Australian politics general - Vegemite chic

I thought I'd start this politics general today as it's election day here in Australia, after the longest most gruelling campaign in half a century.

It's been a battle between 2 vague variants of neo-Liberalism and the outliers: Greens, centrists like the Xenophon team, battler welfare state right-wingers like Jacqui Lambie and sex-positive left Libertarians like the Sex party.

Slowly and surely the consensus around the 2 party system is fading away. The horrified gasps from the commentariat about a multi-party coalition, an occurrence quite normal in Europe, shows that the duopoly parties and their media class 'insiders' don't really get it. As with other Western nations, their social base has withered away into a husk of branch-stacking and glib real-estate agents looking for planning favours.

Just to start, how was your election? Any rancid nutters ranting outside a polling both, any decent sausage sizzles? Any thoughts on the supposed 10 year deficit? Mathias Cormann's terminator impressions?

Also, any non-Australians are free to join in with fully sick banter.

Some resources:

http://aec.gov.au/

http://australianpolitics.com/

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/national-affairs/newspoll

http://www.aph.gov.au/About_Parliam...heet_20_-_The_Australian_system_of_government

 

[Sailor_Jupiter]

WHAT ABOUT MEAT PIES- how can I have an opinion about Australian candidates without knowing their opinion on meat pies? @Dynastia would not approve.

 

[Vitriol]

WHAT ABOUT MEAT PIES- how can I have an opinion about Australian candidates without knowing their opinion on meat pies? @Dynastia would not approve.

could you give us a brief outline of how the legislature, executive and judiciary is formed?

a summary of each pol party would also be appreciated

 

[Splendid]

Who cares? It's literally Austrailia.

 

[Begemot]

could you give us a brief outline of how the legislature, executive and judiciary is formed?

a summary of each pol party would also be appreciated

Australia is a Federal Westminster system comprising 6 states and three territories.


Judicial:The high court is the supreme court. There are also numerous state supreme courts leading up to it.

Executive: Govenor general, a figurehead (apart from Whitlam crisis during 1970's). Appointed by the Queen.

Legislative:A Bicameral parliament. A population proportionate 150 seat house of representatives and an upper house of 76 seats, the senate with all states receiving equal seats. Leader is leader of party with most seats.

Elections are compulsory to attend and are based upon preferential voting: candidates are ranked & voted upon by preference. So one can preference a minor party and still have that vote down to a major party.


2 main contenders for government:

Malcolm Turnbull, ex-merchant banker. A moderate charming sweet-talker who recently took over via a spill from hard-line religious conservative Tony Abbott. Has had to compromise on his previous stances on marriage equality and a carbon price.
Leader of the Coalition:
Liberal party: A fusion between liberals (in the U.K lib Dem sense) & conservatives. Standard rules apply, free market since the late 1970's. Struggles between the conservative right and moderates.
National Party:smaller party, Agrarian, more social conservative, torn between traditional support for tarrifs and current orthodoxy with free markets.

Bill Shorten, a middle class unionist, good at backroom deals, glib, has a surprisingly big target approach.
Leader of the Labor party.
A Centre-left party, successfully prosecuted neo-liberal reforms in 1980's that helped shape Tony Blair's idea of a 'third way', caught between slowly dying trade union movement and inner city cultural class.



Other players.

Richard Di Natale.
Greens
Inner city professional. Leader of one of the world's most successful Green parties. Heavily eating into Labor's hipster/ culture class support base in the inner cities.Have 10 senators out of 76 senators. Looking for balance of power


Nick Xenophon
nxt
South Australian senator, centrist, emphasis on anti pokies (slot machines which are very numerous in Australia and have large lobby groups), Australian manufacturing as opposed to TPP.

WHAT ABOUT MEAT PIES- how can I have an opinion about Australian candidates without knowing their opinion on meat pies? @Dynastia would not approve.

