- Joined
- Jul 9, 2014
YOUTUBE PROPHETS AND PREACHERS
Early on in the McKim thread, I got to thinking – "Bobby can't be the only one... There's got to be more youtube preachers of note out there, right?"
Oh yeah... BIG TIME.
Over the course of searching for the next Robert L McKim, I've been sorting through enough YT religious shit that I've set up a classification system, and thought I'd share some of the fruits of my findings.
I've broken this post up into two sections- you can peruse the background info (useful if you decide to go hunting yourself or want a lay of the land), or you can head straight to The Good Stuff.
The Good Stuff starts down here.
-Part One of Three- (I'm up against the media-limit)
"Terrifying Motherfuckers"
I've only found two so far, but I feel like there's got to be more out there. These folks have an air of mystery around them, and they spout out terrifying shit (to me, anyway).
If Servant of God doesn't really pierce your hardened sensibilities, than perhaps Near Life will?
People of Interest
These are folks I think are worth subscribing to, and mining through their libraries right away. I'll be monitoring these folks very closely, at least.
What about...
-Part Two of Three-
Last, and certainly not least among persons of interest, is Humble Helper!
Humble Helper has put out some really, really solid shit IMO. Consider: Satanic Snacks, Creepy Full Circle Brand...
...and Sick Credit Union Name, 1 + 2!
www.youtube.com
I hope she keeps putting out the hits, because I'm hungry for more.
www.youtube.com
Keep up the good work, Humble Helper- Because your shit is sick.
I also like Christmas is an Abomination and Satanic Police Symbol. Definitely looking forward to exploring her back-catalog for tasty nuggets.
CONCLUSION
Honestly, this was my first trawling expedition- I'm not the most technically-minded dude, so I get the feeling some of you people out there would do a much better job of finding this stuff than I have. I've already found more than I can reasonably go through, and I haven't even gotten around to exploring the leads I really want to chase down.
And it's turned up someone who might be a legit, virgin cow! I'm doing some research now, to see if she warrants her own thread- if not, I'll post her here.
What I'm saying is, I think this is just the tip of the iceberg, and there's no way I'm uncovering it all myself. I hope I've convinced some of you, to go fishing for Youtube Prophets & Preachers yourselves!
-END- Part Three of Three
Early on in the McKim thread, I got to thinking – "Bobby can't be the only one... There's got to be more youtube preachers of note out there, right?"
Oh yeah... BIG TIME.
Over the course of searching for the next Robert L McKim, I've been sorting through enough YT religious shit that I've set up a classification system, and thought I'd share some of the fruits of my findings.
I've broken this post up into two sections- you can peruse the background info (useful if you decide to go hunting yourself or want a lay of the land), or you can head straight to The Good Stuff.
When you search youtube for prophets, most of what you'll find is...
The Mini-Van Trash
If you go searching youtube for the good stuff, you're going to spend most of your time sorting through the Mini-Van Trash. There's too many examples to give, and very few of them are particularly noteworthy. But here's a YT channel that'll give you a tiny sense of the scope. The channel's called Harpazo Rapturo and it's someone that mostly collects end-time testimonies from YT, thus “proving” that the apocalypse is coming. I don't necessarily recommend watching any of it, but the number of videos they've collected is pretty staggering.
The channel description is pretty eccentric.
Vanilla with Crazy Sprinkles
This is another category of trash you'll sort through, but it's a lot harder to come to a snap judgment on. It can be relatively normal-seeming people, talking about extremely eccentric stuff- which unfortunately ends up being pretty boring. It also covers crazy motherfuckers, whose content is ultimately boring or indecipherable in unpleasant ways. Two classic examples are this video titled, “UFO's Are Very Demonic” and “Satanic Vatican: Eternal Sex or Eternal Angelic Life? Flight with an angel, real testimony!!!” Alternately boring, and boring and intellectually impenetrable. And not in a fun way.
Also worth mentioning here in the background section; A very common occurrence for almost all prolific youtube preachers & prophets, is that at some point in their ramblings, they'll stumble upon a topic that generates an inordinate amount of page views and subscribers.
For instance, Bob McKim generated 15k views when he talked about Jim Bakker, and 2k when he talked about Trump, whereas he averages 150-200 now that he's being watched by Kiwis, and he was getting 50-80ish before Kiwis showed up. It seems to me, this is how these folks pick up subscribers.
Endtimes777 is a Scottish(?) dude totally lacking in charisma (I've got him classified as Vanilla w/Sprinkles), and I got to wondering how in the fuck his channel got 1,000 subscribers. Well, in this video he talked about how True Jews are African and they control world banking, and it got him a whopping 77k views, while he's now getting around 50-100 these days. Actually his channel, sorted by popularity, is pretty enlightening and worth perusing, IMO. It's an interesting look into the collective subconscious of the YT religious.
