UN Venezuela Megathread - Mercenaries 2 references galore! Cubanodun is MVP

With the news of an attempted army uprising ending in many arrests happening in the troubled nation, I think now is the time to just say 'Post all Venezuela related news here'

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-40843494

The civil war is upon us.

 

[JosephTX]

Link this now.

 

[JosephTX]

Colombia has been quite eager to get to Venezuela. Put it this way, Venezuela is not only that neighbor who never shuts up and constantly insults you, but the children constantly enter your garden and destroy it while the friends vandalize the whole vicinity selling drugs and praising communism.

All jokes aside, though, Colombia's been having a very serious problem with Venezuelan immigrants. Their borders have been quite flooded with people who were hungry and needy and they couldn't deal with it any more. I can understand why many people want Colombia to military intervene so they would finally have some peace. They also want to help them: "Colombia has contacted international lending agencies about devising a financial rescue plan worth up to $60 billion for neighboring Venezuela if President Nicholas Maduro leaves power, Colombia’s finance minister said in an interview on Friday."

Did everyone forget back in 2015 when Venezuela deported all colombians at gunpoint after siezing and bulldozing their houses with no notice or warning and then flew fighter jets into Colombian airspace to dickwave and somehow managing to crash a relatively new SU-30 in the process?

 

[Tasty Tatty]

Did everyone forget back in 2015 when Venezuela deported all colombians at gunpoint after siezing and bulldozing their houses with no notice or warning and then flew fighter jets into Colombian airspace to dickwave and somehow managing to crash a relatively new SU-30 in the process?

Venezuelans didn't do that: Maduro did. I guess that's how they're choosing to see it?

 

[Non-Threatening Niall]

Link this now.

As I've been ninja'd, I'll leave this here to make up for it: https://www.notipanamericana.com.ve/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/tumblr_n45cjtiiAg1t169bjo1_1280.png

(sorry about the link, the upload-thing is being a cunt)

 

[Ghostse]

Neither Chile or Paraguay would take Maduro. Paragua was the first country in cut any diplomatic tie with them and Chilean president is Right Wing. Uruguay recently had an incident giving asylum to a president and they turned him down, so I'm sure they'll do the same, neutrality or not.

I could have sworn I saw Chile straight up offered Maduro exile as a way to defuse the situation, but I can't find anything about so maybe I misread it or it was just someone's speculation.
Uruguay is backing Maduro hard, but I'll believe you if you say they're not going to commit.
So, looks pretty much like just Cuba now.
Iran would only do it to piss off the US, and right now we're saying "Take their corrupt president...PLEASE!". Turkey is fully backing Maduro now, but Erdogan wouldn't have any use for him once he's deposed - he's just propping up another Dictator who's on the outs with the US-axis. Same with China; they have no use for him once he can't sell them Venezuela's resources for pennies Bolivars on the dollar, and he's got to know they'd sell him out to the new government for an extra 1/8 point on whatever deal they do with the new regime.

Ironically, I reckon the threat of ELN and FARC remnants operating across borders would be the go-to excuse to justify Colombian involvement.

I might be off base as I've not been reading my CIA factbooks on Venezuela & Friends (I thought I'd get a little more heads up before The Happenings began) but FARC had been pretty well neutered as an actual threat long before the surrender, and since they've been playing ball and have """""""""disarmed(lol)"""""""""""", the central government has been taking great pains not to provoke them, because the peace deal with FARC was not very popular and if FARC decided this was bullshit and got back up to their old tricks, pretty much no one currently in office will be reelected.

Columbia doesn't seem to be in any hurry to stir shit with Venezuela despite historic tensions. Columbia has also been behaving extremely magnanimously towards Venezuela, making it easier to Venezuelans to cross the border and buy supplies in Columbia. (Again, I haven't paid much attention to Columbian politics, so may very well be wrong). I don't know if this a "new leaf" so much as its a new and exciting way to piss on the central government and look good internationally.
They have an interest in keeping the region calm & stable, and don't want to bring in additional military assets to risk agitating FARC.

 

[Ahriman]

(((Joanna))) is a full SJW, if you ask. She's very anti-communist, which is rare for her type, but many of the things she believes are based on Marxism ideologies so... I don't know how her head doesn't explode.

Indeed. She's a walking contradiction, all the more reason to dislike her.

On the other hand, guatemalan writer and libertarian Gloria Álvarez is a staunch anti-socialist.

