💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Fortnite Bear]

I think Jack is starting to recognize that he has trolls more than ever. He says that he doesn't see comments, but that's full of shit when you keep replying to them.

Jack is "totally disabled" but is working constantly.

So he finally admitted it. If I'm not wrong, this is the first time he was willing to admit that he is disabled. Usually he tries to hide the fact that his hand doesn't work or that his legs are shot

Lots of angy sperging about football.

Jack is coping about how the Cowboys are still gud after losing 42-10 on Sunday lmao. "They just need a gud quarterback"
Jack is still not over the KC vs Jets game where Patrick Mahomes ran down the clock instead of scoring another touchdown. Definitely not because KC wanted to prevent the Jets from having the ball in a close game.

Jack continues to be a shining example of why Facebook keeps pumping out conspiracy-embracing retards.

 

[Mundane Ralph]

He doesn't drink... but they want to brew some beer. What's he going to do? Give it to the homeless?

They drink, they just pretend not to. Jack was going through bottles of gentleman Jack pretty quickly earlier this year and whenever he cooks with wine he'll get a big 1.5l bottle when he only needs a half cup.

 

[That Damned Tiger]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=IzzKSJ0WDUgMainly just him whining about prices again.

Jack is pissy and gave the restaurant a C+ rather than admit he may have been wrong about birria/quessabirria. That's my theory. No birria dipping sauce? Fail.

I don't expect Jackoff to google beaner language prior to making a video centered around Mexican food but the restaurant is CALLE as in the Spanish word for street, not CALLIE as in the name. He wonders if the name is in reference to California which is stupid but more critical thought than I would have guessed his stroke brain can muster.

Something else I caught, he complained about the building still having the old $4 taco restaurant's artwork on it. The logo said "Mexican cocina" (kitchen), he read it aloud and pronounced it "cochina" which is slang for a female filthy pig. It's something you would use to describe a dirty whore or uncouth woman who burps and farts in a restaurant, for example. The more you know.

Of course Jack's gonna mispronounce CALLE as CALLIE. He's too much of a retard to not have picked up anything Spanish when he lived in Buena Park. And 'cochina'? I'm pretty sure that's Tammy's nickname.

 

[Polska krowa]

They drink, they just pretend not to. Jack was going through bottles of gentleman Jack pretty quickly earlier this year and whenever he cooks with wine he'll get a big 1.5l bottle when he only needs a half cup.

Jack's choice in alcohol show that he's either (1) Not a drinker, or (2) a full-blown alcoholic. Have a look at the wine he buys, it's always the nastiest shit. For the duration of his cooking show he's almost exclusively bought Yellow Tail, presumably because Australian wine was in vogue at the turn of the century and because it's Jack, that means it's not only good, but it's still good, because, you know, wine doesn't vary from year to year or over prolonged periods. I'd imagine the Gentleman Jack is being quaffed by Gentleman Jack Jr.

I really think he's probably telling the truth about not drinking, he looks like hot shit and sick, but he doesn't look like a drinker

 

[rubytintedchix]

He claims to be producing for three new "artists".

• "The Ellis Way" - She's "not as polished as Paula Deen" - He'll share the video later tonight. He keeps having to look up the name of the channel throughout the stream.

Here is her channel:

Here is her channel’s art work, I think we all know who designed this:


edit: apparently the QR code is for her linktree, which only has two links on it. A Twitter account with 0 tweets and an Instagram account with only her selfie on it.

LinkTree

 

[ZipDisk]

Calle Tacos

Jack was going to leave the taco shop, but then he smelled fud.

The waitress could not even identify what she brought to the table, damn. That place is retarded.
Jack drinks sauce again.

Tammy needs a filter, god damn.

Re: Busy
When Jack takes a shit he probably tries to write off the toilet paper as a business expense.

Whoever Jack hired to moderate comments sucks ass, there was a complete wealth building scam in the chicken sandwich videos comments.
It was at least ten shills deep. (Checked, it's still up.)

There's also a comment about them committing tax fraud on the chicken vid, which is chef's kiss amusing.

The wealth building scammer is on the busy video too but is more subtle.

Jack going back to restaurants he hated, amazing. As is the callback to Jack Classic.
Snead pushed too fuckin' hard, but he got his Jim Traenor sound byte.

YOUR WAY THE ELLIS WAY

I've rarely seen someone with this many ingredients in front of them be so confused.
The camera angle is unpleasant, and her voice constantly fades when she turns.

I also don't get why she piled all that shit to her left when she is obviously right-handed, there is an entire counter empty but for the mixer.

All JAKPAK members must use weirdly misshapen crockery!

