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http://web.archive.org/web/20110226.../pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/BadassBookworm

Browsing through the archive of troper tales, and it's pretty much a sampler of autism. It's absolutely filled with stories which certainly did not happen, or likely happened in a way that was completely different than what is being described. Especially any trope relating to "being a badass" or hidden talents. The badass bookworm trope is exceptional for this.

 
http://web.archive.org/web/20101231022328/http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/Tsundere

This troper is a Type B, an adaptation she developed in response to her mother, also a Type B. When her mother flips out, her deredere side goes very Emotionless Girl, prompting Mum to get even more pissed at the "Dead-Eyed-Cow Look." In daily life, she's mostly deredere, but she comes with a built-in Protective Onii-sama feature in her brain that causes her to go tsuntsun on any of the Deadpan Snarker Jerkasses she's attracted to (via a combination of strategies 2 and 3), while any Nice Guy who manages to slip through is filtered by the Protective Onee-sama feature, which takes his side and tells her she's too mean to deserve him and should just let him go. She is still hoping and praying for a Hot Blooded Stepford SmilerBadass Bookworm Loveable RogueGentleman Thief (* cough* ) to swoop in from out of nowhere, take her on adventures, and have a month or two of dancing around the issue before jumping her, as he would be the perfect guy to by-pass both defense-mechanisms. Yeah, there... really aren't any therapists for this


every other phrase is a link. also... holy fuck. this is one of the more tame ones, too. it's cows all the way down.

I MEAN FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK.

http://web.archive.org/web/20100719...ki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/ICallHimMisterHappy

THAT entire page.

it STARTS with:


  • This troper has not invented a name for his equipment though his friends refer to it as Ryu because, according to one of my friends who is of Japanese descent, that is the word for dragon in Japan and she always thought the image of an Eastern Dragon looked very phallic. My GF on the other hand collectively refers to hers as Asmodea. One guess where she got that from.

"i don't have a silly name for my dick, but my friends do"
 
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Troper Tales: Big Ol Unibrow

"I'm putting this one first to give good advice to anybody out there feeling self-conscious about their unibrow who needs a good way to turn it into a type II. Just walk up to anybody and tell them, "Want to see me raise one eyebrow?" It works best when you do it completely out of the blue. If somebody decides to call you on it, you can then push the envelope by saying "Well, you can't expect me to raise half an eyebrow" - unless you do know how to, in which case that's a Crowning Moment Of Awesome And Funny in one."

:autism:

TroperTales: Potty Failure

"Once when I was at an internet cafe (Rivalution Studios to be exact, if anyone ever heard of that West Coast franchise) and I was so into the game I was playing (Battlefield: Vietnam) and concerned that someone in the crowded cafe would take my computer, that I held in my bladder and came to the ultimatum that I needed to use the restroom pronto after about a few hours. I told my friend to watch my seat and walked as quickly as possible to the restroom. The light switch was hard to find and I was fidgeting very badly. I already started pissing myself before I could turn it on. Luckily, my pants were black... Later when my friend's mom was driving us home he mentioned that I smell weird."


http://web.archive.org/web/20100407...rg/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/PottyFailure
 
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If you guys are going to keep quoting troper tales can you put them in spoiler tags? Otherwise I'm going to fuck up my neck and shoulders cringing.
 
I apologise if this has been posted before, but watch from the time I put in the link:


Credit goes to the voice actress, she really nails it down how it would be like living with this troper.
 
resonancer said:
http://web.archive.org/web/20101231022328/http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/Tsundere

This troper is a Type B, an adaptation she developed in response to her mother, also a Type B. When her mother flips out, her deredere side goes very Emotionless Girl, prompting Mum to get even more pissed at the "Dead-Eyed-Cow Look." In daily life, she's mostly deredere, but she comes with a built-in Protective Onii-sama feature in her brain that causes her to go tsuntsun on any of the Deadpan Snarker Jerkasses she's attracted to (via a combination of strategies 2 and 3), while any Nice Guy who manages to slip through is filtered by the Protective Onee-sama feature, which takes his side and tells her she's too mean to deserve him and should just let him go. She is still hoping and praying for a Hot Blooded Stepford SmilerBadass Bookworm Loveable RogueGentleman Thief (* cough* ) to swoop in from out of nowhere, take her on adventures, and have a month or two of dancing around the issue before jumping her, as he would be the perfect guy to by-pass both defense-mechanisms. Yeah, there... really aren't any therapists for this
Click to expand...

Someone should tell this person real life is not a fucking anime.
 
http://web.archive.org/web/20101231022328/http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/Tsundere

2oJ2duG.png


37BfWwi.png


:story:
 
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I distinctly remember two of these Troper Tales:
For Big Lipped Aligator Moment, there was this one where the troper was in some sort of Middle Eastern desert in a Jeep, which was playing Middle Eastern music, and then Barbie Girl began playing on the guy's playlist!