And a total qt so she may or may not be my waifu.

 

[Coleslaw]

I could have sworn I saw Chile straight up offered Maduro exile as a way to defuse the situation, but I can't find anything about so maybe I misread it or it was just someone's speculation.
Uruguay is backing Maduro hard, but I'll believe you if you say they're not going to commit.
So, looks pretty much like just Cuba now.
Iran would only do it to piss off the US, and right now we're saying "Take their corrupt president...PLEASE!". Turkey is fully backing Maduro now, but Erdogan wouldn't have any use for him once he's deposed - he's just propping up another Dictator who's on the outs with the US-axis. Same with China; they have no use for him once he can't sell them Venezuela's resources for pennies Bolivars on the dollar, and he's got to know they'd sell him out to the new government for an extra 1/8 point on whatever deal they do with the new regime.



I might be off base as I've not been reading my CIA factbooks on Venezuela & Friends (I thought I'd get a little more heads up before The Happenings began) but FARC had been pretty well neutered as an actual threat long before the surrender, and since they've been playing ball and have """""""""disarmed(lol)"""""""""""", the central government has been taking great pains not to provoke them, because the peace deal with FARC was not very popular and if FARC decided this was bullshit and got back up to their old tricks, pretty much no one currently in office will be reelected.

Columbia doesn't seem to be in any hurry to stir shit with Venezuela despite historic tensions. Columbia has also been behaving extremely magnanimously towards Venezuela, making it easier to Venezuelans to cross the border and buy supplies in Columbia. (Again, I haven't paid much attention to Columbian politics, so may very well be wrong). I don't know if this a "new leaf" so much as its a new and exciting way to piss on the central government and look good internationally.
They have an interest in keeping the region calm & stable, and don't want to bring in additional military assets to risk agitating FARC.

Wasn't V part of C at one point?

 

[Miller]

@Miller are you in venezuela taking a "vacation" by any chance?

I can neither confirm nor deny.

 

[Tasty Tatty]

On the other hand, guatemalan writer and libertarian Gloria Álvarez is a staunch anti-socialist.

And a total qt so she may or may not be my waifu.

She's economically libertarian, but she's a bit progressive and has some Social-Justiceish ideas.

Uruguay is backing Maduro hard, but I'll believe you if you say they're not going to commit.

The deal with Uruguay is that, as someone pointed out above, they got in a diplomatic mess with Peru after a former president of them asked for asylum when he was under investigation because Uruguay has history of giving asylum to persecuted politicians. This politician, for what I read, is part of a very important leftist party who was highly persecuted in the 70s but he wasn't precisely left. Not only the very leftist Uruguayans wanted his request denied but most of the opposition want it denied too because there was no persecution against the guy. Now, the question would be "is Maduro being persecuted?". Of course, some people would say he is, but if Uruguay agrees with this, put it this way: if Maduro eventually leaves, this means Venezuela will have a new government and by taking Maduro, Uruguay will get into trouble with this new government and a high majority in Latin America. If the situation with that peruvian president was bad, and this guy was not remotely like Maduro, Uruguayan society could become very divided if they give Maduro asylum.

So, looks pretty much like just Cuba now.
Iran would only do it to piss off the US, and right now we're saying "Take their corrupt president...PLEASE!". Turkey is fully backing Maduro now, but Erdogan wouldn't have any use for him once he's deposed - he's just propping up another Dictator who's on the outs with the US-axis. Same with China; they have no use for him once he can't sell them Venezuela's resources for pennies Bolivars on the dollar, and he's got to know they'd sell him out to the new government for an extra 1/8 point on whatever deal they do with the new regime.

Yes. Many people believe they are with Venezuela due to an ideologically stand but it's a mixture of that and how they can buy venezuelan resources very cheap. If the new president is able to strike a good deal with any of these countries that are owed money, they won't take Maduro.

The only one is Cuba because by protecting Maduro they are protecting the ideology they've been supporting all these years. That and Maduro probably has some dirt on the Castros.

 

[Ghostse]

Wasn't V part of C at one point?

In the early 1800's it was part of Gran Columbia along with Ecuador and Panama. It got independance in the break up, as did ecuador, and Columbia waffled on a name for a few decades eventually deciding on "The Republic of Columbia".

 

[1Tonka_Truck]

Supposedly Maduro just gave Russia $840 million in gold, 26% of Venezuela's debt to Russia.