I find it strange how something made from scratch could come out looking like boxed cornbread. The sauce looked truly unpleasant, like seagull shit.

If this is what we can expect from the JAKPAK universe, points for consistency.

I honestly don't get how a video for poundcake stretched out to nine minutes.

 

[rubytintedchix]

Rob got Jack to admit Tammy works from home two days a week (one of which being for yesterday’s live stream)



Okay for me and not thee?

 

[p1138]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=IzzKSJ0WDUgMainly just him whining about prices again.

Finally got around to watching this... I love how according to Tammy, 6 tacos and a plate of chips and guac between 2 people is a "snack". Not a meal, just a snack. And of course Fatty is angy because they didn't read the fucking menu and bought the wrong tacos because they ordered the $3.25 birria tacos, not the $5.99 quesabirria tacos and the only thing Fatty understands is "buria = dipping sauce".

$7.99 chips and guac
$6.50 for 2 birria tacos
$6 for 2 pastor tacos
$6 for 2 chicken tacos
So basically... $13.25 a person for lunch not including sodas. And somehow this is "pricey" for Fatty who expects 99 cent tacos or some bullshit(he's complained about prices before like it's still 2005 and there's been no inflation or anything since). Yet strangely enough the place has a 3.8/5 on yelp with plenty of pictures of the place being decently lit, clean, and of course every other normal human that's eaten there seems to get 3 tacos or 2 tacos and a side... not 3 tacos and a side and claims it's only a snack.

 

[Cumeatsioner Gordon]

Rob got Jack to admit Tammy works from home two days a week (one of which being for yesterday’s live stream)

View attachment 5406871

Okay for me and not thee?

View attachment 5406874

I hate this fat faggot so much.

 

[rubytintedchix]

Finally got around to watching this... I love how according to Tammy, 6 tacos and a plate of chips and guac between 2 people is a "snack". Not a meal, just a snack. And of course Fatty is angy because they didn't read the fucking menu and bought the wrong tacos because they ordered the $3.25 birria tacos, not the $5.99 quesabirria tacos and the only thing Fatty understands is "buria = dipping sauce".

$7.99 chips and guac
$6.50 for 2 birria tacos
$6 for 2 pastor tacos
$6 for 2 chicken tacos
So basically... $13.25 a person for lunch not including sodas. And somehow this is "pricey" for Fatty who expects 99 cent tacos or some bullshit(he's complained about prices before like it's still 2005 and there's been no inflation or anything since). Yet strangely enough the place has a 3.8/5 on yelp with plenty of pictures of the place being decently lit, clean, and of course every other normal human that's eaten there seems to get 3 tacos or 2 tacos and a side... not 3 tacos and a side and claims it's only a snack.

Not to mention that they went there for lunch, so this was likely a lunch portion of “Calle” (street) tacos. 4 seems like a decent lunch portion to me and Birria is pretty rich/greasy so I think most people would only be able to stomach 4 anyway. Street tacos are usually smaller in diameter so I’m not really sure what he was expecting.

If you’re still hungry, quit bitching and buy more to fill that fat cavernous belly of yours, Jack. Fat ass.

 

[a terminal posture]

Finally got around to watching this... I love how according to Tammy, 6 tacos and a plate of chips and guac between 2 people is a "snack". Not a meal, just a snack. And of course Fatty is angy because they didn't read the fucking menu and bought the wrong tacos because they ordered the $3.25 birria tacos, not the $5.99 quesabirria tacos and the only thing Fatty understands is "buria = dipping sauce".

$7.99 chips and guac
$6.50 for 2 birria tacos
$6 for 2 pastor tacos
$6 for 2 chicken tacos
So basically... $13.25 a person for lunch not including sodas. And somehow this is "pricey" for Fatty who expects 99 cent tacos or some bullshit(he's complained about prices before like it's still 2005 and there's been no inflation or anything since). Yet strangely enough the place has a 3.8/5 on yelp with plenty of pictures of the place being decently lit, clean, and of course every other normal human that's eaten there seems to get 3 tacos or 2 tacos and a side... not 3 tacos and a side and claims it's only a snack.

Chipotle in Hendersonville:
3 chicken taco $8.35
3 barbacoa $10.10
Chip & Guac $7.75

...or $13.10/person, basically the same price. You are probably getting more food at Chipotle but it still doesn't make it a good value. Everything is expensive these days and restaurants are even worse values they were. I remember getting a skirt steak + 2 sides for $4.50 every Saturday at La Terresita in Tampa back in 1998 too, that ain't ever coming back, even adjusting for inflation.

