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The creator of Celeste, Maddy Thorson, wasn’t aware that they, or Madeline, were trans until they started working on the DLC. In an interview with Medium, Thorson explained that “Celeste is a game written and designed by a closeted trans person who was struggling with their gender identity,” inadvertently making a game about trans struggles. You play as Madeline on a mission to climb Celeste Mountain. Why? To challenge herself and work through her depression. But there’s more to the story; Celeste Mountain has the supernatural ability to make those who climb it face their insecurities, and things can get tense as a result.
Along her journey, Madeline faces many environmental dangers. Additionally, she has to deal with her mirror self, which the fandom dubbed Badeline. She makes things worse for Madeline by not only insulting her, but others as well. Badeline is a metaphor for gender dysphoria and how awful it makes people feel. Gender dysphoria is known to cause low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety, according to the NHS (National Health Service). This dysphoria never goes away completely, but can lessen with the support of friends and family.
What makes Tell Me Why stand out is that it had help from cultural, mental health and transgender advocates. You play as Alyson and Tyler, twins with a supernatural power they call the Bond. They’ve reunited after 10 years following their mother’s death and are trying to figure out what to do next. However, remembering their past and trying to move on might be harder than they think. Not only does this game deal with serious emotional damage, it also touches on a not-often-talked-about subject: parental abuse of children. Kind of. Their mother, Mary-Ann, was complicated. She kept her kids sheltered and had a habit of scaring people away. Not to mention her mood was hot-and-cold with them. She even neglected their care, forcing them to rely on others for food. It seems likely that she had some undiagnosed mental issues she refused to treat.
Some of Mary-Ann’s problems involved her strained relationship with her mother, her unfortunate relationship with the twins’ father, and losing a child in infancy before she had the twins. She never told them about him. With all this affecting her mental health, it’s no wonder she became forgetful and snappy. It’s also no wonder that Tyler thought she was transphobic. Mary-Ann not allowing him to cut his hair or get into sports told him she was emasculating him. She kept calling him by feminine pronouns and, in his mind, hinted that she'd rather hurt him than accept him as a boy. What else is a kid supposed to think when their mother points a shotgun at them?
Alyson and Tyler were 10 when Mary-Ann really started going downhill. Kids interpret things very differently. In Tyler’s memory, Mary-Ann confided in family friend Tessa that he was transgender, and Tessa gave her a pamphlet for a religious youth camp. When Tyler confronts Tessa later, she swears she had no idea they practiced conversion therapy. A recent study from the JAMA (Journal of the American Medical Association) Network showed that conversion therapy uses “dangerous, discredited practices” and “reinforces societal prejudices and stigmas.” Tyler finds out Mary-Ann was disgusted by the pamphlet and cut Tessa out of her life because of it. It hurts when family members are transphobic, but it's the best feeling when they're accepting and supportive. Plus, phobic family members may eventually change their minds and try to do better.
Another game tackling mental health, this time with body horror, is The Missing: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories. It starts innocuously enough; 19-year-old JJ is camping with her best friend Emily on a secluded island. When JJ wakes up to find Emily gone, she goes out to search for her. This is where things get terrifying. After narrowly avoiding a falling tree struck by lightning, JJ gets struck herself and set on fire. Normally she’d be dead, but somehow she revives and pushes forward. It’s heartbreaking hearing her cry afterwards; the pain must’ve been indescribable. She has to keep harming herself to make it through all the puzzles in her way. The Missingdoes not pull punches with JJ’s pain.
Every bone broken, every limb hacked off, she’s screaming in agony. Not only that, but you can hear her body squelching and creaking whenever she’s moving. JJ does lose blood, of course, but blood splatter is white, and her body turns black, regaining color when she heals. She’s not the only one hurting herself, however. There are some enemies she encounters along the way. Some minor ones are Baby Dolls and Cymbal Monkeys. The Baby Dolls are first, preceded by music. Looking like a macabre version of the decapitated doll head in Toy Story, they hide in trees and are hard to spot. When JJ gets underneath one, it drops and snags her, cutting her to pieces.
The Cymbal Monkeys are huge, and they chase you. If caught, the monkeys will slam their cymbals on JJ, bang them on the ground, then throw her. Last is the giant humanoid Hairshrieker. It wields a boxcutter, a tool common in suicides. This monster is another metaphor for gender dysphoria, i.e. JJ's feelings about being born male. What makes the Hairshrieker worse is that she’s also a representation of how JJ’s dealt with her pain. It's understandable why JJ slit her wrists. She was outed without her consent and bullied at school, and her mother invaded her room, read her diary, and forced her to go to a physician, hoping to cure her. It's a miracle she survived her suicide attempt, but The Missing does end on a hopeful note. With the right help and acceptance, it'll be possible for JJ to live as her authentic self.
These games may relate to trans reality, but it’s tiring only seeing nothing but the melancholic. Granted, there are few positive games with trans protagonists. For example, Dream Daddy has a binder body in the character creation along with a dateable trans dad. Plus the Sims 4 added gender customization and the ability to change a Sim's gender. However, the gaming industry still has a long ways to go. It’s important for trans people to be happy and loved too. They deserve to have as much positive representation as anyone else. They are more than their pain. Trans people are allowed to experience acceptance from those around them. There needs to be more games expressing the euphoria of being trans.
Why Are Games With Trans Protagonists Always So Sad?
