Containment What If?

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What if Chris was an old man fashioning a kayak out of a log?

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So many questions...

What if Chris got one of those fancy dancy 5000 dollar (C/W Quarter exchange rate?) weekly tugboats? With a substantial secured income, how long would it take for him to sink into debt?
 
So many questions...

What if Chris got one of those fancy dancy 5000 dollar (C/W Quarter exchange rate?) weekly tugboats? With a substantial secured income, how long would it take for him to sink into debt?

How long does it take to drive to the nearest Toys R Us he isn't banned from?

Because about 20 minutes after that.
 
So anyway, I have a friend whose younger brother was a total Thomas the Tank Engine sperg, and through that he became very knowledgeable about trains. He's now got a job as a train driver. My "What If" is, what if Chris had channeled his obsession with Sonic into some related-but-practical area?
 
So anyway, I have a friend whose younger brother was a total Thomas the Tank Engine sperg, and through that he became very knowledgeable about trains. He's now got a job as a train driver. My "What If" is, what if Chris had channeled his obsession with Sonic into some related-but-practical area?

I guess track athlete who says "gotta go fast" as he leaves the starting line.
 
So anyway, I have a friend whose younger brother was a total Thomas the Tank Engine sperg, and through that he became very knowledgeable about trains. He's now got a job as a train driver. My "What If" is, what if Chris had channeled his obsession with Sonic into some related-but-practical area?
I can't see how he could do anything with Sonic aside from maybe doing what @miikii said and become a track athlete...
But concerning his obession with Pokemon and his fondness of the spanish language, I just imagined Chris leaving his home to go to Mexico to become a professional cock trainer and participate in cockfights.
"Roosterchu! I choose you!"
"Use Iron Spurs! HM YEAH!"

The tale of Ricardo Weston Chantecler, Winner of the six leagues of Mexican Cockfighting isn't so bad compared to Chris Trespassing Chronicles...
 
So anyway, I have a friend whose younger brother was a total Thomas the Tank Engine sperg, and through that he became very knowledgeable about trains. He's now got a job as a train driver. My "What If" is, what if Chris had channeled his obsession with Sonic into some related-but-practical area?
Chris as an electrician is loosely why his house burned down, so yea, fire. Lots and lots of fire.
 
What if Chris became a famous Mexican luchador?
 
What if Chris became a famous Mexican luchador?
He's got the build for it (before you flame me remember I'm British and my only exposure to Mexican Wrestling is Nacho Libre and I admit that makes me ignorant). I don't know, I mean how successful would El Autismo be? Also, sidenote, Chris as a Luchador is a piece of fan-art I'm now dying to see.

What if Chris was a eunuch?
He's overweight, effeminate, has an annoying high pitched voice and no sex drive. Present to me some credible evidence that he ISN'T a Eunuch?
 
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Edit: If Chris goes to jail, we wait and see what occurs. While many believe he would be a consistant victim, I see him turning into the stupidest criminal ever. I imagine badly done tattoos done over a public toilet, weirder hairstyles, and maybe even a badly done attempt to become a lawyer using the prison library.

The universe would collapse upon itself. But more likely, he would have been picked up by a modelling agency and milked for money while they paid him in legos.

Then he would lose his career when someone clever challenged Chris to chug warm frying medium.
 
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What if Chris went to a liberal arts college in Virginia and graduated? What if Chris went to UVA and graduated?
 
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