Dunno, Malcolm would probably go for something posh. I just had a mince and onion pie just then, actually.

 

[AnOminous]

Someone give me one reason not to delete a thread about politics in some place I never even heard of.

 

[Begemot]

Someone give me one reason not to delete a thread about politics in some place I never even heard of.

Australia is part of the general anglosphere, its GDP is pretty high and is part of the ANZUS and 5 eyes intelligence
treaties. We're pretty cool, bruh.
Still, if you think this is irrelevant....I just would have thought there would be more Australians here, maybe Dynastia is out voting.

 

[Coldgrip]

Literally who?

 

[glass_houses]

I usually vote Greens, personally, regardless of whether it's local, state or federal. Unless the Liberals are trying to do something especially heinous, in which case it's Labor.

Regardless of whether Labor's "campaign to save Medicare" is entirely factional or no, if Turnbull manages to push the changes through, it's a very, very short step after that to go full on murikun retard. And the way he wants to outsource the administration and most of the staff from overseas... okay, it'll save some money in the long term, but in the short term there's a massive amount of jobs gone, people who worked for Centrelink or Medicare are now dependent on them to survive.

$100 000 university degrees. It's the same spectacular stupidity as John Howard's destruction of the apprenticeship scheme. "This will save Australia money! Wait, what do you mean that three years later the cost of fixing a drain pipe will be ten times more expensive and you'll be reduced to kidnapping random plumbers in the night? That's just Labor scare mongering!"

Also, the insane decision to slaughter the CSIRO weather research program. It doesn't matter whether or not global warming is actually happening, detailed weather research and monitoring is quite literally a matter of life or death, especially in a country with severe extremes of weather as this one.

"See that, Bazza? Pasture's nice and green. It obviously rains around here a lot. Let's insanely overstock it with 300 head of cattle per acre."

"But Mick, what happens if it doesn't rain for another twelve months?"

"Do you know anything about farming, Bazza?"

"Well, there are a lot of cattle stations around this area that have been mysteriously abandoned, Mick, maybe there's a reason for that?"

"Okay Bazza, prove to me that weather's to blame and not Woolies and Coles systematically annihilating just about every sector of agriculture?"

"Well, I guess I can't, Mick. There aren't really many records around here."

"And that, Bazza, is why I call the shots around here. Go hit the local livestock auctions will you? There's so many cheap skinny cattle selling there that we can get a thousand head for 50C a kilo!"

TWELVE MONTHS LATER:

"Bazza mate, where did we go wrong?"

"Not a clue, Mick. Not a clue. How were we to know that drought cycles outnumber flood cycles 10 to 1 in this area? Them scientists keep going on about 'Southern Osscialtion' and 'El Nino' and La Nina', and 'long term weather patterns' maybe there's something to what they're saying?"

"Them scientists don't know anything, Bazza. They need to do some real work in the real world!"

"Whatever you say, Mick. Whatever you say."

 

[Begemot]

I usually vote Greens, personally, regardless of whether it's local, state or federal. Unless the Liberals are trying to do something especially heinous, in which case it's Labor.

Regardless of whether Labor's "campaign to save Medicare" is entirely factional or no, if Turnbull manages to push the changes through, it's a very, very short step after that to go full on murikun exceptional individual. And the way he wants to outsource the administration and most of the staff from overseas... okay, it'll save some money in the long term, but in the short term there's a massive amount of jobs gone, people who worked for Centrelink or Medicare are now dependent on them to survive.

$100 000 university degrees. It's the same spectacular stupidity as John Howard's destruction of the apprenticeship scheme. "This will save Australia money! Wait, what do you mean that three years later the cost of fixing a drain pipe will be ten times more expensive and you'll be reduced to kidnapping random plumbers in the night? That's just Labor scare mongering!"

Also, the insane decision to slaughter the CSIRO weather research program. It doesn't matter whether or not global warming is actually happening, detailed weather research and monitoring is quite literally a matter of life or death, especially in a country with severe extremes of weather as this one.

