I've been using dating apps. I'll talk with a woman for a while then arrange to meet up but when I show up it's just @Bargain Bin Laden . He wears a different disguise each time. They are low effort disguises and he doesnt even try to look like the person in the pictures he uses. For example one time he was just wearing a Sombrero and fake mustache. He never explains himself and wont tell me why hes doing this. At first i tried to be polite and reason with him but when i tell him im not gay he just demands to watch me jerking off to straight porn to prove it. I dont even talk to him anymore. I just show up for a date, see him there, attack him, we fist fight for a while, and then I go home. I don't know what he gets out of this but he keeps doing it and I want him to stop.
Respond by catfishing *him*. Maybe you start showing up in a series of increasingly more outlandish costumes. Either you'll both actually fall in love or he will give up and go away.
listen man dont worry we just got to fight fire with fire
thats where i come in
i will go and accompany you to your next date in digsuise as your fat black lesbian sister 'Lizzo but not that one' while im getting dressed you need to buy trail mix and pick out the generic brand m&ms out of them (he only eats those and not real m&ms he can tell the diference)
when we get there you hold the trail mix m&ms out flat in your hand and when he goes to eat them from your hand thats when i lift up my fake tits and reach under my real tits for the brass knuckles i dipped in honey and south american bullet ants and dummy him
