- Joined
- Jun 16, 2020
Alright people, I finally did. I finally goddamn recapped the first episode.
[Jazz is 14 in this season. He’s been on estrogen for 2 years now.]
Season 1, Episode 1
[the description of this episode on Discovery+ is “Worried about keeping male puberty at bay, Jazz visits the doctor”.]
This might not be as good as @Muttnik, but hopefully, I’ll make this entertaining, despite all the shit that goes down the first episode. Just so you know, when they do the opening theme, that is where it plays Jeanette saying about Jazz, “She asked me, Mommy am I boy or a girl?” RED FLAG ALERT!! If Jazz knew he was a girl, why would he be confused and ask Mommy Dearest that? But I digress.
[[To make things fun, I have invented a drinking game for this episode. Anytime that boobs or butts is talked about, take a drink. Do a double when it involves Jazz! You’ll be tipsy in no time!]]
Anyhoo
The recaps of other episodes will not be this long, but I just wanted to highlight how fucked up the very first episode was, and how much it forewarned of what was to come.
ETA: I played the drinking game watching this episode, which is why so many typos and grammar mishaps.
[Jazz is 14 in this season. He’s been on estrogen for 2 years now.]
Season 1, Episode 1
[the description of this episode on Discovery+ is “Worried about keeping male puberty at bay, Jazz visits the doctor”.]
This might not be as good as @Muttnik, but hopefully, I’ll make this entertaining, despite all the shit that goes down the first episode. Just so you know, when they do the opening theme, that is where it plays Jeanette saying about Jazz, “She asked me, Mommy am I boy or a girl?” RED FLAG ALERT!! If Jazz knew he was a girl, why would he be confused and ask Mommy Dearest that? But I digress.
[[To make things fun, I have invented a drinking game for this episode. Anytime that boobs or butts is talked about, take a drink. Do a double when it involves Jazz! You’ll be tipsy in no time!]]
Anyhoo
1. TLC crew “How would you describe yourself?” “I am a teenage girl!” “I’m also transgender and I’m proud of that!” “I am Jazz”
2. Jeanette asks Jazz to cut onions and he declines. Sander and Griffin are kicking a soccer ball sadly to each other, relegated to the outdoors lest they distract Jeanette away from golden child.
3. They are allowed in once Greg arrives with pizza and wings. No idea why Jeanette was chopping onions if she wasn’t cooking.
4. Jeanette is introduced first, then she introduces Greg. It’s clear on who wears the pants of this family! Then she blathers on about how they met and blah blah blah. Oh wait, Jeanette is older than Greg!! He used to “play” with her brother but didn’t want to hang out with her.
5. Greg: “Jeanette was the older girl next door and I DID WANT TO PLAY WITH HER!!” Weird relationship dynamics there, especially since they’re only a year apart or so.
6. They apparently have to eat the pizza and wings out doors, Ari dares to sit down next to Jeanette, and Greg tells her to move, Ari says the other chair is wet but yet still has to move to it. One of the twins tells her to suck it up as she’s only there for a couple of days (I think it’s Sander, but I don’t give a shit about the twins, so whatever)
7. Jeanette: “I’m a MOM of FOUR wonderful children!” Clearly has issues of Ari moved out of the house and away from her control. Does a forced toast, then warns the twins when they move out for college and visit home for spring break they’ll see it’s not the same. (this might be why they hardly visit now)
8. Greg says you’ll hear Griffin whistling around the house, and Sander will be looking at himself in a mirror. OMFG, this is hilarious. The parents think so too, “LOL looking at himself in the mirror!”
9. They ask Ari about her hardest class, which is math. They then immediately ask Jazz what math class he’s taking which is geometry. Wow, way to put down Ari. I think they realize how mean that way, cause it immediately cuts to a different dynamic, where the twins try to divert away from that subtle put down.
10. Cue to Jazz being born, and Grandma Cross Eyes lets everyone know “That’s a boy for sure!”
11. Jeanette forces the family to praise Jazz “Wasn’t she the cutest little thing?” Sander, I think, replies “Now you’ve grown up into a nice blossoming big girl now!” …..I don’t think that’s an appropriate for a brother to say to a sister. But then again, I wasn’t raised in a fucked up family.