The Mini-Van Trash
I call it that, because it seems like there's a huge genre of folks that skew 70/30 towards domestic-females, sharing their various religious testimonies, premonitions and visions – and their videos are boring trash. A lot of it's pretty innocent, with moms saying things like, “I was having X problem, when Y song came on the radio, and I felt like God was giving me a sign to do Z! Praise Him!” And nice Christian folks leaving each other messages like “thanks for sharing your Christian testimony” and stuff.
And some of it can get pretty dark- a lot of the dreams and prophecies portend The End-Times, and there's a fair-amount of commiserating about the degradation of morals in society, and The Rise of Homos and the latest, irrefutable sign of The Apocalypse.
Also some of it gets pretty feelsish. Abused women opening up, pretty women with sadness behind their eyes in dead marriages, and some twinges of mental illness.
Some of it's regular old preaching or bible study from individuals or small community churches. You'll find a lot of Sunday-services that were filmed and uploaded, for whatever reason.
And some of it can get pretty dark- a lot of the dreams and prophecies portend The End-Times, and there's a fair-amount of commiserating about the degradation of morals in society, and The Rise of Homos and the latest, irrefutable sign of The Apocalypse.
Also some of it gets pretty feelsish. Abused women opening up, pretty women with sadness behind their eyes in dead marriages, and some twinges of mental illness.
Some of it's regular old preaching or bible study from individuals or small community churches. You'll find a lot of Sunday-services that were filmed and uploaded, for whatever reason.
The channel description is pretty eccentric.
Is the rapture real? Yes, and the reason for this channel. Unless all prophecy is changed! There is enough evidence to show that it is coming and very soon. How soon? Could be days, weeks, months or years away. But even years may not be enough time to prepare. So start now. I am referring to spiritual preparation (repent and follow the laws - the only true salvation). You can pray to all the names of the Creator, Jesus Christ, Immanuel, Yahushua Ha Mashiach, the Holy Spirit, etc. and be saved from sin, no matter how evil you are or consider yourself to be. Even if you slip once or more, don't give up. Crying is inevitable and proof you are becoming human again, reborn if you will. You will cry for days, weeks or even months! This is normal, let the tears come. Christians scream "repent!" because they care. But repentance cannot be forced. This is the law of free will. Each person must choose. Pray, or ask other trustworthy persons to pray for you.
This is another category of trash you'll sort through, but it's a lot harder to come to a snap judgment on. It can be relatively normal-seeming people, talking about extremely eccentric stuff- which unfortunately ends up being pretty boring. It also covers crazy motherfuckers, whose content is ultimately boring or indecipherable in unpleasant ways. Two classic examples are this video titled, “UFO's Are Very Demonic” and “Satanic Vatican: Eternal Sex or Eternal Angelic Life? Flight with an angel, real testimony!!!” Alternately boring, and boring and intellectually impenetrable. And not in a fun way.
Also worth mentioning here in the background section; A very common occurrence for almost all prolific youtube preachers & prophets, is that at some point in their ramblings, they'll stumble upon a topic that generates an inordinate amount of page views and subscribers.
For instance, Bob McKim generated 15k views when he talked about Jim Bakker, and 2k when he talked about Trump, whereas he averages 150-200 now that he's being watched by Kiwis, and he was getting 50-80ish before Kiwis showed up. It seems to me, this is how these folks pick up subscribers.
Endtimes777 is a Scottish(?) dude totally lacking in charisma (I've got him classified as Vanilla w/Sprinkles), and I got to wondering how in the fuck his channel got 1,000 subscribers. Well, in this video he talked about how True Jews are African and they control world banking, and it got him a whopping 77k views, while he's now getting around 50-100 these days. Actually his channel, sorted by popularity, is pretty enlightening and worth perusing, IMO. It's an interesting look into the collective subconscious of the YT religious.
If you're interested... I have this guy down as Vanilla, but he's put out a fair amount of shit to go through.
http://www.endtimes.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/American_Beast.html
And be sure to check out his "about" page, with links to twitter and google+ and fb and stuff.
Here's some other stuff I've got classified as Van- but I'll point out, these are snap judgments, and I plan on re-examining them later.
Cast Out Spirits of Witchcraft!.
End Times America and Israel. I think this (crazy!) dude is in Egypt, but I'm not sure.
Satan Killing People. Love listening to her Jamaican accent, BTW.
Classic Vanilla. Boring and Baffling!
http://www.endtimes.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/American_Beast.html
And be sure to check out his "about" page, with links to twitter and google+ and fb and stuff.
Here's some other stuff I've got classified as Van- but I'll point out, these are snap judgments, and I plan on re-examining them later.
Cast Out Spirits of Witchcraft!.
End Times America and Israel. I think this (crazy!) dude is in Egypt, but I'm not sure.
