Why are full-Asians so weird looking?

[BirdUp]

whats with their eyes

 

[Eddie Riggs]

Too many wangs have spoiled the broth, clearly

 

[Shamefur Dispray]

Maybe they got bloated from eating too much?

 

[Spud]

Since they have a weakness to bright light (See Hiroshima) their eye's evolved to be capable of seeing during bright flashes of light, hence the slant eyes

 

[The Backwards Man]

they're like that so whitey could make fun of them

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

They got the same god-tier start position as white people but had the benefits of higher fertility and faster tech research until the Medieval Era. Something has to give to balance that out.