12. Cue to praising Jazz. Jeanette reminds Ari used to hold Jazz like it was Ari’s own baby. AND ARI DROPPED JAZZ AS A BABY!! But don’t worry, it’s just runs in the family, as Greg also dropped Ari as a baby.
13. TLC seems to want to get the fuck out of this, so cue Ari saying Jazz always gravitated to girly things. He wore my stuff, so clearly, he was a girl.
14. Greg was in denial. Just a passing phase. AH! We get to the part where Jeanette was on a computer and Jazz goes into the whole “when’s the good fairy gonna wave her wand and change my penis into a vagina?” Like, how does a kid like that ever see a vagina and fixate on it? Are the family secret nudists? Sexual abuse? No normal kids says this. “I was so confused my two year old was speaking like an adult!!”
15. Jeanette freaks out like OMG MY KID IS NOT NORMAL!! what do to, what to do...DOCTOR TIME!!
16. Jazz: Doctor held up two dolls. One was a girl and had girl parts (WTF kind of dolls are they making with genitalia for kids!?) the other way a boy and had boy parts.
17. Doctor: Which genitalia do you have right now? WTF kind of doctor/therapist asks that goddamn question? Then “Which do you want?” The obsession with genitalia in three year olds is not normal and begs the question of what are they being exposed to/having done to them? Jazz: points to girl doll
18. “I have a girl brain in a boy body. I think like a girl, but I...but I just have a boy body.”
19. Jeanette pretends that losing her little boy was hard and she was just so distraught. She forced Jazz to go to school dressed as a boy, but only because the school was filled with bigots!! Jazz needs to be affirmed by mommy putting two pigtails in his hair. Jeanette just gets so emotional over emasculating her son.
20. Twins want to go to the beach, Jazz wants to go too. It’s very subtle, but twins are passive aggressive, as they clearly don’t want to have to include Jazz.
21. BATHING SUIT SHOPPING TIME!! With Ari of course.
22. Oh noes, Jazz is not a little girl anymore!! HIGH SCHOOL!!
23. Jeanette tells the kids she never wants them to grow up and leave her. Greg pouts “You don’t want to be alone with me?” Jeanette never answers. Lmao
24. Jazz and Ari driving to get bathing suits. Blah blah blah, goes into the origins of Jazz’s name. Jazz pesters Ari about her high school appearance, and apparently thinks she was antisocial, and Ari was like, I had a boyfriend?
25. Grandma Cross Eyes and Grandpa show up to have tea with Jeanette and so she can talk about Jazz going to the doctor.b
26. Grandma Cross Eyes was devastated by Jeanette trooning out Jazz, while Grandpa looks down at the floor as though in shame. They had no one to talk to about this, so went to a professional. Wonder if Jeanette told them who to go see. Grandpa is flabbergasted of his grandson being dressed like a girl. So he decides to educate himself and goes on the internet instead of seeking a therapist/psychiatrist.
27. Jeanette talks about the time she educated the pediatrician about Jazz, and yet they still had the audacity to ask, “So does she have a penis?” Jeanette says that everyone is always curious about Jazz’s genitals, and it’s the most common question people ask about him. But only because Jazz looks like a real girl.
28. Grandpa makes the grave mistake of saying “transgenders”, and Jeanette is quick to correct him on the proper term, while looking extremely smug and haughty. Grandpa “I’m learning the language from you, my dear.” omg, then Grandma Cross Eyes, since they’re being educated on what not to say, asks, “Not trannies?” ‘NO!” says Jeanette. Grandma Cross Eyes looks surprised, but with how wonky she looks anyway, who the fuck knows.
29. Grandma Cross Eyes states she’s from a generation that wasn’t plagued with trannies and crazy women medically experimenting on their kid, and “we’re still on this journey”.
30. Back to Ari and Jazz, still driving on the way to the bathing suit store. They talk of what kind of bathing suit to get, and Jazz thinks he’ll stick to tankinis, but Ari says not to limit himself because there could be like 1000 suits there!! Jazz says all the fat goes to him stomach (a harbinger of what’s to come). “Why can’t it go to my butt and my boobs!?!”
