💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Fascist Frederick]

Someone could smoke 2 packs a day and get diagnosed with lung cancer tomorrow and they'd still outlive Jack.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Someone could smoke 2 packs a day and get diagnosed with lung cancer tomorrow and they'd still outlive Jack.

Jagoff is like a cockroach. He's really hard to put down.

 

[Grassy_Knoll]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=M_-HD-dCXgE

This mans never seen an episode of spongebob in his life

I find myself wondering if we are underestimating Jack's delusional thought processing that this is a Job-like test from God and, unless he truly is in a fully incapacitated state, he will find a way to carry on with the shows he half-assedly creates and Hammy will continue to support him because that's the watered down americanized Christian way of supporting her husband "until death does them part" while getting dicked down on the side by Jim Trainor.

Jack has committed every deadly sin and a broken a good portion of the commandments (i.e. coveting thy neighbors chilli). He is by no means a devout Christian.

 

[Skwisgaar Skwigelf]

Jacks entire life immortalized in glorious UML!

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

Jacks entire life immortalized in glorious UML!

Incomplete. There is no end state for this algorithm. Both eat flows must return to start.

 

[biggacracka]

Incomplete. There is no end state for this algorithm. Both eat flows must return to start.

10 EAT MEAT
20 EAT CHEESE
30 PRINT "GUD"
40 GOTO 10

 

[Skwisgaar Skwigelf]

Incomplete. There is no end state for this algorithm. Both eat flows must return to start.

Correct, the program I used to throw this together wouldn't let me do that without creating a visual nightmare

 

[Dave.]

Presented without comment

View attachment 4570825

He’s still in the hospital? Goddamn

 

[Whaler]

He’s still in the hospital? Goddamn

You're surprised that a man who just suffered his fourth stroke and can barely use his arm is still in the hospital because of said stroke?

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

I'll always welcome more takedowns on that disgusting church chilli video. The criticisms of the reaction video crowd are valid though. I find the asian chef dude to be cringe but I do find his guests entertaining though especially the one from this last video. He wasn't as uptight as some of his previous guests.. maybe because he didn't have formal training in culinary arts.

The absolute best Jagoff takedown videos are the ones by Jack Vlogs. His stupidity is spliced so perfectly into clips that you don't need any commentary.

 

[Sonic T]

I have a craving for a JotG video where a nurse pushes him in a wheelchair into an elevator, down to the first floor, into the cafeteria, and then she pushes him through the lunch line so that he can get his chicken and taters.

 

[Gloria The Glorious]

Since Jack could be pronounced dead any moment now and this thread gets locked out of respect the final kek, I want to bring up something I know we all have seen but seldom talk about because it's never the worst part of anything the fat man touched: His cope.

The amount of times Jack has said "beautiful/gorgeous" for his food no matter what, often multiple times. He has to, every step of the way, compliment his food because no one else will. It doesn't help his good food is basic bitch stuff that a literal duck could cook correctly with half the cholesterol and twice the flavor, and his worst food is raw, rotten, or party cheese salad. But the next time you hate yourself enough to watch his content (or watch someone else react to him because the mere act of pausing Jack every few seconds is sadly an improvement), keep track of how often he says "beautiful" and "gorgeous" to his bastardized Thanksgiving Stuffing that ends up looking and probably smelling like Frito Pie.

Am I the only one who finds this to be one of his worst traits in his proper videos, or is the fact that he supports cheese more than both Dakotas and Canada combined do still hold that award?

 

[Dave.]

Since Jack could be pronounced dead any moment now and this thread gets locked out of respect the final kek, I want to bring up something I know we all have seen but seldom talk about because it's never the worst part of anything the fat man touched: His cope.

The amount of times Jack has said "beautiful/gorgeous" for his food no matter what, often multiple times. He has to, every step of the way, compliment his food because no one else will. It doesn't help his good food is basic bitch stuff that a literal duck could cook correctly with half the cholesterol and twice the flavor, and his worst food is raw, rotten, or party cheese salad. But the next time you hate yourself enough to watch his content (or watch someone else react to him because the mere act of pausing Jack every few seconds is sadly an improvement), keep track of how often he says "beautiful" and "gorgeous" to his bastardized Thanksgiving Stuffing that ends up looking and probably smelling like Frito Pie.

