What's Star Wars about?

[YellowIsACoolColor]

I've never seen the movies. What's it about?

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

Klingonz & Laserswords

 

[Johnathan Readit]

Originally it was about space incest but now it's about space necromancy cause Disney keeps reanimating it's space corpse

 

[Daddy's Angry Juice]

about 2h 1m

 

[#1 Hot Sauce of Kiwi Farm]

A terrorist cell overthrowing and destroying an empire that kept the peace. Not sure if the rebels even had a plan for after they won as unlike the Emperor who actually planned and set everything in place for a mostly peaceful transition of power. Only ones he killed were the kidnapping warrior priests aka the Jedi.

 

[Pagan Min]

It's an animated movie about anthropomorphic stars fighting against one another. REALLY weird, and best viewed while heavily drugged out of your mind...

 

[Le b0wski]

It's an advert for beer in Chile that got way out of hand.

 

[Fae Supremacist]

Jar Jar Binks. He's the key to all of this.

 

[SquareNerd]

It's about characters getting their limbs and heads sliced off with lightsabers

 

[Shartavius]

The films are about guilt-free murder.

 

[Solomon Bundy]

The ones with Captain Kirk?

They're about banging hot chicks.

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Merchandising. Where the real money from the movie is made.

 

[Ventrue]

Its about an Indian kid with asthma named Darth Vader that always liked super heroes and the National Football League. He was denied his chance to wear a cape and a football helmet, he went to special classes so he wore a helmet for different reasons.

As an adult he lived with an inhaler and a hatred for his son, Luke Skywalker who is not his real son because his son has blonde hair and blue eyes, Darth is a pajeet. His son was like a totally popular jock or whatever and Darth hated that because he was bullied by the jocks.

They fight for the handicapped parking space with glow wands and nigger magic called The Force. In order to use The Force they have to reach Nirvana by listening to album Nevermind on repeat for a week. Only a true Jedi master can make the connection on why a man who wore a dress shot himself.

 

[Farsided]

It's about a farmer, but not a kiwi farmer, just a regular boring farmer who set on a journey to bust someone's ball. He befriends a a premature ejaculator that always shoot his load within seconds and his furry friend. There's also a really fat man without limbs who's got a fetish for enslaved white women.

 

[2mm and 99 others]

 

[Kosher Dill]

It's mostly about Rey's grandparents.

 

[Cat tit bingo]

It's about 25% hidden fortress 25% valerian and laureline, 20% the foundation trilogy 10% flash gordan 10% the dam busters 5% other miscellaneous scifi and 5% real life culture prepared in the classical heros journey.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

Kissing your sister and regicide.

 

[A Very Big Fish]

Imagine Indiana Jones, but in space, and instead of the Stormtroopers being led by Hitler, they're led by some old guy who looks like Pope Benedict XVI.

 

[Juaco]

A raisen looking geizer starts a shitflinging war with the galaxy so an orphan hooks up with a creepy bearded man and his sister in order to explode said geizers balls.