31. Jazz remembers a nightmare he had when he was 2 or 3 (who the fuck even remembers dreams from that age!?!) that giant mustaches and beards were chasing him around trying to attach to his face. Jazz wakes up and runs to Mommy Dearest, who promises, “Don’t worry, that’s never going to happen. I’LL NEVER LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU!” Hmm…
32. Back to Jeanette telling the crypt keepers Jazz’s doctor appointment. They talk about estrogen. Ew, Jeanette says that Jazz is developing nicely into a young lady. They talk about Jazz developing breasts. God, I’d feel creeped out if my mother told her parents about me growing boobs. “Her breasts are blossoming!” WHO SAYS THIS TO THEIR PARENTS ABOUT THEIR KIDS!?!
33. Jeanette admits transing Jazz is experimental stuff. “Like I am messing with my kids body.” Gram and Granps just nod and look checked out.
34. Finally Jazz and Ari are the bikini store. They choose the one store that doesn’t sell tankinis. Even if Jazz gets a bathing suit, he still has to wear something over the bottoms lest people see his bulge.
35.Jazz comes out in a one piece and skirt, doesn’t like how low cut it is, then pushes his moobs together. Ari, “No you don’t have to do that.” Ari reassures Jazz she can see the formation of his moobs, and he’s not completely flat. Jazz laments he had to grow his breasts with estrogen.
36. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are going go the beach. Jazz is wearing his new bikini, complete with a cover up top and skirt.
37. Griffin is single and Sander had a girlfriend one time but they had complications, probably because he’s an annoying, insufferable douche. He’s single but taken, whTatever that means.
38. OMG, literally everyone in this fucking family talks about Jazz’s boobs. Goddamn, that is some sort of emotional incest shit.
39. The twins talk about Jazz’s lack of male suitors. Now WTF they tell Jazz “guys shouldn’t care about your boobs”. They talk about Jazz dating, and that they’re going to interrogate the poor dude who wants to date Jazz. Make sure he’s perfect. O.o
40. Beach time. They kick a volleyball around and it’s so sad to see how athletic Jazz used to be. :[
41. Make up shopping time, but only just Jeanette and Jazz of course. She sure does love to be there when she emasculates him. Jeanette scolds Jazz for using a brush, but then herself breaks a sample lipstick. LMFAO, some fag asks them if they need help, and Jazz wants a full makeover, then tells Jeanette she needs one too. Jeanette states she’s already wearing make up (lmao) and Jazz tells her at least she doesn’t look orange today. Oh burn, he tells “you have days when you look like an Oompa Loompa.” But it’s everyone elses fault for not telling her she looks like one before she goes out. Jeanette is makeup whore.
42. Jazz doesn’t seem to be into makeup and states a lot of girls don’t wear makeup. Jeanette gaslights him and tells him she sees A LOT of girls wearing makeup.
43. Jeanette and Jazz go to some restaurant. Jeanette admits Jazz is not little anymore. Jazz takes it to her calling him fat. HMMMMM….The tranny freak saying guy appears! Jeanette seethes with rage. Jazz must calm down her narc rage. He got called an “it’ once. BULLYING!!
44. SLUMBER PARTY TIME!! Jeanette only allows those whose parents are in line to come over to their house, or Jazz to their house.
45. Once again, boobs comes up. Jesus christ.
46. Jazz laments on how no guys are attracted to him, because it’s gay. “Is it because of my penis or am I just ugly?” One of the girls “All guys care about is boobs and butt.” Another girl “All the popular girls have boobs and butt.”
47. Greg and Jeanette have dinner with the crypt keepers. Jeanette sweats over Jazz’s testosterone levels. “This is fresh. We’re the guinea pigs. JAZZ IS A GUINEA PIG!” Yup, straight from the evil whorebitch herself. Oh, but she catches herself. “I don’t like to think of it that way.” Then Greg sternly says “I don’t know why you said that.” Let’s just forget we ever said that, but TLC certainly didn’t want to! It makes Jeanette’s stomach churn thinking about what she’s forcing her child through. Don’t worry though, she has yet to bring up SRS with Jazz, so she’s a good mom! Hah, just kidding, Jeanette just doesn’t want to deal with that yet. She brags about a friend of Jazz who got butchered at age 16. Who the fuck could that be? Crypt keepers are horrified by this. Jeanette doubles down. Grandma says something cryptic that shows how they’re kind of detached from all this. It’s clear the grandparents do not like this shit. Gramps assure they’re just so proud of how Jeanette has handled this. They do not look convincing when he says this.
