Lovequest Updated OkCupid profile

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4Macie said:
Omfg. I just puked. Why did his splunk taste like grilled chicken (even after the fanta??)? And why would he even fucking bother writing this on his okcupid profile?
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To be fair Chris probably isn't talking about real grilled chicken himself. He switched to McDonald's Grilled Chicken to prove he was eating healthy, and platen-cooked fast food grilled chicken does taste like a cross between a shoe sole and old semen.
 
mal6 said:
To be fair Chris probably isn't talking about real grilled chicken himself. He switched to McDonald's Grilled Chicken to prove he was eating healthy, and platen-cooked fast food grilled chicken does taste like a cross between a shoe sole and old semen.
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Good explanation, but it still doesn't explain why he'd put that shit on a dating site...
 
Mogambo said:
Good explanation, but it still doesn't explain why he'd put that shit on a dating site...
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CHINA (then surrogate mommy, then Crystal) is one hell of a motivator. In this case I would have preferred, "Your question has been read fully, and your thoughts have been inputed and accepted for better improvement. Thank you for your time and efforts."
 
asperhes said:
How do you take care of household pests (cockroaches, spiders and the like)?
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(snip)
asperhes said:
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Give them a friendly hug
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The secrets of the Chandlers' housekeeping, explained at last!
 
4Macie said:
Really, Chris? So what's all this fuss about Males not wearing shirts?


Omfg. I just puked. Why did his splunk taste like grilled chicken (even after the fanta??)? And why would he even fucking bother writing this on his okcupid profile?

Isn't this what Chris has wanted from any girl that has a boyfriend when he meets them? Like, this is exactly what he wanted Kacey to do...

Again, this is exactly what Chris planned for his first time. Remember? He told us he was going to film his first time, even if the girl said no (or he wouldn't tell her) so he could post it online to show everyone he lost his virginity to a girl AND WAS TOTALLY STRAAAAIGHT.


So Long Story Short... Chris is still a no good dirty liar. Nothing new learned, just re-enforced.
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It also shows why dating sites such as these aren't really reliable.
You don't get a person that matches up, you get a person that pretends to match up.
In that regard it's not differing from people that lie on a date, but I have the vague feeling it's way easier to get crap past the radar online.
 
I was bored and decided to answer some of the questions that Chris had and found a couple of pretty odd results (Red means it's an answer that Chris does not approve of):
okcupid.png

Also apparently Chris is a big fan of opera:
Your date for the evening surprises you with a pair of opera tickets. You
okcupid.png
 
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Chris Tran said:
Do you think partial birth abortion should be banned?

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I'm conflicted/I don't know enough to say Partial Birth? What, the head isn't enough, you want the child to be a quadriplegic?
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Wow. Just... WOW.
 
Mogambo said:
Good explanation, but it still doesn't explain why he'd put that shit on a dating site...
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I find it odd, given that one of the criticisms made of his responses in the Mailbag was that they were often one-word answers with no elaboration (e.g. "Do you like listening to music while you work?" "Yes."). Be careful what you wish for, I guess.
 
Pickle Inspector said:
I was bored and decided to answer some of the questions that Chris had and found a couple of pretty odd results (Red means it's an answer that Chris does not approve of):
View attachment 11977
Also apparently Chris is a big fan of opera:
Your date for the evening surprises you with a pair of opera tickets. You
View attachment 11978
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Weird, how does he know about those two anyway? Through Bob?
And while I love the idea of Chris going to the opera, he strucks me more of the guy who'd enjoy musicals. The more I think about it the more I believe that this could be an acceptable hobby for him and a first step into normal society. After a whole lot of therapy of course.
 
Nikolai Drozdov said:
Weird, how does he know about those two anyway? Through Bob?
And while I love the idea of Chris going to the opera, he strucks me more of the guy who'd enjoy musicals. The more I think about it the more I believe that this could be an acceptable hobby for him and a first step into normal society. After a whole lot of therapy of course.
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OKCupid questions are just dropdown lists you choose an answer from, I find it a bit suspect that Chris would know who international opera singers are but who knows.
 
Pickle Inspector said:
OKCupid questions are just dropdown lists you choose an answer from, I find it a bit suspect that Chris would know who international opera singers are but who knows.
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Sorry, I somehow thought that this was his own answer. But it makes you wonder. We all know these two singers although the most of us probably never heard their music on purpose. And there are millions of things regular people know or heard of while their are not of importance to them but is it the same for Chris?
 
You know, we've all had a good laugh at Chris' hilarious misunderstanding of partial birth abortion, but is it possible we are just... misunderstanding Chris? Again. I mean, could it be Chris trying to make a joke?
 
asperhes said:
Assume you have a homosexual friend who is the same gender as you. Would it bother you if they hugged you?

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Yes. That's talking about Males hugging me; I would feel bothered if a male hugged me.
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But really Chris's gender identity is legitimately starting to confuse me now, does he think he's still a male but wants to be treated like a female anyway?
 
Lalala said:
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But really Chris's gender identity is legitimately starting to confuse me now, does he think he's still a male but wants to be treated like a female anyway?
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Chris wants a lifestyle where nothing is expected of him and everything he wants is handed to him with absolutely zero effort on his part
Chris believes that being a women is a shortcut to this existence because he thinks women only shop and spend their husbands money
However Chris also doesn't want to give up his duck so he half arses his transition by being a 'tomgirl', which he thinks is his genius solution to the problem of wanting a completely passive lifestyle without any of the work to earn it
 
Atlas 95 said:
Chris wants a lifestyle where nothing is expected of him and everything he wants is handed to him with absolutely zero effort on his part
Chris believes that being a women is a shortcut to this existence because he thinks women only shop and spend their husbands money
However Chris also doesn't want to give up his duck so he half arses his transition by being a 'tomgirl', which he thinks is his genius solution to the problem of wanting a completely passive lifestyle without any of the work to earn it
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Chris wants to get rid of his dick.
 
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