chefs, which appealed to the demographic of doomed americans who depended on mainstream television to deliver "counterculture"-branded content to their suckling lips - but I remember immediately clocking this as being a front for a more interesting guy who hated himself and had burnt out his dopamine receptors, who was now using a television persona to hide in plain sight. That's why it's funny to infer that Jack idolized him to any extent, and surely for reasons with no basis in reality.

Does anyone have the clip from (I think) the final season of No Reservations where a little girl at a cookout roasts him for complaining about a TV network paying all his expenses as he travels first class to eat prime rib from the world's most exclusive restaurants? It was a beautiful moment. Edit: @LaughJoke2.0 helpfully reminded me below that it's S06E05 - New York Hudson Valley.

Diabolical.webm
Reminder that he killed himself over a whore, was a sex tourist in Southeast Asia and that Guy Fieri trash-talking him nonstop was a major factor in his final downward spiral.
 
Went to a random point in the video:

Jagoff [About Harris] She is lidurly quoting Marxism's playbook!

Jack also seethed repeatedly about how nobody called or wrote to him to admit he was right that Covid was just a cold and just about EVERYTHING! He gets absolutely incensed if anyone tells him he was wrong or contradicted himself. Even brilliant and educated people recognize and admit they contradicted themselves but with Jack he can't bring himself to admit that it is possible he goofed up. And here is the best part: Later in the stream he admits that he was wrong about saying Michelle Obama would usurp the presidency from Biden. Of course, rather than just admit how retarded his theory was he attempts to act like it was reasonable because Michelle's husband "can be very persuasive" and mentions it was a fumble by the democratic party leadership not to install Michelle Obama as the candidate because had they done so they would have a "fighting chance" in the election.
 
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from what little i paid attention to he seemed like a decent human being

That may be the only point we disagree on:

Even if being a cringing schmuck wasn't the lynchpin of Bourdain's persona (cynically crafted to win over less cynical people, when his blue collar background was probably sufficient to make him relatable), the guy ended up abandoning his child just so he wouldn't have to endure uncomfortable small talk with his own television crew during breakfast at a five-star french hotel:

"Hey, Tony! I hear you paid your girlfriend's blackmail; so the kid she cucked you with wouldn't go to the press! Well, let's head out and get some more b-roll of peasants doing stuff our audience considers quaint or otherwise beneath them for you to narrate over as though it's your job to dignify the lives of earnest people. Hey - Have you noticed how the only way you're willing to do that in your voice overs nowadays is by admonishing capitalism in the context of what's now probably the fourth or fifth network series centered around your jet set lifestyle? Are you gonna eat that cigarette croissant?."

Bourdain decided he would rather be the Hunter Thompson of Food than be himself; Thompson decided he would rather be the Hemingway of Drugs and Counterculture than be himself; Hemingway decided he would rather be the Teddy Roosevelt of Journalism than be himself; and Roosevelt decided he would rather be everything a sickly, asthmatic child was not allowed to pursue.

The crucial difference distinguishing these men is that each, subsequent iteration placed more and more emphasis on the shortcuts they believed "fake it 'til you make it" offered in self-actualization; rather than pursuing any one thing with the degree of earnestness their role model did: Teddy probably did most of the stuff they say he did; Earnest did only some of the stuff he had printed about himself; Hunter couldn't possibly have done some the things he boasted of; and Anthony felt that being a rude brunch cook with piercings and tattoos who got lucky wasn't affording him enough sanctimony (Yes; I know he was the executive chef at a restaurant which subsequently went bankrupt).

In only this singular respect of fraud can Jack Scalfani be considered a successor: He was an obscure radio DJ who decided that filming himself at home surrounded by shit-tier, gimmick kitchen appliances established himself as a celebrity chef in the minds of a nonexistent audience. In this respect, Jack has more in common with Frank Roosevelt; whose strategy for life at one point was to surround himself with bought taxidermied animals while selling himself as some kind of clone of his popular fifth cousin. And, like Jack, the latter part of his public career was centered around pretending that he could still walk.

All but one of the men mentioned died well-regarded (to varying degrees) as a consequence of competently pretending to live up to their own fiction. Jack is such a villain that he livestreams himself bitching that his audience never goes out of their way to tell him how he was right about everything.
 
That stream was so annoying. I lost count of how many times Jimmy and Jack were both speaking at the same time while having two separate conversations. It was also very funny when Jack couldn’t get his AI assistant to answer his questions and raged over it, especially as just yesterday he was saying on FB that he’ll soon be offering lessons on how to develop effective AI prompts.
 