48. I’ve just noticed, Greg barely talks in this episode.
49. Doctor time! Jazz wants to talk to the doctor about getting more boobs. Jazz wants big boobs, because then people will finally see him as a real woman! People clearly use boobs as to ascertain whether someone is male or female. Jeanette wonders if he’ll inherit her boobs, and Jazz mocks how saggy they are.
50. Remember that dream that Jazz had about mustaches and beards? Jeanette basically confirms that’s her own fear. HMMM….
51. Creepy doctor, OMG HIS NAME IS DR. CHARLTON!! He brings up how they suppressed Jazz from gaining a mustache. (What is with boobs and mustaches in this fucking episode?) Jeanette apparently had to doctor shop to find a doctor willing to medically experiment on Jazz. And of course, doctor has to ask about any changes in boob growth, and Jazz laments how he’s the second smallest of his friends.
52. Lab results. Zero sign of male puberty! YAY! WE’RE BLOCKED!! NO MUSTACHES OR BEARDS!! Jeanette is relieved that Jazz’s testosterone levels are so low. Now he’ll definitely fit in with the other teenage girls!
53. Jeanette’s is convinced that Jazz would kill himself if he went through male puberty.
54. Estrogen is low for an ADULT FEMALE. Uh, isn’t Jazz a teenager? Why should he have the same estrogen levels as an adult woman? Oh, they’re even low for a girl his age. But don’t worry, the fact Jazz is still seeing breast growth means his body is still reacting to the estrogen. And they talk about dosage, being sure to mention breast development, BREAST WILL GET BIGGER IF WE PUT MORE ESTROGEN IN YOU!! But your height might be stunted.
55. Jazz thinks it’s unfair his friends don’t ever have to think of their estrogen levels and they just get the boobs and body perfectly the way they want. WUT.
56. Jazz is willing to be patient and not pump up the estrogen, cause he’ll magically get a perfect female body, somehow, oh and he doesn’t want to be short. Jeanette helpfully chimes in “There’s always breast implants!”
57. Surgery talk. Boob implants on trannies is just top surgery, and then they go to bottom surgery. Jazz does not look excited. Not 100% sure if he wants bottom surgery, but he doesn’t want to die a virgin.
58. Cut to Jeanette and Greg in their bedroom. Jeanette laments on how much she has to go through blah blah blah, WTF, they talk about bottom surgery, and Jeanette says Jazz is going to be 15, which is much closer to 18 than when Jazz was 9,10, 11. Clearly, she doesn’t want to be outdone by that 16 troon who got SRS. Jazz is sometimes fine, and sometimes not, but Jazz doesn’t elaborate to Jeanette about it, but Jazz is already feeling overwhelmed. Blah blah blah, I wish she could just be, boo hoo, so strong, Greg comforts her.
THE END.
2. Jeanette asks Jazz to cut onions and he declines. Sander and Griffin are kicking a soccer ball sadly to each other, relegated to the outdoors lest they distract Jeanette away from golden child.
3. They are allowed in once Greg arrives with pizza and wings. No idea why Jeanette was chopping onions if she wasn’t cooking.
4. Jeanette is introduced first, then she introduces Greg. It’s clear on who wears the pants of this family! Then she blathers on about how they met and blah blah blah. Oh wait, Jeanette is older than Greg!! He used to “play” with her brother but didn’t want to hang out with her.
5. Greg: “Jeanette was the older girl next door and I DID WANT TO PLAY WITH HER!!” Weird relationship dynamics there, especially since they’re only a year apart or so.
6. They apparently have to eat the pizza and wings out doors, Ari dares to sit down next to Jeanette, and Greg tells her to move, Ari says the other chair is wet but yet still has to move to it. One of the twins tells her to suck it up as she’s only there for a couple of days (I think it’s Sander, but I don’t give a shit about the twins, so whatever)
7. Jeanette: “I’m a MOM of FOUR wonderful children!” Clearly has issues of Ari moved out of the house and away from her control. Does a forced toast, then warns the twins when they move out for college and visit home for spring break they’ll see it’s not the same. (this might be why they hardly visit now)
8. Greg says you’ll hear Griffin whistling around the house, and Sander will be looking at himself in a mirror. OMFG, this is hilarious. The parents think so too, “LOL looking at himself in the mirror!”