 

[p1138]

Not to mention that they went there for lunch, so this was likely a lunch portion of “Calle” (street) tacos. 4 seems like a decent lunch portion to me and Birria is pretty rich/greasy so I think most people would only be able to stomach 4 anyway. Street tacos are usually smaller in diameter so I’m not really sure what he was expecting.

If you’re still hungry, quit bitching and buy more to fill that fat cavernous belly of yours, Jack. Fat ass.

Ah, but that was the other part that confused Tammy. She complained about having the option to leave the tab open as if she didn't understand it was to order more or get some drinks.

The reality is, Fatty will have no problem dropping $30/person to gorge himself on grease and rate it an A, but when presented with anything resembling a normal meal for a normal human... C.

 

[Super Hans v2]

Ah, but that was the other part that confused Tammy. She complained about having the option to leave the tab open as if she didn't understand it was to order more or get some drinks.

Please be patient, they usually only go to fast food and other goyslop that you pre-pay. They'd have blood shooting out their eyes from rage if they went to a proper restaurant.

 

[ZipDisk]

Street tacos are supposed to be small. The last time I had the house to myself I pigged out on street tacos like a feral jackass the entire time. It was... liberating.
Still ate healthier than the Scalfani's on Profile by Sanford.

I think the scalfatties are expecting oversized portions because many strip mall restaurants do cater to that specification, and as speculated in ancient times, they see waddlers come in, and know to serve up the big plate. (Because the obese always feel cheated if they aren't stuffed to the edge of shitting themselves.)

That's... not an exaggeration. There are videos where jack seems angry he isn't uncomfortably full after eating. That is super gross.
The only place I've really seen "GOD DAMN" sized portions is truck stops. I salute the soon to be congestive heart failure patients who keep our country running.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

They drink, they just pretend not to. Jack was going through bottles of gentleman Jack pretty quickly earlier this year and whenever he cooks with wine he'll get a big 1.5l bottle when he only needs a half cup.

Of course they do but it's just funny that he denies it all the time and gets pissy about it. Like that time they met Jane Traynor at that brewery and Jagoff was bitching about going to a brewery. You could tell he wanted a beer but Hammy wouldn't let him so he needs to play it up like alcohol is evil.

For the duration of his cooking show he's almost exclusively bought Yellow Tail, presumably because Australian wine was in vogue at the turn of the century and because it's Jack

Tried Yellow Tail once and never again. I found out later that it was a wine made for the export market, specifically the US. It wasn't found in Australia at all although now I understand it is.

Yellow Tail is swill. It's bottom of the barrel wine with added sugar. Nasty stuff. But perfect for somebody who doesn't know the first thing about wine.

Here is her channel:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=0js6xhGwuR4

Rather amateur and unprofessional but what do you expect from a member of the JackPack?

She really needs to stop going "uhmmm" all the time. It's distracting.

 

[Kosher Salt]

Jack is still not over the KC vs Jets game where Patrick Mahomes ran down the clock instead of scoring another touchdown. Definitely not because KC wanted to prevent the Jets from having the ball in a close game.

That was already a 3-point game, so it doesn't even make sense. Your worst case scenario - you score 6, miss the extra point (despite having a really good kicker), and you're up by 9. That's a two possession game. You win.

In the Packers/Rams clip posted a page back, there was only a 2-point lead. There, if you take the touchdown, your worst case scenario is that you're only up 8. The other team uses the last few seconds and scores a touchdown + runs it in for 2 extra points? Tie game.

I guess you save your defensive squad having to come out for another couple of plays, but it's not outcome-determinative.

If you actually watch the play where Mahomes supposedly slid, there was a Jets player positioned to tackle him before he reached the end zone. And sure, maybe he scores the touchdown, but they didn't need the points, and he might not have wanted to risk an injury. He's a QB, not a runningback.

 

[Chorton]

Fucking Rob, I just about died when the drumbeat came on:

"First of all, it's annoying so please stop it. Secondly, don't you have some noise-cancelling microphone or some software on your computer that could help you with this?"

 

[Polska krowa]

Here is her channel’s art work, I think we all know who designed this:

That's literally an up arrow with a thick brown line (to look like gingerbread?) and three squares (with one sent to back)

 

[Sonic T]

Fucking Rob, I just about died when the drumbeat came on:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=KhLBfcBEguM:47
"First of all, it's annoying so please stop it. Secondly, don't you have some noise-cancelling microphone or some software on your computer that could help you with this?"

He even specifically said "some software on your expensive computer."

The universe cursed us with a Jack, but it blessed us with a Rob.

 

[Exist0]

Steam broccoli, the star of the show! Oh Rob, you are a treasure.