Satan Killing People. Love listening to her Jamaican accent, BTW.
Classic Vanilla. Boring and Baffling!
The Good Stuff starts down here.
Sometimes you'll find some great videos from sources that are otherwise pretty unremarkable, for our purposes.
This guy's enthusiasm and commitment to the song is pretty admirable.
First two minutes of this video really crack me up- the seriousness of his tone, the way he's doing his best to ooze gravitas and authority... He's an intellectual, guys. And you gotta love how he dressed up for the camera.
Also, science was created by The Government to brain-wash teens into not believing in God. Even among the American Christian Crazies, the shit this kid talks really stands out to me. Scattered LOLs throughout, but I recommend the first 2m.
This might be one of my new favorite YT videos. If “My wooden badge was delicious!” is your kind of humor, then this might be right up your alley.
The best context I can give you, is that it's a Christian Church in Africa with up to FOUR HOUR worship sessions! I really, really want to know WTF “Cream your Dreams” is about, but in a way, not knowing is pretty fucking awesome too. Also, why in the fuck did they need to upload this shit to youtube? LOL
It's a marginal call putting Amanda Lynn into the 1-hit wonder category, as she's got a substantial library and an extremely strange mix of speech impediment, breathless delivery and strong regional accent. For the time I've got her down as a 1-hitter (as opposed to Vanilla Sprinkles), but there's a definite asterisk next to that classification. She's certainly worth keeping an eye on.
Also, LOL at how she pronounces, "Trafalgar Square."
AKA, Vanity Is Not a Sin
Spotlight JESUS! folks cross over a lot with Mini-Van Trash and One-Hit-Wonders- very similar ground. The difference, I feel, is that a lot of Trash and 1-HW's might be doing it for the greater good, but these folks are utterly transparent in their vanity. They're also more likely to put out 3-4 solid hit videos, rather than just one! Worth checking in on, once a month IMO.
This gal's not necessarily all that Lolzy...
How about Kendra Nauman? She's out there, doing the tough work. The Important Stuff, that often gets forgotten by otherwise well-meaning Christians.
www.youtube.com
Guess what? She's a dual threat! That's right, she gets prophetic visions!
www.youtube.com
Sounds a little butt-hurt here, don't you think? I don't think she handles criticism very well. Also, seems like she's a book-banning type! I don't like to make snap-judgments about folks, but I'm thinking she has way too much time and money on her hands. How many folks have the money and space for a dance studio in their house? Also, she's not that good- it's a hobby! She probably took 8 classes over 8 weeks, and then her husband spent $25k remodeling the man-cave to keep her quiet... Just a theory...
Also here's a friendly reminder! It's worthwhile checking in on the youtube comments for these videos! I've found some of these folks, by checking commenter's channel subscriptions! If they like Sheree (and really, who doesn't?), they probably like some other batshit stuff, too!
Spotlight JESUS! folks cross over a lot with Mini-Van Trash and One-Hit-Wonders- very similar ground. The difference, I feel, is that a lot of Trash and 1-HW's might be doing it for the greater good, but these folks are utterly transparent in their vanity. They're also more likely to put out 3-4 solid hit videos, rather than just one! Worth checking in on, once a month IMO.
Remember I said that kid had two hits? Well, this one's all about all about The Apocalypse, yo! Can you feel the Coming Darkness?
I wouldn't recommend watching more than 10-20s of this shit- you get the picture.
But I want to point her out as she hits so many of the notes I've been talking about up to this point- a domestic woman, vain for Jesus, a lot of reporting on prophetic dreams and visions (as well as a community of YT Christians commenting, “Wow! That sure sounds like a message from God alright!”)
Notice the thin-veneer of “Godliness” It's ALL ABOUT JESUS, don't you know? Even if you don't think she's particularly interesting, finding her gives one hope that there's more out there, like her- some of whom could prove pretty fucking LOLzy, non?
I get the feeling, right around the 1:30 mark, that Curtis Mayfield is cry-barfing in his grave 
LOL- Her Google+ says she was a mortician!
LOL- Her Google+ says she was a mortician!
YouTube
www.youtube.com
YouTube
www.youtube.com
-Part One of Three- (I'm up against the media-limit)
"Terrifying Motherfuckers"
I've only found two so far, but I feel like there's got to be more out there. These folks have an air of mystery around them, and they spout out terrifying shit (to me, anyway).
First up is Servant of God 346, who's been averaging about two videos a day, with no signs of slowing down. I've had a real difficult time getting through most of her videos, because something about them is deeply unsettling to me.
www.youtube.com
The certainty in her voice and that accent are definitely a big part of it. And the fact that you never see her face. A good deal of it is apocalyptic shit. But there's this hypnotic quality to her voice that trips me out, and I end up spacing and couldn't quite tell you what the fuck she's talking about because I'm thinking about how creepy the whole thing is... And why it's so creepy (she's like, THE nightmare crazy aunt/grandma). Does her voice, sound like it has any human warmth or pity in it? Videos range from 3-20 minutes.
www.youtube.com
Comments are disabled for her videos.