Transgender representation in video games has seen a significant surge in the past few years. While side trans characters get mostly positive experiences, trans characters in the protagonist role always seem to be going through hell. Mental anguish, physical pain, phobic words and actions; they go through it all just to reach a modicum of a happy ending. Why is this? It's like the gaming industry doesn't know that happy trans people exist. Let’s discuss examples of these kinds of melancholic games.The creator of Celeste, Maddy Thorson, wasn’t aware that they, or Madeline, were trans until they started working on the DLC. In an interview with Medium, Thorson explained that “Celeste is a game written and designed by a closeted trans person who was struggling with their gender identity,” inadvertently making a game about trans struggles. You play as Madeline on a mission to climb Celeste Mountain. Why? To challenge herself and work through her depression. But there’s more to the story; Celeste Mountain has the supernatural ability to make those who climb it face their insecurities, and things can get tense as a result.
Along her journey, Madeline faces many environmental dangers. Additionally, she has to deal with her mirror self, which the fandom dubbed Badeline. She makes things worse for Madeline by not only insulting her, but others as well. Badeline is a metaphor for gender dysphoria and how awful it makes people feel. Gender dysphoria is known to cause low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety, according to the NHS (National Health Service). This dysphoria never goes away completely, but can lessen with the support of friends and family.
What makes Tell Me Why stand out is that it had help from cultural, mental health and transgender advocates. You play as Alyson and Tyler, twins with a supernatural power they call the Bond. They’ve reunited after 10 years following their mother’s death and are trying to figure out what to do next. However, remembering their past and trying to move on might be harder than they think. Not only does this game deal with serious emotional damage, it also touches on a not-often-talked-about subject: parental abuse of children. Kind of. Their mother, Mary-Ann, was complicated. She kept her kids sheltered and had a habit of scaring people away. Not to mention her mood was hot-and-cold with them. She even neglected their care, forcing them to rely on others for food. It seems likely that she had some undiagnosed mental issues she refused to treat.
Some of Mary-Ann’s problems involved her strained relationship with her mother, her unfortunate relationship with the twins’ father, and losing a child in infancy before she had the twins. She never told them about him. With all this affecting her mental health, it’s no wonder she became forgetful and snappy. It’s also no wonder that Tyler thought she was transphobic. Mary-Ann not allowing him to cut his hair or get into sports told him she was emasculating him. She kept calling him by feminine pronouns and, in his mind, hinted that she'd rather hurt him than accept him as a boy. What else is a kid supposed to think when their mother points a shotgun at them?
Alyson and Tyler were 10 when Mary-Ann really started going downhill. Kids interpret things very differently. In Tyler’s memory, Mary-Ann confided in family friend Tessa that he was transgender, and Tessa gave her a pamphlet for a religious youth camp. When Tyler confronts Tessa later, she swears she had no idea they practiced conversion therapy. A recent study from the JAMA (Journal of the American Medical Association) Network showed that conversion therapy uses “dangerous, discredited practices” and “reinforces societal prejudices and stigmas.” Tyler finds out Mary-Ann was disgusted by the pamphlet and cut Tessa out of her life because of it. It hurts when family members are transphobic, but it's the best feeling when they're accepting and supportive. Plus, phobic family members may eventually change their minds and try to do better.
Another game tackling mental health, this time with body horror, is The Missing: J.J. Macfield and the Island of Memories. It starts innocuously enough; 19-year-old JJ is camping with her best friend Emily on a secluded island. When JJ wakes up to find Emily gone, she goes out to search for her. This is where things get terrifying. After narrowly avoiding a falling tree struck by lightning, JJ gets struck herself and set on fire. Normally she’d be dead, but somehow she revives and pushes forward. It’s heartbreaking hearing her cry afterwards; the pain must’ve been indescribable. She has to keep harming herself to make it through all the puzzles in her way. The Missingdoes not pull punches with JJ’s pain.
Every bone broken, every limb hacked off, she’s screaming in agony. Not only that, but you can hear her body squelching and creaking whenever she’s moving. JJ does lose blood, of course, but blood splatter is white, and her body turns black, regaining color when she heals. She’s not the only one hurting herself, however. There are some enemies she encounters along the way. Some minor ones are Baby Dolls and Cymbal Monkeys. The Baby Dolls are first, preceded by music. Looking like a macabre version of the decapitated doll head in Toy Story, they hide in trees and are hard to spot. When JJ gets underneath one, it drops and snags her, cutting her to pieces.
The Cymbal Monkeys are huge, and they chase you. If caught, the monkeys will slam their cymbals on JJ, bang them on the ground, then throw her. Last is the giant humanoid Hairshrieker. It wields a boxcutter, a tool common in suicides. This monster is another metaphor for gender dysphoria, i.e. JJ's feelings about being born male. What makes the Hairshrieker worse is that she’s also a representation of how JJ’s dealt with her pain. It's understandable why JJ slit her wrists. She was outed without her consent and bullied at school, and her mother invaded her room, read her diary, and forced her to go to a physician, hoping to cure her. It's a miracle she survived her suicide attempt, but The Missing does end on a hopeful note. With the right help and acceptance, it'll be possible for JJ to live as her authentic self.
These games may relate to trans reality, but it’s tiring only seeing nothing but the melancholic. Granted, there are few positive games with trans protagonists. For example, Dream Daddy has a binder body in the character creation along with a dateable trans dad. Plus the Sims 4 added gender customization and the ability to change a Sim's gender. However, the gaming industry still has a long ways to go. It’s important for trans people to be happy and loved too. They deserve to have as much positive representation as anyone else. They are more than their pain. Trans people are allowed to experience acceptance from those around them. There needs to be more games expressing the euphoria of being trans.
