🗑️ Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[Truly Rural]

Just popping into this part of the forum to see the shitshow, hi. So on the whole travelers insurance thing for a Visa. I don't know if it's changed recently. But Americans don't need a Visa at all to visit the EU for 3 months or less. Just passport and a plane ticket. So yeah, probably no insurance.

I don't know if it's requirement. I also don't need Visa, I'd just get it because it's responsible thing to do, and is so cheap it would be irrational to not get it at such low price. I don't know, maybe it's expensive for obese Americans. But yeah I was never asked for proof of it myself.

 

[RodgerDodger]

I for one can't wait for the Gunt World Tour to reach Istanbul.

 

[Manwithn0n0men]

He's also going to be in a lot of pain for a long time, and quite possibly forever. This is the kind of injury that you get twinges from years or even decades later (not that the pig will live that long). This is the kind of shit you get traumatic migraines and cluster headaches from. That's assuming he doesn't have even more hellish sequelae like for instance if he got his trigeminal nerve fucked up. And then there are minor but still atrociously annoying things like cerebrospinal fluid dripping out of your nose.

Head injuries really fuck you up even if the massive amount of cushioning you have there usually protects you from actual traumatic brain injury.

The Gunt is going to be suffering so long.

Am I a bad person that I can't stop laughing?

Also this will increase his odds of developing dementia later in life

 

[Tommy's Mom]

It's hard to tell, he's being tight lipped for the first time in his life - his teeth might be all fucked up after all...

He definitely lost a couple of teeth, but if we're lucky, he got a few teeth broken as well. I had a tooth get chipped during a fight when I was a kid, and that mother fucker was the most painful shit I ever experienced until I got it fixed. Every time my tongue would even lightly brush up against the chipped area, it would shoot lightning bolts of pure agony straight into my brain. I wouldn't wish that shit on my worst enemy, but I would wish it upon The Gunt. That should be an indicator of how truly awful he is.

 

[Hüftpriester]

Not at all. It's hilarious because all of this could have been avoided if he wasn't such a petty, shallow, desperate subhuman.

Not only that but he was seriously on the fence about taking this trip at all after Dick had his "injury". Literally the only reason he went was so we wouldn't laugh at him for being a bitch afraid to travel alone.

 

[MelloYello]

Put your fucking mouth on the curb, wigger!

 

[TakeSoma]

I'm Portuguese, so take this with a pinch of salt, virtue signalling my own country, butthurt, Reditor moment, whatever the fuck.

Ralph was beaten pretty badly and sustained some possible serious injuries. He does have my sympathy for that: no one deserves to be robbed and beaten badly.

Portugal is ranked 3rd as the safest country in the World (as of 2021), whatever that means. I've traveled around the World and have been robbed all around (including Vegas, NY and San Francisco). Granted, I've lived in Lisbon for 20 years and have been robbed there also. But, whatever the location, I've never been mauled the way Ralph was.

Like I said, whatever was is attitude towards it, no one deserves to be robbed and beaten, even if he was drunk. But we know some people can be pretty fucked up, so we need to apply some common sense to the situations that are presented to us. If you're getting jumped by "some guy and his friends" - specially on a foreign country, unarmed, and unless you're fucking Khabib Nurmagomedov, you don't put up a fight.

Ralph, I'm sorry you got robbed and beaten up, no one deserves that, and hope you'll get better ASAP. But next time don't try to pull a Ralph Male attitude towards it. Live to fight another day.

 

[draggs]

You're confused mate. Null was talking about South Sudan, not Brazil.

How about Venezuela

They really love fat guys flashing money down there

 

[Slimy Time]

That's why I think he got an extended session of the boots, it isn't easy to break an orbital bone with fists

I think I have footage of what happened to Ralph.

 

[CognitiveDeficiency]

Experiencing schadenfreude always makes me feel guilty and like a bad Christian.

Except when it comes to the gunt.

 

[Hüftpriester]

no one deserves to be robbed and beaten badly.

Ralph 100% deserved to get his ass beat.

Little doggy has been barking a lot the past few years. Now he won't be able to bite anything other than mashed potatoes and applesauce for the foreseeable future.

 

[Herpes Complex]

Only the Ralpamale could take a otherwise bland, disappointing "vacation" and spice it up with random violence.

 

[Tommy's Mom]

He does have my sympathy for that: no one deserves to be robbed and beaten badly.

I admire your sense of humanity, but it doesn't apply here. This is Ethan Ralph we are talking about. Do you cry for the pig every time you're about to eat a piece of bacon? I didn't think so.