For Cool and Unusual Punishment, a troper helped out on a teen theater parody production of 1984, and there was a scene where they updated torturing someone in a scene (I haven't read the book and I don't remember this Troper Tale exactly, so I don't know what scene this is referring to, but I think they mentioned an interrogation scene, but I can't remember exactly what they said they changed) to playing "The Most Excruciating Song" for the victim. They went through several song choices, like The Hokey Pokey, I Like To Move It, the theme song to SpongeBob Squarepants, and Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley, before finding the actual song, which was...wait for it...Friday by Rebecca Black!
 
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ColumbiaBinks said:
For Cool and Unusual Punishment, a troper helped out on a teen theater parody production of 1984, and there was a scene where they updated torturing someone in a scene (I haven't read the book and I don't remember this Troper Tale exactly, so I don't know what scene this is referring to, but I think they mentioned an interrogation scene, but I can't remember exactly what they said they changed) to playing "The Most Excruciating Song" for the victim. They went through several song choices, like I Like To Move It, the theme song to SpongeBob Squarepants, and Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley, before finding the actual song, which was...wait for it...Friday by Rebecca Black!
Click to expand...

I hate Millennials.

Edit:
If you haven't read the book, you should know the interrogation scene is the story's climax and is one of the most unsettling moments in the whole thing.
 
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You guys should've seen the Perverse Sexual Lust Troper Tales pages. It was a glorious trainwreck of autism.
 
Triggered Fivehead said:
TroperTales: Potty Failure

"Once when I was at an internet cafe (Rivalution Studios to be exact, if anyone ever heard of that West Coast franchise) and I was so into the game I was playing (Battlefield: Vietnam) and concerned that someone in the crowded cafe would take my computer, that I held in my bladder and came to the ultimatum that I needed to use the restroom pronto after about a few hours. I told my friend to watch my seat and walked as quickly as possible to the restroom. The light switch was hard to find and I was fidgeting very badly. I already started pissing myself before I could turn it on. Luckily, my pants were black... Later when my friend's mom was driving us home he mentioned that I smell weird."


http://web.archive.org/web/20100407...rg/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperTales/PottyFailure
Click to expand...
They couldn't have just taken the laptop with them and held it while they pissed? It's awkward but it beats getting it stolen, or pissing yourself, by a country mile.
 
Phantom Dusclops 92: I just discovered Clay Claymore and his commentary on The Mysterious Mr. Enter's videos, enjoying his commentary on how much Enter overreacts to stuff... until I got to "MysteriousMrEnter GO (the fuck away)!", his commentary on Enter's "The Return of Slade" review. As usual, he goes to notice that Enter overreacts, makes unfunny jokes and stuff... until he goes out of border saying that all the shows Enter said he likes in the review (Gravity Falls, Steven Universe, Star vs. the Forces of Evil and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic) are overrated crap, basically saying that if you like any of these shows, you're an overreacting manchild. I find that offensive.

Looks like someone didn't get what Clay meant by manchild.

Ry Rodrigo: While Street Fighter V was, by no means, a terrible game, it still says a lot that I consider it the low point of the series, for several reasons. For starters, Capcom charging the full retail price of $60 for a bare-bones presentation in February annoyed me a lot, since rival game Mortal Kombat X gave you a healthy roster, an arcade mode and a fleshed out story mode, all of which are absent in the debut of Street Fighter V. And when Capcom finally got around to creating a Story Mode? It was the most stupidly written nonsense I have ever seen, the biggest sticking point would be that the most prominent terrorist organization in the Street Fighter world is invaded by a bunch of eccentric yahoos in costumes no less than three times in the story, and not once does Bison do more than send five unarmed guards to fight them in hand-to-hand combat. Did it ever not occur to him to, I don't know....'give his soldiers guns? Oh sure, Avrile carries guns, but she stupidly empties her clip into Birdie's obviously bulletproof chains. And you would think that Shadaloo, moving forward with their doomsday device, would have stationed at least a hundred armed guards in the main control room to make sure nothing goes wrong, right? Surprise! A sweeping shot shows it completely EMPTY, allowing for Rashid to cripple it at a crucial time with the help of a six year old girl! Did it not ever occur to F.A.N.G. (himself a flipping moron) to install a fail-safe or a backup that wouldn't be thwarted by a pre-schooler? All of this makes me believe that Bison gave up on world domination ages ago, but just carried out the Dark Moon project just to screw with everyone. Fighting game wise, the game also makes the very odd decision of making several characters play nothing like how they used to in the other games unless they used the V-Trigger......so why in the hell am I activating a super mode to get back moves my character should have by default? Juri is the worst offender of this, nearly all of her trademark moves are GONE. She might as well not be in the game at all if that was the case! Also, one last thing - Capcom drew me in with the fanservice (yes, I'll admit that freely) and then proceeded to take it all away by getting rid of the jiggle physics, nipple details and covering up Juri's costume. Nice going, Crapcom. This entry in the series caused your company's flagship fighting game to de-evolve from a staple in tournaments to a laughingstock.

I have no words for this...
 