Also, I found this video where she appears on camera, and I'm not any less creeped out.
Her google+.
YouTube
Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.
www.youtube.com
YouTube
www.youtube.com
Also, I found this video where she appears on camera, and I'm not any less creeped out.
Her google+.
Whereas Servant of God 346 is more on the subtle, Lynchian horror side, Near Life is much more Japanese New-Wave Horror mixed with unfiltered insanity, typically in bite-sized bits.
www.youtube.com
Whoever they are, they've been around for two years, but just started getting really active in the last month. Short vids mostly, 30s or less, with video description and self-comments that are too voluminous and crazy to copy-paste, or screen-shot here. “His” library of videos is pretty manageable, and I'd recommend you go directly to the YT pages themselves, to see the insanity first hand. The video titles give you a taste.
www.youtube.com
Not sure what the fuck it is- actual insanity or out-there art – but it weirds me the fuck out. "He" linked to this page in one of "his" videos.
Big Bang Blow Mind Implosion M.A.S.E.R. Irony No Fun Game War Death One Sentence No Second Chance!!!
Brain pineal gland out sad song girl both convey as real music conveys meaning no lyric as weep funeral grief cry dry tear ironic How to tell heartless human...
www.youtube.com
CHRIST ANTI ANGEL SATAN NEAR REVEAL BEAST SEX APE MARK MOLECH MOLEST ORGY SABAT JIHAD unHOLY WAR SIN
WHERE DUMB FAITH FRIENDS IN MUTAUL SINS? GABRIEL YAH SHIELD THEM NOT! LUCIFER AVENGE SIN NOW NOT! YAH JUDGE HUMAN HELL SLANG PALANCES STAND BY, SIT TIGHT, PR...
www.youtube.com
People of Interest
These are folks I think are worth subscribing to, and mining through their libraries right away. I'll be monitoring these folks very closely, at least.
I'm digging Blue Heaven- She's a prophet, and IMO good, clean, wholesome Christian fun. Ford Focus commercial? Nope!
www.youtube.com
She saw a panther on TV, and then there was a black cat on her porch! Also check out the totally baffling bat-flavored shit at the 6m mark. Checkmate Atheists!
www.youtube.com
They're referencing this video/advertisement for auto-manufacturer Jaguar.
Also, it seems comments get under her skin, and she more-or-less confirms that she's policing her YT comments.
www.youtube.com
She starts off pretty reasonable-ish, but by about 4m mark she starts really putting out that crazy vibe. By the 6m mark, you can practically see white, all the way around the irises of her eyes.
Anyway, she's got a library of 80 or so videos with some really promising titles that seem like they're worth going through. Wanna help out?
YouTube
www.youtube.com
She saw a panther on TV, and then there was a black cat on her porch! Also check out the totally baffling bat-flavored shit at the 6m mark. Checkmate Atheists!
YouTube
www.youtube.com
Also, it seems comments get under her skin, and she more-or-less confirms that she's policing her YT comments.
YouTube
www.youtube.com
Anyway, she's got a library of 80 or so videos with some really promising titles that seem like they're worth going through. Wanna help out?
This guy's on the border of everything! Spotlight, 1-HW and Vanilla. But I'm bumping him up a notch or two because he's cracking my shit up!
Low output, small library but high quality shit! Rock on dude!
-Part Two of Three-
Last, and certainly not least among persons of interest, is Humble Helper!
Humble Helper has put out some really, really solid shit IMO. Consider: Satanic Snacks, Creepy Full Circle Brand...
YouTube
www.youtube.com
YouTube
www.youtube.com
I also like Christmas is an Abomination and Satanic Police Symbol. Definitely looking forward to exploring her back-catalog for tasty nuggets.
CONCLUSION
Honestly, this was my first trawling expedition- I'm not the most technically-minded dude, so I get the feeling some of you people out there would do a much better job of finding this stuff than I have. I've already found more than I can reasonably go through, and I haven't even gotten around to exploring the leads I really want to chase down.
And it's turned up someone who might be a legit, virgin cow! I'm doing some research now, to see if she warrants her own thread- if not, I'll post her here.
What I'm saying is, I think this is just the tip of the iceberg, and there's no way I'm uncovering it all myself. I hope I've convinced some of you, to go fishing for Youtube Prophets & Preachers yourselves!
-END- Part Three of Three
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If he was active, I'd hold back on posting him, in the hopes of spinning him off into his own thread. As it is now, there's not much point... Come back to youtube Brother Mack! I didn't know