That ruskie 777 was a cargo variant. Still in transit over the Atlantic. Will be interesting to see if it stops in Dubai again.
https://www.radarbox24.com/data/flights/ERF9703

Edit: That track is full of shit. This is the correct flight path. Direct back to Moscow. I guess I can't expect too much out of free. https://www.radarbox24.com/data/registration/VP-BJG#1183175724

 

[Iceland Heavy]

The T-72s Venezuela has are the shitty export models. The BMP is probably the only real threat in their inventory, principally because its likely even Maduro's appointees have been able to keep it running.

Columbia doesn't really need tanks, they have helicopters and AT-4s.

IIRC they're T-72B1s, which aren't terrible, basically slightly worse than what the average Soviet Motor Rifle division would've had on hand in 1985, better than what the Iraqis were rolling around with in 1991 anyway. Whether they're even properly crewed, maintained or supported is another matter of course.

 

[Cubanodun]

A few months ago Maduro was kissing gold bars on TV while his people ate zoo animals.
This couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.

And those gold bars? gone, he is trying to sell it to the emirates for cash

The deal is still not sealed because no one want to pozload my neghole poo but he is trying ANYTHING to get cash, he has pretty much burned all of our gold reserves in less than a year, the euro parliament just cucked him today by recognizing Guaido, some countries like Spain are going to recognize him in a couple of days because reasons, the EU is a freaking mess honestly not even for Maduro they can get their head out of their ass

Maduro fleeing the country to seek asylum might be the best outcome for everyone.

Pretty much the opinion of Bolton: " dude just fuck off already get the hint"

Link this now.

You think the guerrilla jesus was the most stupid thing Chaviztas had done? nah brah back in the day there was a entire sect that worshiped Chavez like a god

Imagine the imperial cult of WH40K but totally serious

 

[yeahweknow]

Social media bullshit? The screenshot was a first hand account from my friend in Los Teques.

by chance does your friend glow in the dark?

 

[Super-Chevy454]

The only one is Cuba because by protecting Maduro they are protecting the ideology they've been supporting all these years. That and Maduro probably has some dirt on the Castros.

Imagine what if Maduro decided to spill the beans about the Castros? What might have been...

You think the guerrilla jesus was the most stupid thing Chaviztas had done? nah brah back in the day there was a entire sect that worshiped Chavez like a god

View attachment 654086

Imagine the imperial cult of WH40K but totally serious

I could call this the "full Chavez worshipping syndrome". I wonder if Samuel L. Jackson, Danny Glover and Sean Penn had reached that full level of Chavez worshipping?

 

[AnOminous]

Pretty much the opinion of Bolton: " dude just fuck off already get the hint"

Not a huge fan of Bolton either, but he's right. This dumb asshole needs to GTFO now if he likes the idea of his heart continuing to beat and not having to try to learn to fly suddenly.

 

[Non-Threatening Niall]

I could call this the "full Chavez worshipping syndrome". I wonder if Samuel L. Jackson, Danny Glover and Sean Penn had reached that full level of Chavez worshipping?

Jeremy Corbyn prolly has.

 

[BrunoMattei]

Not a huge fan of Bolton either, but he's right. This dumb asshole needs to GTFO now if he likes the idea of his heart continuing to beat and not having to try to learn to fly suddenly.

I doubt he'll escape alive, personally.

 

[JosephTX]

In the early 1800's it was part of Gran Columbia along with Ecuador and Panama. It got independance in the break up, as did ecuador, and Columbia waffled on a name for a few decades eventually deciding on "The Republic of Columbia".

Fun fact, Colombia still has Panama on their national coat of arms.

 

[Glad I couldn't help]

Fun fact, Colombia still has Panama on their national coat of arms.

Hmm...

Some critics have argued that the coat of arms is outdated and anachronistic, as the Andean condor is a very threatened species in the country, with barely 100 creatures soaring the landscape. It has also been discussed that the condor is still a vulture and feeds of carrion, making it an animal with a low profile that never hunts its own food. In addition, the Andean condor is also the national bird of Ecuador, Bolivia and Chile. The pomegranate, being a Mediterranean fruit, is not currently cultivated in Colombia and the Phrygian cap is of Greek origin. The Isthmus of Panama, no longer belonging to Colombia, has also been suggested as an element needing changing.