8waifoofever8 said:
Phantom Dusclops 92: I just discovered Clay Claymore and his commentary on The Mysterious Mr. Enter's videos, enjoying his commentary on how much Enter overreacts to stuff... until I got to "MysteriousMrEnter GO (the fuck away)!", his commentary on Enter's "The Return of Slade" review. As usual, he goes to notice that Enter overreacts, makes unfunny jokes and stuff... until he goes out of border saying that all the shows Enter said he likes in the review (Gravity Falls, Steven Universe, Star vs. the Forces of Evil and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic) are overrated crap, basically saying that if you like any of these shows, you're an overreacting manchild. I find that offensive.

Looks like someone didn't get what Clay meant by manchild.
Click to expand...
Well he's not wrong about people being over reacting menchildren judging from this guys response.
 
8waifoofever8 said:
Ry Rodrigo: While Street Fighter V was, by no means, a terrible game, it still says a lot that I consider it the low point of the series, for several reasons. For starters, Capcom charging the full retail price of $60 for a bare-bones presentation in February annoyed me a lot, since rival game Mortal Kombat X gave you a healthy roster, an arcade mode and a fleshed out story mode, all of which are absent in the debut of Street Fighter V. And when Capcom finally got around to creating a Story Mode? It was the most stupidly written nonsense I have ever seen, the biggest sticking point would be that the most prominent terrorist organization in the Street Fighter world is invaded by a bunch of eccentric yahoos in costumes no less than three times in the story, and not once does Bison do more than send five unarmed guards to fight them in hand-to-hand combat. Did it ever not occur to him to, I don't know....'give his soldiers guns? Oh sure, Avrile carries guns, but she stupidly empties her clip into Birdie's obviously bulletproof chains. And you would think that Shadaloo, moving forward with their doomsday device, would have stationed at least a hundred armed guards in the main control room to make sure nothing goes wrong, right? Surprise! A sweeping shot shows it completely EMPTY, allowing for Rashid to cripple it at a crucial time with the help of a six year old girl! Did it not ever occur to F.A.N.G. (himself a flipping moron) to install a fail-safe or a backup that wouldn't be thwarted by a pre-schooler? All of this makes me believe that Bison gave up on world domination ages ago, but just carried out the Dark Moon project just to screw with everyone. Fighting game wise, the game also makes the very odd decision of making several characters play nothing like how they used to in the other games unless they used the V-Trigger......so why in the hell am I activating a super mode to get back moves my character should have by default? Juri is the worst offender of this, nearly all of her trademark moves are GONE. She might as well not be in the game at all if that was the case! Also, one last thing - Capcom drew me in with the fanservice (yes, I'll admit that freely) and then proceeded to take it all away by getting rid of the jiggle physics, nipple details and covering up Juri's costume. Nice going, Crapcom. This entry in the series caused your company's flagship fighting game to de-evolve from a staple in tournaments to a laughingstock.

I have no words for this...
Click to expand...

I'm going to try to parse this autistic butthurt.

Ry Rodrigo: While Street Fighter V was, by no means, a terrible game, it still says a lot that I consider it the low point of the series, for several reasons. For starters, Capcom charging the full retail price of $60 for a bare-bones presentation in February annoyed me a lot, since rival game Mortal Kombat X gave you a healthy roster, an arcade mode and a fleshed out story mode, all of which are absent in the debut of Street Fighter V.

Okay, legit gripe, they did charge a stupid amount for a shell of game when it first came out, still is kinda overpriced.

And when Capcom finally got around to creating a Story Mode? It was the most stupidly written nonsense I have ever seen, the biggest sticking point would be that the most prominent terrorist organization in the Street Fighter world is invaded by a bunch of eccentric yahoos in costumes no less than three times in the story, and not once does Bison do more than send five unarmed guards to fight them in hand-to-hand combat. Did it ever not occur to him to, I don't know....'give his soldiers guns? Oh sure, Avrile carries guns, but she stupidly empties her clip into Birdie's obviously bulletproof chains. And you would think that Shadaloo, moving forward with their doomsday device, would have stationed at least a hundred armed guards in the main control room to make sure nothing goes wrong, right? Surprise! A sweeping shot shows it completely EMPTY, allowing for Rashid to cripple it at a crucial time with the help of a six year old girl! Did it not ever occur to F.A.N.G. (himself a flipping moron) to install a fail-safe or a backup that wouldn't be thwarted by a pre-schooler? All of this makes me believe that Bison gave up on world domination ages ago, but just carried out the Dark Moon project just to screw with everyone.

tl;dr, story was fucking retarded, lol, calm down, dude.

Fighting game wise, the game also makes the very odd decision of making several characters play nothing like how they used to in the other games unless they used the V-Trigger......so why in the hell am I activating a super mode to get back moves my character should have by default? Juri is the worst offender of this, nearly all of her trademark moves are GONE. She might as well not be in the game at all if that was the case!

Okay, we get it, they changed shit, it pissed you off.

Also, one last thing - Capcom drew me in with the fanservice (yes, I'll admit that freely) and then proceeded to take it all away by getting rid of the jiggle physics, nipple details and covering up Juri's costume. Nice going, Crapcom. This entry in the series caused your company's flagship fighting game to de-evolve from a staple in tournaments to a laughingstock.

Nice powerleveling. And if really pisses you off that much, that's what adult mods and Sourcemaker porno is for, you thirsty autist.
 
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