💪 Tough Guys Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[AnOminous]

Not because he can't afford buying a nice 4k version (he can't though), but simply because time and time again he's shown us that if given any chance, he'll ALWAYS fuck up whatever he does.

1080p is good enough for most things especially when they don't even have to look really good. I think there's a pretty big dropoff with 1080i. A lot of stuff is fine with 720p if it didn't have much quality to begin with.

To be fair, I do eat snow peas raw, but only out of the garden as they're quite good to snack on while working out there. I don't get why you'd eat them raw if there's other food on your dish and with weird food combinations like that.

I eat them, too, but I like sugar snap peas more. I don't understand much point in posting "I just threw a bunch of random shit on a plate" even if it's mostly reasonably healthy looking stuff.

Tbh it looks better than most of the hog slop he eats.

I think imma stop the faTulpa project now....shits getting a lil uh.....

It's too late. Now you're going to have to make a Jackie Chan tulpa to get rid of it.

 

[Thé au lait]

To everyone confused about "salad": Midwesterners maintain the Shakespeare-era English tradition of calling literally any cold mixed food "salad". "Tuna salad" is canned tuna mixed with mayonnaise and whatever seasonings, and there's a little bit of it visible inside the sandwich plopped on his government cheese.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

I eat them, too, but I like sugar snap peas more. I don't understand much point in posting "I just threw a bunch of random shit on a plate" even if it's mostly reasonably healthy looking stuff.

Sugar snaps are the superior snacking pea. I have more in my greenhouse than winters. The winters are really just there for me to snack on while I work and not binge on sugar snaps. Also found myself randomly taking purple tigers peppers now that they're growing well.

To everyone confused about "salad": Midwesterners call literally everything "salad". "Tuna salad" is canned tuna mixed with mayonnaise and whatever seasonings, and there's a little bit of it visible inside the sandwich plopped on his government cheese.

I've seen a Caesar burger, which is just a homemade Caesar salad dressing mixed in with lettuce and thrown on top a burger patty. Looks delicious so I can't blame them on calling everything a salad.

View attachment 6234538

LOL Patrick is so poor that he thinks Sargento is a gourmet cheese company
Nice Cheddar stupid

https://www.sargento.com/our-cheese/sliced-cheese/#sliced-cheddar

 

[Orange Rhymer]

Area expert on being mocked mistakes compulsive cackling for real humor:
View attachment 6225696

'Comedy Expert'

Fatty could only make a crowd laugh if he tripped and fell on stage.

 

[AprilRains]

View attachment 6234538

Sargento? He's bragging about using fucking Sargento? Isn't he from a cheese-making state?

What the fuck is wrong with this idiot?

 

[Thé au lait]

I've seen a Caesar burger, which is just a homemade Caesar salad dressing mixed in with lettuce and thrown on top a burger patty. Looks delicious so I can't blame them on calling everything a salad.

That sounds weirdly nice, but if you want to make a caeser salad unhealthy I'd recommend wrapping it with a tortilla and either frying it on the stove, or deep-frying it if you're Scottish.
Also I found there's a term called "bound salad", for "salads" like tuna/chicken/potato salad. The more you know!

 

[Divine right to rule]

View attachment 6234538

I would pay a not insignificant amount of money to have Josh and Pat face each other in a battle of the spergs over the topic of american cheese.

 

[Ring of Basilius]

'Comedy Expert'

Fatty could only make a crowd laugh if he tripped and fell on stage.

If he tripped and fell on stage the tri-county area would need to be immediately evacuated. He's very fat, you see.

 

[John_Smith]

I would pay a not insignificant amount of money to have Josh and Pat face each other in a battle of the spergs over the topic of american cheese.

Piggy knows nothing of cheese. His AoE is cured and processed meats. Instead, Piggy would throw Josh to the ground and hold him immobile until the police arrived to arrest him for multiple felonies.

 

[Sneak Deadly Gangster]

Piggy would throw Josh to the ground and hold him immobile

 

[AutoClownMaker]

Piggy, we are not deceived. You did not bake that bread. You bought it at the local piggly wiggly.

In Milwaukee proper, not really.

The closest big store would be 5-7 blocksish away Whole Foods. Whole foods has a beer bar and a place to drink and overlooks Hoolgans. This makes Whole Foods the logical choice. Pick N Save, now Krogers would be the next closest. They would be the safest what with the off duty MPD officers who act as security for anyone BUT Patrick.
https://untappd.com/v/whole-foods-market-milwaukee/34649 but no pictures of Hoolies from their seating.


For local bread there would be the Italian market on Brady and then Peter Sortinos. Peter's would have that style VS the Italian place.

Edit - Glorisio's is the Italian market. Badly spelled like Sortinos.

Sargento? He's bragging about using fucking Sargento? Isn't he from a cheese-making state?

What the fuck is wrong with this idiot?

He can't be bothered to go to the spanish speaking part of Milwaukee and get his cheese from Clock Tower Creamery.

Or he made it to that part of town and got drunk at the 1st distillery in WI after prohibition Great Lakes Distillery and drank from the green 55 metal gallon drums of ethyl alcohol they have so couldn't get to the sensory depravation tanks, Jake's cheesestakes, purple door ice cream and clock tower creamery because he was too drunk. (to be fair the cheesestake place is now closed and the tanks may be gone but they were a thing in town at one point)

Conhito's banned him for over eating the free chips ya get with your food so that really turned him off of that part of town. No doubt Acapulco's closed because he ate them of business.