9. They ask Ari about her hardest class, which is math. They then immediately ask Jazz what math class he’s taking which is geometry. Wow, way to put down Ari. I think they realize how mean that way, cause it immediately cuts to a different dynamic, where the twins try to divert away from that subtle put down.
10. Cue to Jazz being born, and Grandma Cross Eyes lets everyone know “That’s a boy for sure!”
11. Jeanette forces the family to praise Jazz “Wasn’t she the cutest little thing?” Sander, I think, replies “Now you’ve grown up into a nice blossoming big girl now!” …..I don’t think that’s an appropriate for a brother to say to a sister. But then again, I wasn’t raised in a fucked up family.
12. Cue to praising Jazz. Jeanette reminds Ari used to hold Jazz like it was Ari’s own baby. AND ARI DROPPED JAZZ AS A BABY!! But don’t worry, it’s just runs in the family, as Greg also dropped Ari as a baby.
13. TLC seems to want to get the fuck out of this, so cue Ari saying Jazz always gravitated to girly things. He wore my stuff, so clearly, he was a girl.
14. Greg was in denial. Just a passing phase. AH! We get to the part where Jeanette was on a computer and Jazz goes into the whole “when’s the good fairy gonna wave her wand and change my penis into a vagina?” Like, how does a kid like that ever see a vagina and fixate on it? Are the family secret nudists? Sexual abuse? No normal kids says this. “I was so confused my two year old was speaking like an adult!!”
15. Jeanette freaks out like OMG MY KID IS NOT NORMAL!! what do to, what to do...DOCTOR TIME!!
16. Jazz: Doctor held up two dolls. One was a girl and had girl parts (WTF kind of dolls are they making with genitalia for kids!?) the other way a boy and had boy parts.
17. Doctor: Which genitalia do you have right now? WTF kind of doctor/therapist asks that goddamn question? Then “Which do you want?” The obsession with genitalia in three year olds is not normal and begs the question of what are they being exposed to/having done to them? Jazz: points to girl doll
18. “I have a girl brain in a boy body. I think like a girl, but I...but I just have a boy body.”
19. Jeanette pretends that losing her little boy was hard and she was just so distraught. She forced Jazz to go to school dressed as a boy, but only because the school was filled with bigots!! Jazz needs to be affirmed by mommy putting two pigtails in his hair. Jeanette just gets so emotional over emasculating her son.
20. Twins want to go to the beach, Jazz wants to go too. It’s very subtle, but twins are passive aggressive, as they clearly don’t want to have to include Jazz.
21. BATHING SUIT SHOPPING TIME!! With Ari of course.
22. Oh noes, Jazz is not a little girl anymore!! HIGH SCHOOL!!
23. Jeanette tells the kids she never wants them to grow up and leave her. Greg pouts “You don’t want to be alone with me?” Jeanette never answers. Lmao
24. Jazz and Ari driving to get bathing suits. Blah blah blah, goes into the origins of Jazz’s name. Jazz pesters Ari about her high school appearance, and apparently thinks she was antisocial, and Ari was like, I had a boyfriend?
25. Grandma Cross Eyes and Grandpa show up to have tea with Jeanette and so she can talk about Jazz going to the doctor.b
26. Grandma Cross Eyes was devastated by Jeanette trooning out Jazz, while Grandpa looks down at the floor as though in shame. They had no one to talk to about this, so went to a professional. Wonder if Jeanette told them who to go see. Grandpa is flabbergasted of his grandson being dressed like a girl. So he decides to educate himself and goes on the internet instead of seeking a therapist/psychiatrist.
27. Jeanette talks about the time she educated the pediatrician about Jazz, and yet they still had the audacity to ask, “So does she have a penis?” Jeanette says that everyone is always curious about Jazz’s genitals, and it’s the most common question people ask about him. But only because Jazz looks like a real girl.
