🗑️ Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[MuuMuu Bunnylips]

The real question is, did he bleed blood or melted butter?

 

[Banks Davenport]

So he needs to recover from the orbital surgery for a week, but will he need to wait even longer before getting on an airplane? I know you can't fly on a plane without any kind of broken nose or orbital issue because you could die.

 

[NSA]

This is the worst beating the Gunt has taken since he lost that fight with a female police officer.

 

[Telemeter]

Depends on what really happend.

We've made fun of Portugal a lot, but a tourist getting punched almost to death is not THAT common that it goes unnoticed.

Scammed yes. Left for dead? That gets reported even in Mexico where it does happen all the time.

The only way this didn't get to the police is if Ralph picked a fight with some rando who didn't bother pressing charges or took off after me helped Ralph find out.

If Ralph really was the victim there has to be a report somewhere, I doubt a story of a gunted midget bravely chasing robbers is enough to get traveler's insurance to kick in.

 

[Empresa]

The resemblance is uncanny , Airsoft Ralphy

 

[free_protons4u]

If Ralph really was the victim there has to be a report somewhere, I doubt a story of a gunted midget bravely chasing robbers is enough to get traveler's insurance to kick in.

My friend, there is a 0% chance Ralph has traveler's insurance.

 

[Ghostface Killer]

i’m just so curious how much shit he’ll talk going forward and threatening figthts.

He will be hollerin’ and hoopin’ about fucking someone up next week live on air when he scorch earths both Dick and Jim for making fun of his ass. Screencap it.

 

[Truly Rural]

Have to call bullshit on this one. No tourist gets non-emergency surgery overseas without travel insurance.

Turns out the EU requires it for a visa:

• a travel medical insurance covering emergency medical, hospitalisation and repatriation (including in case of death). The minimum cover should be of 30.000 EUR. This insurance must be valid for the entire Schengen area and throughout the duration of the stay.

Required documents

Learn which documents are required to apply for the Schengen visa.

ec.europa.eu

Exactly this, and it's dirt cheap. I was getting 30k insurance when ever I'd travel around Europe, except I never had the need to draw on it. That's why I said that now is the best of times for Gunt to have a heart attack to get most out of the insurance he bought. Now with regard to his injury, in medicine every injury to the head is considered serious, pimple on the face is considered potentially serious.

Spoiler: Irelevant power leveling

2 years ago my father fell face down and ended up with 5 fractures on his left cheek bone. I expected surgery would be difficult and long, but somehow he was under for measly 15 minutes, and when he woke up he had smallest bandage ever, it was the size of a half LSD tab (Sorry I can't think of a better example LOL) I was blown away. Now I don't know if Gunt's case is for maxillofacial surgery or some other department, and it ain't same as in my example, but surgeons are skilled beyond comprehension in this day and age, almost as unbelievable as a steep street.

Have fun going under Gunt, you might get spiritual experience if you are lucky!

 

[Tridgeridoo]

 

[AnOminous]

I would be very surprised if there’s a police report at all because of your first sentence. Tourists who get into trouble buying drugs, fucking prostitutes of dubious age, etc. are targets for robbery because they can’t go to the cops.

I don't know about Portugal specifically but in many civilized countries if you show up at a hospital obviously the victim of extreme violence they will quite often call the cops themselves. This is usually mandatory if it's something like a gunshot or in many places a stabbing, but even just a physical beating this severe, requiring surgery, might be a mandatory reporting thing there.

 

[Haint]

1. It's going to be a week or two before he can go home.
2. Orbital surgery will require further weeks of healing.
3. Dentures will take weeks to prepare and get used to.
4. Even more weeks if he does vain reconstructive surgery.

The killstream might be down for months.

All of that. Just to in the name of spite.
Karma is a bad, bad bitch.

Get well soon and get back to your loving mare of a wife, you sad excuse of a father.

Bless your heart, Ralph. Bless your heart.

 

[Marissa Moira]

View attachment 2926175

He was mugged by Moors/Gypsies not Chinese.

 

[Manwithn0n0men]

He needed health insurance for his Visa, is that generally rolled in with travel insurance in the USofA? Whenever I deal with it is generally is.

If it is, why didn't he just do the sensible thing, take the loss, get a police report number and claim away.

This not rocket science. Also what the hell is he doing as a foreign national fighting in another country, one allegation that you were the aggressor (regardless of fact) can get you embroiled in another countries legal system and may lead to you having to defend yourself.

You sound like some one who has never listened to the Ralph Retort.

Ethan does not have that level of cognitive development

 

[mindlessobserver]

I doubt it. Its not like ralph has health insurance lol.

Lets hope he was smart enough to check the box for travelers insurance when he bought his tickets from Expedia or wherever. It adds like 50 bucks to the bill but holy shit you do not want to be in the situation Gunt is in overseas and not have it. Contrary to belief in America, Healthcare in Europe is NOT Free. Ralph is not a citizen so he's not paid any taxes which means he's not part of any national health plan there. Papa Portugal is gonna want his money back.

 

[Tiger Jack]

Just think:

On top of everything else, he's probably also going to get Covid.

 

[AnOminous]

I doubt it. Its not like ralph has health insurance lol.

Ironically the traveler's insurance he had to get to get a visa probably covers him better than what he has back at home. Unless he somehow skirted that legal requirement, which wouldn't be shocking for Gunty.

 

[Fareal]

For srs though, this is the sort of incident that leaves even normal, well adjusted people pretty mindblown for a bit. An unexpected, unprovoked* beating bad enough to leave you needing reconstructive facial surgery, when you're alone and abroad in a country where you don't speak the language, is a legit traumatic event. I think even gunt will be surprised how long it takes him to get on the level and process what happened here.

*we know he did something to provoke it but he is legit so stupid that he probably didn't understand how badly the situation was escalating and how likely he was to get his face pushed in, so the kicks to the head were a real surprise

 

[Retink]

yeah, you really do have to go some to get targetted, granted im not an american with an automatic target on my back, but I remember one time in Spain where Id fucked up my knee because I slipped while drunk and was hopping back to the hotel, some dealers tried to get me to buy some shit, I explained that I wasnt really in the mood because my leg hurt, and they ended helping me back to the hotel which was only 500 metres or so away.

Worked out well, because I did end up buying some stuff off them the next night and it was decent, so that was great customer service from them, the point being you have to be real obnoxious to get your ass beat.

Hopefully we learn what actually happened because knowing Ralph he probably did something really fucked up.

 

[mindlessobserver]

Ironically the traveler's insurance he had to get to get a visa probably covers him better than what he has back at home. Unless he somehow skirted that legal requirement, which wouldn't be shocking for Gunty.

I wonder how stringently the airlines and portugal enforce it? Is it an honor system? Those times I have had to fly to the UK, nobody ever asked if I had travelers insurance or not. I just always made sure I did because I am not a retard.

 

[Telemeter]

My friend, there is a 0% chance Ralph has traveler's insurance.

Nah, airlines and places like expedia let you purchase traveler's insurance for like $20 on checkout, it's also a perk on a lot of credit cards and as some people mentioned in this thread it might be a requirement just to get into the country since the wuflu started. Its neither that hard nor expensive to get, but it still requires official proof of whatever event occurred before you can use it.