 

[Something Awful]

Stumbled upon this old tweet:



I always thought the "gay sauna at the gym" thing was (mostly) just taking the piss, but it's true. Patrick's gym was full of gays. LMAO.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Stumbled upon this old tweet:

View attachment 6235248

I always thought the "gay sauna at the gym" thing was (mostly) just taking the piss, but it's true. Patrick's gym was full of gays. LMAO.

View attachment 6235249

All I can think of is the lyric from that literal music video: The gayest man on earth would call this over the top.

Also ten fucking years and those tweets could have been from today. Fats never changes.

 

[Brawl in Montreal]

Pat the chef is back
View attachment 6233562
View attachment 6233564

The biggest sin in this photo was not the unmelted cheese or burnt bread, but leaving the leaves on his strawbers. F/Pat is fat and I would not eat his wipipo cooking.

 

[This Machine Milks Cows]

There is a new stalker in town and he is really annoying Pat. Pat reveals that his new Tiny Tim in Space novella is not going to be published this year.

I think that he has had this book finished for over a year now, he mentioned that the agent loves it on March 8 this year and was talking of rewrites in January 2023.

Pat appears to have decided to write the book by early December 2021.

So he has already been writing and trying to sell his book for more than two and a half years and it now won't be published until (I would assume Christmas period) 2025 at the very earliest.


This is why your career is already over, fatso. Enjoy poverty.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

There is a new stalker in town and he is really annoying Pat. Pat reveals that his new Tiny Tim in Space novella is not going to be published this year.
View attachment 6236191

I think that he has had this book finished for over a year now, he mentioned that the agent loves it on March 8 this year and was talking of rewrites in January 2023.
View attachment 6236197
Pat appears to have decided to write the book by early December 2021.
View attachment 6236200

So he has already been writing and trying to sell his book for more than two and a half years and it now won't be published until (I would assume Christmas period) 2025 at the very earliest.


This is why your career is already over, fatso. Enjoy poverty.

He's also talked about multiple editors going through it too.
I know of major authors that write a book a year. This guy has taken four to write fanfiction and I bet The Acolyte would be written better than his fanfiction too.

 

[Meriasek]

He's also talked about multiple editors going through it too.
I know of major authors that write a book a year. This guy has taken four to write fanfiction and I bet The Acolyte would be written better than his fanfiction too.

How many of these editors were dyslexic?

I always feel like I could never be an author, but then I see how people like Chuck Wendig and the Man of Pig write, and I'm like... yeah OK, maybe I could. I wrote a short story once that was rejected by a few zines, but I feel like I should keep at it.

 

[Something Awful]

There is a new stalker in town and he is really annoying Pat. Pat reveals that his new Tiny Tim in Space novella is not going to be published this year.

Well, he's right for once. Shitty fanfic of out-of-copyright classics doesn't appear on any publishing schedules, because no one is interested in that shit. You can self-publish it on fanfic-dot-whatever, but you don't need a schedule for that.




Fucking awesome, Rick! Really great you made those changes, Herd Immunity was a classic for the ages!



Fuck yeah! Rick goes to Hollywood!



Bwahahaha. KAPITAN VLADIMIR KOBZAR: Hey be CAREFUL with those MeGaTOn NUkes!!! Lmao. Good fucking writing, pig.



WRONG, turbo child! Wrong, wrong, wrong! There has never been the plain truth! There is only prison!



With so many balls in the air, prolific and acclaimed author Patrick "Man of Pig" Tomlinson seems to have put the highly-anticipated sequel to IN THE BLACK on the backburner, to the chagrin of clamoring fans and despair of publisher #torbooks.



Narrator: It wasn't interesting.



Too bad this one was never published either, it would have been so worth it, I'm sure. We could have gotten more epic writing like this:





Narrator: It wasn't ready for a Christmas 2023 release. Or a Christmas 2024 release. That's not how schedules work, child.



Narrator: Patrick wrote zero books that year.



Right now and forevermore. Patrick is a joke and will never have another book published.



What happened over the course of the last decade to this dapper young homosexual writer, once so full of promise and enthusiasm? We simply don't know. There are whispers of something called "TDS" and rumors of involvement of a mysterious man named Owen Forrems, but the truth is shrouded in fat.



Not an author by any literary standard.

 

[Anonymus Fluhre]

How many of these editors were dyslexic?

I always feel like I could never be an author, but then I see how people like Chuck Wendig and the Man of Pig write, and I'm like... yeah OK, maybe I could. I wrote a short story once that was rejected by a few zines, but I feel like I should keep at it.

I've been told by one of my personal idols (I guess you could call him that, really just one of my inspirations when it comes RPG's and game design) that my idea for a CoC adventure could work, however I didn't like the amount of censorship publishers wanted so I decided to work on everything myself and publish it myself once it's finished. I've already playtested the first book and been finishing up the second which hopefully will be done and playtested by the end of the year. It's a bit slow because of work and school. This time around school is kicking my ass more than getting my BSc in Physics and sadly I can't spend my whole day on X fighting with trolls so that they don't win. You know, fighting that good fight.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Pat sharing his wisdom on the hazards of anger is fucking rich.

Having seen his idea of realistic dialogue for a Russian military leader just makes me REALLY want to read how he anally rapes Dickens’ corpse in the Tiny Tim book. Pat probably has David Copperfield saying shit like “Yo, did you know I used to date a supermodel?”