Let's Sperg Total War Warhammer 3: The Ogre Kingdoms Let's play.

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

"This was once a world of purity and splendour. An ice-clad jewel in the heavens, slowly nurtured into a paradise by beings older than Time." - The 8th ancient codex of battle

This world is no longer that world, purity and splendor has been replaced by Horror and War.



Bloodthirsters of Khorne rage across the lands, collecting Blood for the Blood God.



Unclean Beasts spread blight and plague.


The Empires of man, once forged into a mighty force by Sigmar have splintered, Beastmen, Vampires, Skaven and The Ancient Tomb Lords all run rampant across the world with impunity. However the greatest threat to Mankind lies far to the east of where The Empire of Man struggles, Near the walled of bastions of the legendary Cathay, in the Mountains of Mourn near the Ivory Pass lie the Ogre Kingdoms, where the biggest, smelliest, meanest fighters that have ever lived reside.

Of those, only the Fattest and Meanest become leaders, known as Tyrants, our Hero is one of those Tyrants, He is infact the Biggest, Fattiest...Meanest and most Foul Smelling of the Tyrants, a True Fat Ass among Fatasses.



GREESUS GUNT-TOOTH, now this isn't a great shot of our OverLord, so lets get a closer look at him.




Vile, Absolutely Horrible isn't he.



We begin our Campaign to not just be the Fattest Gunt in all the Ogre Kingdoms, but the Fattest Gunt in all the world here, in the eastern portion of the map, but lets zoom into our immediate area.



: Gawd Dammit it's one of those GOD DAMN AWLOGS, they ruined the Great Casa De Gunt.



Our Hero Races is wheeled in his cart over to the offending invaders.

"Oh shit, Its the Fattest Fucking Ogre in existence"

: THATS NOT TWUE, THIS IS ALL MUSCLE





Total Warhammer 3 mixes it's genre's a little bit, the over-map is a turn based 4X game, this is the overall map that we will be fighting on, I would show off more details but it is better to just wait for a real fight instead of the tutorial one. Like say



Reclaiming our Rage Pig's home.

 

[KeekeeMewmew]

I have 1 and 2 on steam and enjoyed messing around on them years ago, I have 3 on gamepass it is worth buying it on steam to be able to play (if i remember correctly) new mortal empires that released in the past couple months?

 

[Punished Lobsterchu]

You better name one of your Tyrants Boogie.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

I have 1 and 2 on steam and enjoyed messing around on them years ago, I have 3 on gamepass it is worth buying it on steam to be able to play (if i remember correctly) new mortal empires that released in the past couple months?

If you have 1 and 2 you get all of those factions as part of the Immortal Empires and LARP the end times. (the name for the version with all 3 sets of maps smushed together)

You better name one of your Tyrants Boogie.

You mean having a bunch of giant fat Lolcows as the Ogre Empire

>.> I WOULD NEVER THINK OF IT.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

So apparently I forgot how getting Goldtooth Halls worked because I don't have a replay for claiming the keep so I guess it must not have had a garrison in it.

That or it had so little of a Garrison that I just Auto Resolved it, I don't quite remember.



Well anyways, Lets look at one of the big mechanics behind Ogre Tyrants.

Each Ogre Tyrant can use one Big Name at a time to gain additional abilities or buffs, by winning a fight against another Ogre Faction I earned the Hoardmaster Big name, This ability gives pretty hefty leadership buff Leadership is the Grey bar under most units, when that bar is emptied they break and run from the battle from the time, it is decreased by...a big old list of shit