"See that, Bazza? Pasture's nice and green. It obviously rains around here a lot. Let's insanely overstock it with 300 head of cattle per acre."

"But Mick, what happens if it doesn't rain for another twelve months?"

"Do you know anything about farming, Bazza?"

"Well, there are a lot of cattle stations around this area that have been mysteriously abandoned, Mick, maybe there's a reason for that?"

"Okay Bazza, prove to me that weather's to blame and not Woolies and Coles systematically annihilating just about every sector of agriculture?"

"Well, I guess I can't, Mick. There aren't really many records around here."

"And that, Bazza, is why I call the shots around here. Go hit the local livestock auctions will you? There's so many cheap skinny cattle selling there that we can get a thousand head for 50C a kilo!"

TWELVE MONTHS LATER:

View attachment 110837

"Bazza mate, where did we go wrong?"

"Not a clue, Mick. Not a clue. How were we to know that drought cycles outnumber flood cycles 10 to 1 in this area? Them scientists keep going on about 'Southern Osscialtion' and 'El Nino' and La Nina', and 'long term weather patterns' maybe there's something to what they're saying?"

"Them scientists don't know anything, Bazza. They need to do some real work in the real world!"

"Whatever you say, Mick. Whatever you say."

Pretty much, mate. I hate how Australian conservatives believe one of the most fragile and dry landscapes in the world can be treated like a fucking mining site. They don't get it. In America there's a term called 'green tea' where it's tea party guys who support renewable energy out of Libertarian values. You do some some equivalent cross-over here with the 'lock the gate' anti CSG movements, I guess.

I put Xenophon's team first for the senate, though. I fucking hate pokies, mate, they are bottom-feeding scum who use the brain's neural pathways to make money from lonely and depressed working class people. The Liberals also should have never dared the Automotive industry to move away, that was utterly pathetic.

 

[AnOminous]

This thread erroneously assumes that anyone cares about Australia.

Other than being afraid of @Dynastia, nobody gives a flying fuck about this worthless continent.

"Whatever you say, Mick. Whatever you say."

Your country doesn't even exist! Nobody cares about it, it's just this thing that nobody cares about.

Do you even eat meat pies?

 

[ActualKiwi]

Lol Australia. It's a giant wasteland full of abbos, dingoes and criminals.

 

[glass_houses]

Pretty much, mate. I hate how Australian conservatives believe one of the most fragile and dry landscapes in the world can be treated like a fucking mining site. They don't get it. In America there's a term called 'green tea' where it's tea party guys who support renewable energy out of Libertarian values. You do some some equivalent cross-over here with the 'lock the gate' anti CSG movements, I guess.

I put Xenophon's team first for the senate, though. I fucking hate pokies, mate, they are bottom-feeding scum who use the brain's neural pathways to make money from lonely and depressed working class people. The Liberals also should have never dared the Automotive industry to move away, that was utterly pathetic.

I'm not overly fond of the pokies myself. I've relatives on both sides of the family who've legit addictions. My sister's eldest son talked his way into my brother's home and nicked about five grand, put it all down the pokies. On my mother's, I've an aunt who fed my grandparents' house down down same. I've a severe compulsive streak myself. I play maybe once a year, allocate some cash and give my purse to someone else to watch. Another problem Australia wide is lotto; gambling addiction isn't restricted to the TAB or the pokies. I recently added up how much I've spent on lotto tickets over the past couple of months and holy shit.

Xenophon does good work with the pokies, work that needs to be done. There are, however, matters that are much, much more pressing in the long term.

 

[glass_houses]

Lol Australia. It's a giant wasteland full of abbos, dingoes and criminals.

Nobody asked you, sheep fucker.

Do you even eat meat pies?