In only this singular respect of fraud can Jack Scalfani be considered a successor: He was an obscure radio DJ who decided that filming himself at home surrounded by shit-tier, gimmick kitchen appliances established himself as a celebrity chef in the minds of a nonexistent audience. In this respect, Jack has more in common with Frank Roosevelt; whose strategy for life at one point was to surround himself with bought taxidermied animals while selling himself as some kind of clone of his popular fifth cousin. And, like Jack, the latter part of his public career was centered around pretending that he could still walk.
Don't forget though, Fatty had MULTIPLE opportunities to actually launch his career and failed at every single one. Bourdain, Thompson, Hemmingway, Roosevelt, all capitalized on the opportunities they stumbled into.

Didn't capitalize on the stupid infomercial he was on with Montel Williams, could have marketed himself to the eldery and wine moms on youtube who might have seen him on TV.

Didn't capitalize on getting selected as a secondary(because the actual winner couldn't attend), and wound up at that Macy's Great American Grilling thing, and couldn't get a boost from that.

Didn't capitalize on being on a TV show about his stupid sauce and youtube channel, then had his head so far up his own ass that even though he was on TV he still couldn't make anything of it after the fact. Then had the audacity to bitch on his blog about being approached by another show.

Didn't capitalize on his brother actually getting his stupid sauce onto some store shelves except trying to copy/paste a script from an as seen on TV commercial on his own youtube channel. Hilariously, he barely showcased his own product like a moron, and rarely bothered to send any samples out(I can only assume because he thought his shit was worth its weight in gold and it would just sell itself even if no one had ever heard of it, based purely on the stupid name).

Didn't capitalize on the burst of resurgence after august the duck, brian tsao, "uncle roger", and others all jumped on the bandwagon of making fun of his stupid ass. He could have put some actual effort into his shit when the hate watchers came around and showed that he either had a personality worth a crap that wasn't shown in the other videos or that he had been making personal improvements, but didn't do any of that.

Didn't capitalize on his supposed sponsorships regarding his therapy glove thing((saebo I think it was?) to show any miniscule amount of recovery and continuing his career showing that he could actually overcome adversity.

Instead all anyone ever saw on his channel was a lying, obese, retard, who can't cook and loved to make an ass out of himself in public with his fat on the go channel.

Considering Fatty pretends to be religious, how does that modern parable of the drowning man go?
Dude stuck on a rooftop in a flood, prays. Rowboat comes by, he says he's waiting on god. Motorboat comes by, says he's waiting on god. Helicopter comes by, says he's waitng on god. Dude asks god wtf he didn't help, and god tells him he sent 2 boats and a helicopter. With Fatty though it's extra hilarious because not only has basically the same shit happened with his career, but it's also happened with his health.

edit: Actually, I just thought of something. Marc, you're referring to Fatty basically idolizing someone(and likely others) who could be considered a fraud in some regard. Right? If you think about this whole thing from a different perspective, Fatty himself while pretending to be a youtube chef is a fraud, he never actually changed his caustic as fuck personality or hid his narcissism. He has I guess managed to at least be consistent with his retarded principles, obviously to a fault.
 
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That stream was so annoying. I lost count of how many times Jimmy and Jack were both speaking at the same time while having two separate conversations. It was also very funny when Jack couldn’t get his AI assistant to answer his questions and raged over it, especially as just yesterday he was saying on FB that he’ll soon be offering lessons on how to develop effective AI prompts.
34:20 Jack was convinced that Richard Nixon was a Democrat (because only DEMONKKKRATS can be corrupt guise!) and the viewers have to wait for a minute as Jack awkwardly fumbles through asking his Siri-knockoff what party President Nixon belonged to. Yet this fat retard considers himself a political genius and labels anyone that dares disagree with him on Boomerbook as an uneducated brainwashed sheep.

37:45 Its so funny to watch AI dunk on Jack as he confidently regurgitates his boomer conspiracy theories he's seen on Facebook about Biden "canceling the election" by starting a war (despite elections being held in 1864 and 1944, during the Civil War and World War 2), leaving him looking dumbfounded, mouth agape like Sleepy Joe during his dementia moment in the debate as he is forced to admit that he has no idea what the fuck he's talking about
 
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34:20 Jack was convinced that Richard Nixon was a Democrat (because only DEMONKKKRATS can be corrupt guise!) and the viewers have to wait for a minute as Jack awkwardly fumbles through asking his Siri-knockoff what party President Nixon belonged to. Yet this fat retard considers himself a political genius and labels anyone that dares disagree with him on Boomerbook as an uneducated brainwashed sheep.