• Encirclement: A unit attacked from more than one side will lose resolve much faster than if only engaged from the front. Use rear ranks to encircle and attack. See flanking.
• Cavalry charges: Several hundred kilograms of horse, rider, and armor crashing into someone will put a dent in morale. Shock cavalry excels at breaking enemy lines unless they can defend themselves with spears or halberds.
• Spears or Halberds usually have the ability Charge Defense Large (CDL). Troops with CDL may brace facing an on coming charge from large entities such as cavalry or monsters. When they do so they negate the beneficial impacts of the charging attack.
• Elite troops have the ability Charge Defense All (CDA). Troops with CDA may brace facing an on coming charge from any entity large or small. When they do so they negate the beneficial impacts of the charging attack.
• Lords falling in battle. This has enough impact to potentially send the whole army packing.
• Terror and fear - effects on certain units which lower enemy leadership
  • Terror = unit has a chance to cause a large reduction in leadership when it charges. This effects enemy units in an AOE. This reduction is temporary.
  • Fear = slightly reduce the leadership of enemy units nearby (constant effect).
• Having low vigour (ie: being tired/exhausted).
• If faster or stronger units are nearby.
• If flanks are secured by nearby allied troops.
• Spells can temporarily buff or debuff leadership.
• If the unit has taken damage. Damage sustained impacts leadership both in quantity of damage and how fast it has impacted the unit.
• If a blow is decisive enough (fast and powerful) it can waiver an enemy unit's moral causing them to flee.
• When a unit wavers whatever command you are performing is dropped.

If you break a unit enough times in a singular battle they will actually completely rout and flee the battle entirely. So having a high leadership value will in the very least keep my battle lines from falling apart as easily.

So now that Our Fat Ass leader has his home base back it is time to end our turn and build up our army. Of course this allows all the other 200ish factions take their turn, and some even try to initiate diplomacy with our Rage Pig Ogre



: WHAT YOU DIRTY RATS WANT MY MONEY, FUCK YOU, I AM THE RALPHA OGRE YOU SHOULD BE PAYING ME



Aww YEAH, this is what I am talking about, Five star days are a commin



Now this one..RP wise the Rage Pig would hollar at because it requires payment but this one is so low that I am taking it anyways, because I am The Clown God and get to Veto our Gunted Hero once in a while if he makes a particularly stupid choice. Just pretend he is buying some drugs, Gunttooth's turn comes back around and we get the Other major special mechanic of the Ogre Kingdoms



Warhammer Fantasy Ogres are Mercenaries at heart, as such you will occasionally get the ability to chose various missions for bonuses. Sadly we can't complete any of these because we really don't have the ability to get to these places and characters safely, but I promise we will do some once our territory is stabilized.


Speaking as such our great Gunted Overtyrant has been making his way to the last settlement to take over the province, which will grant us some special bonuses.


Now this battle initially seems very one sided, but the enemy will very quickly receive reinforcements from the Units Garrisoned in the Camp itself.



Our Mighty Ogre-Weight forces advance towards the enemy line...



Meanwhile our Opponents TURN THE FUCK AROUND LIKE THE STUPID FAT FAGGOTS THEY ARE.



They are quite obviously trying to meet up with the reinforcements




They almost get there, but have to turn around before fully meeting up with their friends.



I guess we have to have the Obligatory image while we are fighting other Ogres



Our Dear Over Tyrant gets wheeled by the Cozy Rosies to the front lines and enters the fight in the only way he knows how while the Rosies take the fight to the enemy army.





Guntius does get in on the action, in a way only he can...Vehicular Manslaughter, Mowing down an opposing pack of Rosies.





Not long after the Enemy leader falls...with Absolutely no aid from our Begunted Overtyrant, if you read the list of things that really fuck with Morale above you will notice that losing your army's leader will absolutely demolish morale levels, once the leader falls here the entire enemy army decides to fucking rout, granting an instant victory, giving us control of the province.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Now that our Great Gunted Overtyrant controls a a few settlements, lets cover some of the actual civilizational mechanics behind the game.'



This is an Ogre Camp, it is the effective replacement for the Capital Settlements for the Ogre Factions in Total War Warhammer 3. Ogre's don't get to build capitals up like many of the factions do, instead they set up Camps. They act not only as Recruitment Hubs for armies, but project an aura that grants all armies within Meat each turn, and well Ogres are fat motherfuckers so if they start to go out of range of Camps that grant them meat they start to starve pretty fast.

I would link a full list of what buildings we can build here for people to peruse but I can't fucking find one because apparently the Ogre Kingdoms are so loathed to play as among the (((COMMUNITY))) that nobody has bothered to put it on the fucking Wiki.