On occasion. It's hard to get good ones. I'm a traditional mince and gravy myself, but really the only place you can really get those anymore are the frozen crap you get at the supermarkets. The vast majority of good bakeries these days do all sorts of meat pies that are everything except plain mince and gravy. If you want one of those, you have to go downmarket to a sub tier place and get a sub tier pie, in that case you needn't have bothered.

 

[AnOminous]

So far as I know, there's only one poster to this site from this nonexistent place, apparently a wasteland inhabited by nobody.

Apparently, at some point, the real country known as England offloaded worthless people nobody cares about there, because they committed vile crimes, and now these vermin claim they're a country.

Here's a confirmed photograph of the only human known to inhabit that weird thing you call a country.

Yeah. . .I mean no.

So go huff some more gasoline, abbo. Nobody cares about your fake country.

 

[ActualKiwi]

Nobody asked you, sheep fucker.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=jG6JFrWjGTE


On occasion. It's hard to get good ones. I'm a traditional mince and gravy myself, but really the only place you can really get those anymore are the frozen crap you get at the supermarkets. The vast majority of good bakeries these days do all sorts of meat pies that are everything except plain mince and gravy. If you want one of those, you have to go downmarket to a sub tier place and get a sub tier pie, in that case you needn't have bothered.

Umadbro? Can't even beat some Emus.
Also: We export plenty of lamb to aus. Pre-marinaded of course.

 

[Begemot]

So far as I know, there's only one poster to this site from this nonexistent place, apparently a wasteland inhabited by nobody.

Apparently, at some point, the real country known as England offloaded worthless people nobody cares about there, because they committed vile crimes, and now these vermin claim they're a country.

Here's a confirmed photograph of the only human known to inhabit that weird thing you call a country.

View attachment 110841

Yeah. . .I mean no.

So go huff some more gasoline, abbo. Nobody cares about your fake country.

Talk about fucking sweet bantz! Fucking choice as, mate!

This thread erroneously assumes that anyone cares about Australia.

Other than being afraid of @Dynastia, nobody gives a flying fuck about this worthless continent.



Your country doesn't even exist! Nobody cares about it, it's just this thing that nobody cares about.

Do you even eat meat pies?

I will always eat meat pies. They are the meaty gravy in my veins.

I'm not overly fond of the pokies myself. I've relatives on both sides of the family who've legit addictions. My sister's eldest son talked his way into my brother's home and nicked about five grand, put it all down the pokies. On my mother's, I've an aunt who fed my grandparents' house down down same. I've a severe compulsive streak myself. I play maybe once a year, allocate some cash and give my purse to someone else to watch. Another problem Australia wide is lotto; gambling addiction isn't restricted to the TAB or the pokies. I recently added up how much I've spent on lotto tickets over the past couple of months and holy shit.

Xenophon does good work with the pokies, work that needs to be done. There are, however, matters that are much, much more pressing in the long term.

Climate change is admitedly more important. Negative gearing is a fuckfest of baby-boomers and overseas investors creating a housing pubble that will eventually pop.

 

[Begemot]

Umadbro? Can't even beat some Emus.
Also: We export plenty of lamb to aus. Pre-marinaded of course.

We have plenty of unfucked ewes over here, quite frankly, you may keep your creamy 'marinade' to yourself.
Please tell me you voted for based ACT, that would give you a smidgen more respect in my eyes.

 

[glass_houses]

Talk about fucking sweet bantz! Fucking choice as, mate!

I will always eat meat pies. They are the meaty gravy in my veins.


Climate change is admitedly more important. Negative gearing is a fuckfest of baby-boomers and overseas investors creating a housing pubble that will eventually pop.

Tell me about it. No one can afford to buy houses, so who is buying all the houses?

 

[AnOminous]

Tell me about it. No one can afford to buy houses, so who is buying all the houses?

Nobody. Provide pictures. Nobody would willingly live in that shithole.

You live in the only country in the world where the only inhabitants were literally sentenced to live there because of the crimes they committed.