💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 902 58.0%

  • Total voters
    1,556
So he’s bandwaggoning the Texans this weekend then? I mean since his precious Cowgirls choked as they always do.
Is that literally all that's going on, he's posting Texas pride because the fuckin team is winning? Christ Almighty, Jack is the most surface-level boomer bitch of all time, this is just like the time he tried to pretend Pickle Rick was some wildly genius and subversive content, years after it happened. "If you know, you know!"
 
Is that literally all that's going on, he's posting Texas pride because the fuckin team is winning? Christ Almighty, Jack is the most surface-level boomer bitch of all time, this is just like the time he tried to pretend Pickle Rick was some wildly genius and subversive content, years after it happened. "If you know, you know!"
I believe its actually in reference to the governor of Texas using the Texas National Guard to close certain border crossings and not allowing the federal Border Patrol access to re-open them.

However a much more efficient use of taxpayer dollars would be to deploy Jack to the border and use his corpulent body mass to block illegal immigrants from crossing. Though Border Patrol may get confused and open fire on Jack since he's phenotypically indistinguishable from your average fat old Mexican man
 
I believe its actually in reference to the governor of Texas using the Texas National Guard to close certain border crossings and not allowing the federal Border Patrol access to re-open them.

However a much more efficient use of taxpayer dollars would be to deploy Jack to the border and use his corpulent body mass to block illegal immigrants from crossing. Though Border Patrol may get confused and open fire on Jack since he's phenotypically indistinguishable from your average fat old Mexican man
If Jack didn't think Guatemalans were a type of melon and therefore =/= meat (thanks MOM) the Texans could probably just feed them to the Wendigo.
 
Good point, from what I can tell it's a heroine movie, doesn't that inherently make it "woke"?
Yeah and a lot are saying it's the most woke movie Marvel has put out so far. But I'm thinking Fatty didn't see any of that because it wasn't spelled out for him and they didn't look into the camera and say it directly.

He has the mind of a child and possibly the toilet habits of one which is why he's in a diaper.

Or just start yelling nigger in public all the time like he does at home and get both their asses kicked.
Oh I would pay good money to see that happen in real life. Seeing Fatty and Jr get curb stomped while Hammy and Hammy Jr get spit roasted in front of them? It would be beautiful.

More so because you know Fatty would be begging to suck those dicks for the last time.

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Jackhole liked the new Saw movie because the killings are "justified". As a major glutton-cheat-fraud himself he'd be the perfect victim in one of these.
The first movie in the Saw franchise had a story and it's the only one that really had a psychological edge to it and wasn't just torture porn.

But I'm actually mystified that he not only liked it but that's there's been 10 of these movies. I stopped watching after the third one as it was just getting silly at that point.

However a much more efficient use of taxpayer dollars would be to deploy Jack to the border and use his corpulent body mass to block illegal immigrants from crossing.
He wouldn't be effective at that. All they'd have to do is offer him a birria taco and he'd let them pass.
 
Jackhole liked the new Saw movie because the killings are "justified". As a major glutton-cheat-fraud himself he'd be the perfect victim in one of these.
Jigsaw would give him the choice of eating a salad or MOAR MEAT and immediately having a stroke and turning into a completely paralyzed gibbering idiot without even a working tongue, and he'd do the obvious.
 
Jigsaw would give him the choice of eating a salad or MOAR MEAT and immediately having a stroke and turning into a completely paralyzed gibbering idiot without even a working tongue, and he'd do the obvious.
I think we could come up with someone worse since I think it's his pride more so than gluttony.

Jigsaw would have to have him tell the truth about half of his postings and every minute he delays, vegetables (uncooked, no sauces) would be gavage fed style into his mouth.
 
And of fucking course Jack is a bad tipper. What does the tip matter when you just write every food purchase off as a business expense anyway?
Most people will at least tip well when they know they're being watched, like on a date. He just does not give a shit.
 
Jigsaw would give him the choice of eating a salad or MOAR MEAT and immediately having a stroke and turning into a completely paralyzed gibbering idiot without even a working tongue, and he'd do the obvious.
Actually his trap would be much simpler.

Jigsaw puts him in a room with all his favorite foods like pulpork, birria tacos and warm marinara sauce and says all he needs to do in order to go free is not eat any of the food. If he can survive an hour in there without touching any of the bounty he's free to go. Fatty wouldn't last 30 seconds before he's face deep in it like a pig eating slop from a trough.
 
Is that literally all that's going on, he's posting Texas pride because the fuckin team is winning? Christ Almighty, Jack is the most surface-level boomer bitch of all time, this is just like the time he tried to pretend Pickle Rick was some wildly genius and subversive content, years after it happened. "If you know, you know!"
There are few things more retarded and cringeworthy IMO than posting state pride stuff for a state you don't live in.

AFAIK, Jack has no ties to Texas other than being buck broken on WTIC.
 
Why did he need Tammy's help to make this video? Do you guys think Jack can stand from a seated position? I think walking even short distances is out of the question. I think someone has to help him prop up against the counter and then help him get back in the mobility scooter once he stops filming.
 
Why did he need Tammy's help to make this video? Do you guys think Jack can stand from a seated position? I think walking even short distances is out of the question. I think someone has to help him prop up against the counter and then help him get back in the mobility scooter once he stops filming.
All he can do is bitch and whinge😂
 
Actually his trap would be much simpler.

Jigsaw puts him in a room with all his favorite foods like pulpork, birria tacos and warm marinara sauce and says all he needs to do in order to go free is not eat any of the food. If he can survive an hour in there without touching any of the bounty he's free to go. Fatty wouldn't last 30 seconds before he's face deep in it like a pig eating slop from a trough.
It can be even simpler, he has to eat all vegan food and vegetables, only super healthy stuff.
 
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Bitch boy is seething in The Jack Pack group because none of his posts in there gets any hits.
 
Roger Ebert, eat your heart out (well, if you actually could eat anything with that jaw of yours, but I digress...)
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Tammy must have said she liked the The Marvels for Jack to say that. It's a typical "grrl power" movie where none of the lead characters are really that interesting, prefect fodder for a man like Jack to scream into the void about. Like the first Black Panther movie, it almost touches on an interesting subject for superhero movies(should a leader of an enlightened society really be crowned based on whoever wins a deathmatch/should a superhero be forgiven for causing a genocide even if her actions could be justified in the beginning) but the second half of both movies devolved into the typical superhero "whoever can punch the hardest wins the argument" stuff. Since Jack himself said he can barely hear and see anything anymore, I think his ratings are based on how many times he choked on the popcorn in the theatre.
 
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