28. Grandpa makes the grave mistake of saying “transgenders”, and Jeanette is quick to correct him on the proper term, while looking extremely smug and haughty. Grandpa “I’m learning the language from you, my dear.” omg, then Grandma Cross Eyes, since they’re being educated on what not to say, asks, “Not trannies?” ‘NO!” says Jeanette. Grandma Cross Eyes looks surprised, but with how wonky she looks anyway, who the fuck knows.
29. Grandma Cross Eyes states she’s from a generation that wasn’t plagued with trannies and crazy women medically experimenting on their kid, and “we’re still on this journey”.
30. Back to Ari and Jazz, still driving on the way to the bathing suit store. They talk of what kind of bathing suit to get, and Jazz thinks he’ll stick to tankinis, but Ari says not to limit himself because there could be like 1000 suits there!! Jazz says all the fat goes to him stomach (a harbinger of what’s to come). “Why can’t it go to my butt and my boobs!?!”
31. Jazz remembers a nightmare he had when he was 2 or 3 (who the fuck even remembers dreams from that age!?!) that giant mustaches and beards were chasing him around trying to attach to his face. Jazz wakes up and runs to Mommy Dearest, who promises, “Don’t worry, that’s never going to happen. I’LL NEVER LET IT HAPPEN TO YOU!” Hmm…
32. Back to Jeanette telling the crypt keepers Jazz’s doctor appointment. They talk about estrogen. Ew, Jeanette says that Jazz is developing nicely into a young lady. They talk about Jazz developing breasts. God, I’d feel creeped out if my mother told her parents about me growing boobs. “Her breasts are blossoming!” WHO SAYS THIS TO THEIR PARENTS ABOUT THEIR KIDS!?!
33. Jeanette admits transing Jazz is experimental stuff. “Like I am messing with my kids body.” Gram and Granps just nod and look checked out.
34. Finally Jazz and Ari are the bikini store. They choose the one store that doesn’t sell tankinis. Even if Jazz gets a bathing suit, he still has to wear something over the bottoms lest people see his bulge.
35.Jazz comes out in a one piece and skirt, doesn’t like how low cut it is, then pushes his moobs together. Ari, “No you don’t have to do that.” Ari reassures Jazz she can see the formation of his moobs, and he’s not completely flat. Jazz laments he had to grow his breasts with estrogen.
36. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are going go the beach. Jazz is wearing his new bikini, complete with a cover up top and skirt.
37. Griffin is single and Sander had a girlfriend one time but they had complications, probably because he’s an annoying, insufferable douche. He’s single but taken, whTatever that means.
38. OMG, literally everyone in this fucking family talks about Jazz’s boobs. Goddamn, that is some sort of emotional incest shit.
39. The twins talk about Jazz’s lack of male suitors. Now WTF they tell Jazz “guys shouldn’t care about your boobs”. They talk about Jazz dating, and that they’re going to interrogate the poor dude who wants to date Jazz. Make sure he’s perfect. O.o
40. Beach time. They kick a volleyball around and it’s so sad to see how athletic Jazz used to be. :[
41. Make up shopping time, but only just Jeanette and Jazz of course. She sure does love to be there when she emasculates him. Jeanette scolds Jazz for using a brush, but then herself breaks a sample lipstick. LMFAO, some fag asks them if they need help, and Jazz wants a full makeover, then tells Jeanette she needs one too. Jeanette states she’s already wearing make up (lmao) and Jazz tells her at least she doesn’t look orange today. Oh burn, he tells “you have days when you look like an Oompa Loompa.” But it’s everyone elses fault for not telling her she looks like one before she goes out. Jeanette is makeup whore.
42. Jazz doesn’t seem to be into makeup and states a lot of girls don’t wear makeup. Jeanette gaslights him and tells him she sees A LOT of girls wearing makeup.
43. Jeanette and Jazz go to some restaurant. Jeanette admits Jazz is not little anymore. Jazz takes it to her calling him fat. HMMMMM….The tranny freak saying guy appears! Jeanette seethes with rage. Jazz must calm down her narc rage. He got called an “it’ once. BULLYING!!
44. SLUMBER PARTY TIME!! Jeanette only allows those whose parents are in line to come over to their house, or Jazz to their house.
