🗑️ Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

[NPC304348]

What if Sergio was an informant to the thieves that felted Ralph hahaha what a timeline

i was thinking the same thing. where was sergio when all of this was going down? someone else took that picture of him sitting in the bar prior to his beatdown. had to be sergio right? so he was with him up until he got his ass kicked? we need to hear from sergio

 

[hawkisnight]

Quite, Im pretty sure if I was retarded I could get the same thing happen to me in New York or any american city.

I have to say from watching irl streamers they rarely get what they deserve in american cities despite how much a menace they are.

 

[No. 7 cat]

I’d like to see Ralph on a donkey while he’s in Spain or Pakistan. I’m sure they keep a sturdy one just for American tourists. Plz make this happen, Sergio the twink escort or whoever is protecting Gunter abroad. I need that photo op to go with the shrimp cock. mess.

RIP dunkey. Nothing less than an ox.

 

[Lifeguard Hermit]

You might not be able to abort the retort but someone figured out that you can abaolutely deface the face

 

[instythot]

Tbh I'm not sure why the "4 on 1" scenario is deemed so unbelievable. Gypsies tend to roam in packs in most settings anyway, and I could very easily see him getting jumped by four lanky Roma teens that absolutely know that no man with a purse is a challenge.

Will say, the lack of being stabbed is a bit odd though, but maybe the Portuguese breed have different preferences from the usual. Or they took pity on him after kicking his teeth in and realizing he'd never catch them. I do know that he would absolutely be dead if he was making eyes at one of their sisters.

Because ethan is full of shit, likes to act like a big man and showed us that he began his foreign adventure by eating fucking burger king. He's not going anywhere where there are unfamiliar sights unless there are kiddie hookers or drugs and only then for exactly as long as it takes to complete the transaction

Most likely, the other tenants of his guest house got fed up with a hollerin pig fucking up their vacation

 

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the Gunt becomes the violent one

 

[McSchlomo]

I hope he comes to germany next time so he can get his ass kicked by syrians. Oh gunt, you have so much to DO still, do not die on us.

 

[NotFatChild]

Sorry but I refuse to believe fatboy chased anyone down. I wonder what actually happened.

 

[Disheveled Human]

The same shit would happen to Ralph if he left the “tourist area” of any city in America drunk off his ass at night and alone trying to score drugs or whores

Ok thats fine fair but add in a language barrier on top. Don't act like that isn't going to contribute to getting robbed either not knowing the language or speaking a secondary one less understood puts you in a worse position when dealing with people who want to fuck with you.

 

[Terra Pax]

Tbh I'm not sure why the "4 on 1" scenario is deemed so unbelievable. Gypsies tend to roam in packs in most settings anyway, and I could very easily see him getting jumped by four lanky Roma teens that absolutely know that no man with a purse is a challenge.

Because everything about his post is designed to make him seem tougher. He had his purse-snatched and decided to give chase, successfully it appears because he made it back to the robber and his three other friends.

Not only did he manage to fight them "by myself", which obvious from context but had to be stated. But he also managed to fight "Well past the point that is considered normal".

I do find it slightly uncharitable to be talking about 14 year old hookers (in any event its Lisbon, not El Salvador) but he was probably drunk, maybe a bit lost, and was a target of opportunity.

Also its hilarious.

 

[w4vy_gr4vy]

Oh my fucking sides! Gonna need a tree full of lemons to take the smile off my face. Couldn't happer to a nicer guy

 

[Nate Scully 025]

God, I literally stopped following this thread because it was starting to get sorta dull, and wake up to this. What a legitimate treat, lol.

Feels oddly poetic that the man who embodies almost all of the seven sins and was grifting from well meaning but naive Christians was beaten up and had all his shit stolen in a country with a long and storied Catholic history. Really makes you think, doesn’t it?

 

[SevenEightNine]

RIP dunkey. Nothing less than an ox.

This horse beat up Ralph once it recovered. How could you wish such a fate on the cutest of équines, the donkey?

 

[Optavia Sales Rep]

Most grown men (in my experience) don't do that many blows to the face. Looks and sounds like more like Ralph got his ass kicked by a group of teenagers because he did something stupid like grab their kid sister's ass.
Conversely, Ralph does have a very punchable face so maybe the face shots were unavoidable.

 

[Bell Peppers and Beef]

I'm surprised that none of you mentioned this yet, but whatever.

Is there a Portuguese equivalent to "Sooie, piggy piggy piggy!!"?

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

View attachment 2925482

https://twitter.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1486701078208987136

Ethan Ralph on Twitter: "They are NOT stingy with painkillers here in…

archived 27 Jan 2022 14:12:17 UTC

archive.ph

It is a shame the RalphaHorse will be born to a father who will still be slurring and constantly hangry for Oxyberries due to their father's injuries from their trip to Lisbon. I think Ralph was even going sober for a while, replacing his substance & drinking abuse with gambling and extra nicotine.

Hopefully Pantsu won't be kicked and punched too much as the cravings become unbearable. Also in case Ralph reads this, don't hit the stomach or Andy Warski won't be the only person with an abortion to their name.

See you broke dick farmers, Ralph is WINNING. He got his ass so severely beaten he’s getting lots of awesome pain killers from a hospital! Take that L Andy! Ralph’s on top of the world now buddy.

Pantsu is going to have so much fun with Ralph having a busted, broken face, being mercilessly memed and mocked while detoxing off painkillers. Oh, wait, what am I saying he will just start buying heroin when he gets back to Richmond.

The Kino Kasino results in Ralph spending thousands to get his face rearranged, robbed and another monkey on his back. Amazing really.

 

[metroid_fetish]

 

[Haint]

Number 1 rule of traveling into an unknown foreign city. Never travel alone. Always always use the buddy system. El Porco Gordo learned this the hard way.

 

[No Life Prince]

"Actually I guys I won because I'm a man and got in a fight, look at these scars! I'm a bad man, don't fuck with me, I'll take on 4 guys at once - on second thought, don't quote me on that. That pedophile Josh Moon would have been (Mutt's Law)."

Edit: Also is it me or are all spanish speaking countries cursed now. Not just the American ones but now the European ones as well.

 

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What if it was that Sergio guy? Lmao