Utilikilt Wearers - Its like a kilt but gay

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Ariel

Ariel

Sorbet
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
For those who don't know a utilikilt is a bastardised kilt with pockets for holding knives and various pretty minerals. The wearers tend to be middle aged men with a paunch and a penchant for historical reenactments. They also verge of fetish wear when worn by old goths who haven't given up pleather and new rock boots.

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This spastic thinks his first kilt was a momentous occasion in his life. Not the hats in the background lol


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Utilikilts are awful. I have seen exactly one here and that was on a retarded biker who uses the bus and wears random bits of medieval armour.

The people who wear them seem to think they're connecting with their ancestors while ignoring that tartan kilts were worn because they were 'fashionable' and brightly coloured. The modern equivelant to the kilted clansmen is a ned in a bright tracksuit and would almost certainly have the same reaction to a man in a brown skirt.
 
Vitriol said:
Utilikilts are awful. I have seen exactly one here and that was on a retarded biker who uses the bus and wears random bits of medieval armour.

The people who wear them seem to think they're connecting with their ancestors while ignoring that tartan kilts were worn because they were 'fashionable' and brightly coloured. The modern equivelant to the kilted clansmen is a ned in a bright tracksuit and would almost certainly have the same reaction to a man in a brown skirt.
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This.
Its like somehow they feel a denim cargo skirt connects them to demented tribal warriors who were still obsessed with killing rival clans while the rest of England had moved on to harnessing the power of steam and conquering the world.
 
Wouldn't it also provide significantly less protection for their "manly parts" while doing "manly things"
 
autisticdragonkin said:
Wouldn't it also provide significantly less protection for their "manly parts" while doing "manly things"
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Thats why the military abandoned them- chlorine does horrible things to unprotected genitals.

If they are anything like normal kilts they are probably comfy- but so are silk pyjamas and you wouldnt wear them out.
 
Vitriol said:
Thats why the military abandoned them- chlorine does horrible things to unprotected genitals.

If they are anything like normal kilts they are probably comfy- but so are silk pyjamas and you wouldnt wear them out.
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My Great-Grandpa said a few antedotes about them, in WWI some people still wore them even with the mustard gas attacks. They said that the thick material masked the gas from hitting their asses, which was a complete lie.
 
Valiant said:
My Great-Grandpa said a few antedotes about them, in WWI some people still wore them even with the mustard gas attacks. They said that the thick material masked the gas from hitting their asses, which was a complete lie.
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Apperently my great grandfather insisted his men wear tights after he saw the aftermath of such an attack. No idea if it worked or if it is even true but thats the story.

But while chlorine is rare nowadays the floaty pleated nature of kilts does make them less than ideal around machinary or so one assumes.
 
Valiant said:
My Great-Grandpa said a few antedotes about them, in WWI some people still wore them even with the mustard gas attacks. They said that the thick material masked the gas from hitting their asses, which was a complete lie.
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I thought kilts were only part of dress uniforms by that time -- wouldn't they have been wearing khaki on the battlefields?
 
Do these people really count as lolcows? I'm not seeing a lot of evidence of chimpouts or stupidity, besides what's in the OP.
 
I love kilts (tartan of course, not the utility style) but in this day and age you really need the right person wearing them to be cool. For example
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