Why doesn't evolution give birds hands?

[SandyCat]

They could really benefit from some hands.

 

[DankSmoker]

Corvids are too smart already, we dont need them to start mugging people.

 

[Bargain Bin Laden]

Because God knows that you will jack off with them

 

[Day Drinking]

Last thing I need is a flying fuck bird flipping me the bird after shitting on my windshield. I would personally hunt every one of the shits down and end that evolutionary progress.

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

Because there’s nothing funnier than seeing birds running around with their goofy flappy feet.

 

[Dialtone]

the proper term for bird hands is "fwingers"

 

[Epic Fail Man]

Because it would lead to more bird on bird violence.

 

[MisoSupper]

god, imagine how much more annoying those little shits would be with that improved level of dexiterity. I can't even imagine how much shit they'd outright steal from ppl's yard in this doomsday scenerio.

 

[Rozzy]

Because it would cause birds to Tweet.

 

[AbyssStarer]

They would become too powerful.

 

[Alligator Alcatraz]

Birds do have hands, they're just really long, thin, and covered in feathers.

 

[mister meaner]

It’s for the same reason you weren’t afab, life just isn’t fair.

 

[TFT-A9]

Corvids are too smart already, we dont need them to start mugging people.

they already do tho

 

[Haint]

Most avian species lost the penis to evolution. So whats the point of hands if you dont have a penis to fondle.