37:45 Its so funny to watch AI dunk on Jack as he confidently regurgitates his boomer conspiracy theories he's seen on Facebook about Biden "canceling the election" by starting a war (despite elections being held in 1864 and 1944, during the Civil War and World War 2), leaving him looking dumbfounded, mouth agape like Sleepy Joe during his dementia moment in the debate as he is forced to admit that he has no idea what the fuck he's talking about
Nixon himself was elected during the Vietnam War hell Eisenhower was elected during Korea.
 
Swung by Jagoff's facebook page and found this

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The most smug and insincere way of offering to pray for people. Anyways, check this shit out:

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Such an incredible failure to show any sort of empathy for this lady given his own struggles for independence. No doubt Jack does not relate because to him if Tammy can wipe his ass and bathe him then it is the same as him being able to do it himself.

You get a feel for how deluded fatty is when this lady switched it up on Jack.

Screenshot 2024-09-01 at 8.33.06 PM.png

Jagoff is still expecting a full recovery and thinks it can happen sometime in his 80s (lol) but would prefer if skydaddy could expedite it :story:
 
34:20 Jack was convinced that Richard Nixon was a Democrat (because only DEMONKKKRATS can be corrupt guise!) and the viewers have to wait for a minute as Jack awkwardly fumbles through asking his Siri-knockoff what party President Nixon belonged to. Yet this fat retard considers himself a political genius and labels anyone that dares disagree with him on Boomerbook as an uneducated brainwashed sheep.

37:45 Its so funny to watch AI dunk on Jack as he confidently regurgitates his boomer conspiracy theories he's seen on Facebook about Biden "canceling the election" by starting a war (despite elections being held in 1864 and 1944, during the Civil War and World War 2), leaving him looking dumbfounded, mouth agape like Sleepy Joe during his dementia moment in the debate as he is forced to admit that he has no idea what the fuck he's talking about
Unfortunately this is pretty common among hardcore Republicans especially those that have bought into the fact that Democrats started off as the party of slavery. Anybody who's studied history can tell you that. But then anybody who's studied history also knows that the Republican party started as a left-wing party.

No. These are people stupid enough to watch a Dinesh D'Souza movie and think it's factual and credible.
 
34:20 Jack was convinced that Richard Nixon was a Democrat (because only DEMONKKKRATS can be corrupt guise!) and the viewers have to wait for a minute as Jack awkwardly fumbles through asking his Siri-knockoff what party President Nixon belonged to. Yet this fat retard considers himself a political genius and labels anyone that dares disagree with him on Boomerbook as an uneducated brainwashed sheep.

37:45 Its so funny to watch AI dunk on Jack as he confidently regurgitates his boomer conspiracy theories he's seen on Facebook about Biden "canceling the election" by starting a war (despite elections being held in 1864 and 1944, during the Civil War and World War 2), leaving him looking dumbfounded, mouth agape like Sleepy Joe during his dementia moment in the debate as he is forced to admit that he has no idea what the fuck he's talking about
are there any other stream highlights
 
are there any other stream highlights
Jack insisted that Hawk Tuah girl’s 15 minutes lasted only five. He wasn’t aware of any of the high-profile interviews or events she’d done. When Jimmy mentioned Bhad Bhabie (not by name, because he’s a retard), Jack said he had no idea who she is because he doesn’t watch Dr. Phil.

They’re just so stupid and ignorant.
 
I would never ask Jack anything or interact with the cow, but as much a fake christian he is, friend of mine just lost her pastor, unexpected, but he was a different denomination. I wonder how Jack would react to that some leeburl jesus fan who didn't hate homosexuals like his younger son or the niggers.

Godbear bless you who do his podcast, I can't even watch his videos anymore, I can't picture removing the hilarious part and being stuck with JUST that fat retard and his comically wrong opinions.
 
I wonder how Jack would react to that some leeburl jesus fan who didn't hate homosexuals
Jack said that this morning’s church service was about sexual orientation. I’m not a Christian and wouldn’t watch a church service even for the lulz, but it’s online and someone else might find it interesting. Every pastor he’s shown us has looked like a mega-fag, so it’s bound to be entertaining.

On a related note, Jack sperging about wokeness is always fun. In the first example, Jack posts that he was looking forward to the film. In the comments on that post, he completely contradicts himself.

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are there any other stream highlights
I just remembered another one: Jack said that ALL of Kamala’s supporters are under 30 years old. Jack’s hate boner for people under the age of 30 is frequently evident in his livestreams.
 
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