 

[Banana Hammock]

Plot twist: Ralph intentionally got mugged so he could get rid of his man-purse without having to take the L and admit that it's gay.

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

I don't know about Portugal specifically but in many civilized countries if you show up at a hospital obviously the victim of extreme violence they will quite often call the cops themselves. This is usually mandatory if it's something like a gunshot or in many places a stabbing, but even just a physical beating this severe, requiring surgery, might be a mandatory reporting thing there.

He obviously didn't take himself to the hospital in that condition. Someone called la ambulancia and I'm betting it was the po-po who responded to a call of their own.

 

[Manwithn0n0men]

Only the Ralpamale could take a otherwise bland, disappointing "vacation" and spice it up with random violence.

I mean the confrence he does with Fuentes....does he get Fuentes to admit he is a Glower on the killstream?

 

[Telemeter]

Portugal is ranked 3rd as the safest country in the World (as of 2021), whatever that means. I've traveled around the World and have been robbed all around (including Vegas, NY and San Francisco). Granted, I've lived in Lisbon for 20 years and have been robbed there also. But, whatever the location, I've never been mauled the way Ralph was.

That's why the mugging is hard to believe, muggers are there to take stuff, not beat you to death, even if you "chase them down", as Ralph obviously can't do to anyone who is not on a wheelchair.

It's much more likely that he simply picked up a fight with some random woman (something he literally has a criminal history for, even Rekieta told a story about Ralph picking fights with women in Miami) and got the ever loving shit beaten out of him by her boyfriend.

There clearly was some passion in whoever did this to him, it wasn't just a "we haven't filled our quota of half-dead wiggers today" kind of situation.

 

[Turbocuck]

I'm Portuguese, so take this with a pinch of salt, virtue signalling my own country, butthurt, Reditor moment, whatever the fuck.

Ralph was beaten pretty badly and sustained some possible serious injuries. He does have my sympathy for that: no one deserves to be robbed and beaten badly.

Portugal is ranked 3rd as the safest country in the World (as of 2021), whatever that means. I've traveled around the World and have been robbed all around (including Vegas, NY and San Francisco). Granted, I've lived in Lisbon for 20 years and have been robbed there also. But, whatever the location, I've never been mauled the way Ralph was.

Like I said, whatever was is attitude towards it, no one deserves to be robbed and beaten, even if he was drunk. But we know some people can be pretty fucked up, so we need to apply some common sense to the situations that are presented to us. If you're getting jumped by "some guy and his friends" - specially on a foreign country, unarmed, and unless you're fucking Khabib Nurmagomedov, you don't put up a fight.

Ralph, I'm sorry you got robbed and beaten up, no one deserves that, and hope you'll get better ASAP. But next time don't try to pull a Ralph Male attitude towards it. Live to fight another day.

I have also traveled a fair bit and one of the first pieces of advice I was given as a tourist is that if you get pickpocketed, you never chase the gypsy because he will always run to some blind alleyway where a pack of them will be waiting to kick the shit out of you.

You're right, nobody deserves to get a brain injury for a stupid mistake, but if the official narrative is true, it just shows how naive Ralph is.

 

[Pres. Benjamin Franklin]

the Burgomaster of Portugal has proven himself worthy of that crown

 

[Mexican Molotov Marauder]

The real truth is, Ralph wasn't beaten up by a bunch of gypsies. No, in reality, it was done by a vicious flock of pigeons expertly disguised as portugese thugs. You see, Ralph can talk mad shit all day long on a different continent, but when he landed in europe, he entered Josh's neighborhood, his garden if you will. Every good balcony farmer knows that you gotta keep your garden tidy, otherwise pests will destroy your crops. So when he heard that a big fat aphid waddled off a plane in Portugal, the Birdfather sent his capos to do some pest control.

In all seriousness, I fully expected the Portugal trip to be a more expensive, more stupid but just as boring version of the Vegas trips. You know, dumb selfies of him posing with grossly overpriced food and general wiggetry, slapfights on twitter while holed up in his hotel room and just in general a sad, pathetic, boring snoozefest. Really, the Vegas trips are really only interesting in that they are his cope and I thought for sure this trip would be the same. A boring waste of money, that's only interesting in that it lets us peek behind the curtains of his psyche a little bit. Sure, the dumbass getting his shit pushed in was not only always an option, but pretty much an inevitability due to his attitude. For some reason I always expected he would get beaten bloody on american soil, but his being stuck in a portugese hospital for weeks is just as funny.