Am I the only one who finds this to be one of his worst traits in his proper videos, or is the fact that he supports cheese more than both Dakotas and Canada combined do still hold that award?

I know you’re being hyperbolic, but do we have a concrete update on his health status? I don’t think you can just walk off a fourth impact.

 

[Adamska]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=cBklnQogpeM
Given Jack's health crisis, is it really ethical or in good taste for YouTube personalities to keep posting videos that make fun of Jack's cooking skills?

Who cares? Fucking die, Jack.

Faggot paywalled part of the video again, and for a "pro chef" he apparently never made chili. I legit turned it off the moment he did the former, and it was only his co-commentator that kept me from doing it earlier. Also he's a fucking retard; you can easily and safely not worry about frozen food for at least 3 or so months if your freezer, be it industrial or family made isn't shit and you stored the stuff competently. I'm not bothering with his channel anymore.

As for Jack, reminder that when he whines about hypocrisy, this is the same retard who only showed up to Planet Fitness to eat pizza. Also don't whine about smoking when you pounded down a Cheddar Burger the day after having both a stroke and heart attack.

 

[D_Tractor]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=M_-HD-dCXgEAh yes that's a good one, in the beginning: "It's one of my favorite cartoons. It always has been. There's so many good cartoons out there..." Jack basically admitting he does nothing but sit around and watch cartoons all day.

This version is much more appetizing:

 

[Grassy_Knoll]

This version is much more appetizing:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=KofI6ocTLE8

From the thumbnail alone it looks like Jack got his burger construction wrong, a quick visit to the spongebob wiki also confirms this. Well done Jack on fucking up the only thing that could make your shitty burger resemble a krabby patty


And before anyone says he's basing it off the krabby patty from the episode "pickles" just know that its technically a Double Triple Bossy Deluxe and he also fucked that up. Pic related

 

[Dave.]

Decided to keep going down the rabbit hole. He pokes holes into the bacon and the bacon, no surprise, came out dry and crunchy. He then also decided to dry out hashbrowns not in a strainer, but in a fucking dish towel. He doesn't rinse the starch off (or the fucking fabric from the dishtowel for that matter good god that made me MATI) in a sink and instead cooks it unmolested in a used pan he used for the bacon. You guys were not fucking around when you said he was the DSP of cooking, this guy just continues to surprise me with how ineptly he handles even the most barebones basic shit like hashbrowns.

 

[DontEatThat_2.0]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=HT-Z2AMzw3wDecided to keep going down the rabbit hole. He pokes holes into the bacon and the bacon, no surprise, came out dry and crunchy. He then also decided to dry out hashbrowns not in a strainer, but in a fucking dish towel. He doesn't rinse the starch off (or the fucking fabric from the dishtowel for that matter good god that made me MATI) in a sink and instead cooks it unmolested in a used pan he used for the bacon. You guys were not fucking around when you said he was the DSP of cooking, this guy just continues to surprise me with how ineptly he handles even the most barebones basic shit like hashbrowns.

"That looks more like me....in a more relaxed position too."

Im sure Jack would regret that statement now, if he had the cognizance, awareness or even basic understanding of how comical his is situation is.

 

[Dave.]

View attachment 4582620
"That looks more like me....in a more relaxed position too."

Im sure Jack would regret that statement now, if he had the cognizance, awareness or even basic understanding of how comical his is situation is.

That looks more like him in a couple more years when he's carried out in the casket.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

Faggot paywalled part of the video again, and for a "pro chef" he apparently never made chili. I legit turned it off the moment he did the former, and it was only his co-commentator that kept me from doing it earlier. Also he's a fucking retard; you can easily and safely not worry about frozen food for at least 3 or so months if your freezer, be it industrial or family made isn't shit and you stored the stuff competently. I'm not bothering with his channel anymore.

As for Jack, reminder that when he whines about hypocrisy, this is the same retard who only showed up to Planet Fitness to eat pizza. Also don't whine about smoking when you pounded down a Cheddar Burger the day after having both a stroke and heart attack.

This "chef" is a reality TV poser that runs a hipster sandwich shop in Brooklyn that charges $20 for a fucking hoagie. Not much better than Jack IMO.