45. Once again, boobs comes up. Jesus christ.
46. Jazz laments on how no guys are attracted to him, because it’s gay. “Is it because of my penis or am I just ugly?” One of the girls “All guys care about is boobs and butt.” Another girl “All the popular girls have boobs and butt.”
47. Greg and Jeanette have dinner with the crypt keepers. Jeanette sweats over Jazz’s testosterone levels. “This is fresh. We’re the guinea pigs. JAZZ IS A GUINEA PIG!” Yup, straight from the evil whorebitch herself. Oh, but she catches herself. “I don’t like to think of it that way.” Then Greg sternly says “I don’t know why you said that.” Let’s just forget we ever said that, but TLC certainly didn’t want to! It makes Jeanette’s stomach churn thinking about what she’s forcing her child through. Don’t worry though, she has yet to bring up SRS with Jazz, so she’s a good mom! Hah, just kidding, Jeanette just doesn’t want to deal with that yet. She brags about a friend of Jazz who got butchered at age 16. Who the fuck could that be? Crypt keepers are horrified by this. Jeanette doubles down. Grandma says something cryptic that shows how they’re kind of detached from all this. It’s clear the grandparents do not like this shit. Gramps assure they’re just so proud of how Jeanette has handled this. They do not look convincing when he says this.
48. I’ve just noticed, Greg barely talks in this episode.
49. Doctor time! Jazz wants to talk to the doctor about getting more boobs. Jazz wants big boobs, because then people will finally see him as a real woman! People clearly use boobs as to ascertain whether someone is male or female. Jeanette wonders if he’ll inherit her boobs, and Jazz mocks how saggy they are.
50. Remember that dream that Jazz had about mustaches and beards? Jeanette basically confirms that’s her own fear. HMMM….
51. Creepy doctor, OMG HIS NAME IS DR. CHARLTON!! He brings up how they suppressed Jazz from gaining a mustache. (What is with boobs and mustaches in this fucking episode?) Jeanette apparently had to doctor shop to find a doctor willing to medically experiment on Jazz. And of course, doctor has to ask about any changes in boob growth, and Jazz laments how he’s the second smallest of his friends.
52. Lab results. Zero sign of male puberty! YAY! WE’RE BLOCKED!! NO MUSTACHES OR BEARDS!! Jeanette is relieved that Jazz’s testosterone levels are so low. Now he’ll definitely fit in with the other teenage girls!
53. Jeanette’s is convinced that Jazz would kill himself if he went through male puberty.
54. Estrogen is low for an ADULT FEMALE. Uh, isn’t Jazz a teenager? Why should he have the same estrogen levels as an adult woman? Oh, they’re even low for a girl his age. But don’t worry, the fact Jazz is still seeing breast growth means his body is still reacting to the estrogen. And they talk about dosage, being sure to mention breast development, BREAST WILL GET BIGGER IF WE PUT MORE ESTROGEN IN YOU!! But your height might be stunted.
55. Jazz thinks it’s unfair his friends don’t ever have to think of their estrogen levels and they just get the boobs and body perfectly the way they want. WUT.
56. Jazz is willing to be patient and not pump up the estrogen, cause he’ll magically get a perfect female body, somehow, oh and he doesn’t want to be short. Jeanette helpfully chimes in “There’s always breast implants!”
57. Surgery talk. Boob implants on trannies is just top surgery, and then they go to bottom surgery. Jazz does not look excited. Not 100% sure if he wants bottom surgery, but he doesn’t want to die a virgin.
58. Cut to Jeanette and Greg in their bedroom. Jeanette laments on how much she has to go through blah blah blah, WTF, they talk about bottom surgery, and Jeanette says Jazz is going to be 15, which is much closer to 18 than when Jazz was 9,10, 11. Clearly, she doesn’t want to be outdone by that 16 troon who got SRS. Jazz is sometimes fine, and sometimes not, but Jazz doesn’t elaborate to Jeanette about it, but Jazz is already feeling overwhelmed. Blah blah blah, I wish she could just be, boo hoo, so strong, Greg comforts her.
THE END.
The recaps of other episodes will not be this long, but I just wanted to highlight how fucked up the very first episode was, and how much it forewarned of what was to come.
ETA: I played the drinking game watching this episode, which is why so many typos and grammar mishaps.
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