The TDLR version is "Buildings good, Buildings make Gold, Let us make stronger Units and Make more Meat" when I build a special building I will show it off, which one should be close to unlocking since we have had Casa De Gunt for a few turns.



This is the Ogre's Tech Tree, It's pretty straight forwards and I typically go straight for things that boost the economy because a stronger economy means more armies, and this fucking map is god damn huge so I want my armies to be as big and powerful as possible.

Total Warhammer Planner

A tool for planning/sharing Lord and Hero skill builds in Total Warhammer

totalwarhammerplanner.com

That is a link of everything that can eventually be researched, it's actually pretty small, and pretty simple. Just for reference some factions get some pretty cool tech tree shit like Here is the Court of Kislev, who have really large offshoot trees based on Major Cities that belong to the faction.



I actually think it's pretty cool that not every faction just has a direct ladder tech tree.



So here is our big fat drugged up Ralpha Male of an Ogre again, The Lords and Heroes got some RPG shit going on, we got Various Equipment and special non-combat followers called Ancillaries that basically provide minor bonuses for our army, as well as a whole bunch of random passives that you obtain based on actions your lord takes, even being able to get special ones if a Lord defeats a Legendary Lore character.

For instance if someone manages to kill our big boss man they get a pemenant bonus called Cashing out, which increases income from Trade and Income from buildings for the province that lord is hanging out in.



As part of gaining control of the Local provinces, we did get an Epic special Quest Mace that Only Guntooth himself can weild.


Of course being an RPG each level we get gives us a skill point to gradually boost up our Lord's combat and leadership prowess as well as his stats.

Total Warhammer Planner

A tool for planning/sharing Lord and Hero skill builds in Total Warhammer

totalwarhammerplanner.com

There is a list of skills, Typically I go for the things that Reduce Recruitment and Army Upkeep first because I am a Fucking Kike Jew in games like this.

With all of that out of the way, it is time to head back north to claim the rest of the immediate area,



Within two turns we take the basically undefended Amble Peak and Vale of the Titans, unfortunately Malbob doesn't put up enough of a fight to deserve much talking about, because Malbob would make a Great MovieBob gag but his army couldn't even kill a single unit of Goblars in an auto resolve, but not all is great in the land of Greesus, as we consolidate power in the north east..a power from even further north randomly declares war on us and comes barreling down like a boulder.



: Hey Ralph, Guess what time it is? Daddy Jim is checking in, and I brought a full on Sweetie Squad WAAAAAGH with me, I know you got some Cigs and Booze in this Dwarven City.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Update 4: DADDY JIM DOESN'T LOVE US.

Last time our Great Over Tyrant solidified his old over his Domain, and began to not only upgrade his camps, but he strengthened the tiny Cities that Ogres can build which at least provides the economy and gives us some more materials to trade, however a Dark Shadow Loomed our Ogre nation, the Drums of War began to beat and soon we are under attack by a full on WAAAAAAGH




"Hey there GuntTooth, How's it going These are some nice cities...got any empty Pillbottles in em?"




Not only does our fortified underground city gets besieged, one of our newly captured camps gets directly assaulted, Thankfully our Overtyrant and his army is at this one ready to throw off the invading Sweeties.



Orc WAAAAAGGHHHS are kind of a really pissy thing, they temporarily provide all the orc armies with reinforcements that will eventually arrive in each battle. I deploy our little Rosy Gnoblars so that they can eventually flank our enemy army which is lead by a spellcaster, not a high level Shaman so I shouldn't have to worry about any Giant spells being thrown around, we have a spellcaster of our own in this group now so I will show off a fire spell if I can manage to hit. (Spoiler : I am not too good with the spells so far My Main Campaign Playthrough was with Boris URSUS and he wasn't exactly a spellcaster)



The Ogres prove much faster than the Gnoblars, I kind of am not sure why Gnoblars exist they aren't fast enough to soak a bunch of fucking damage before the main force arrives, and they don't do much on their own, I have one group of Bulls move around the lines to crash into a group of Bow using Orks.



With Predictable results, fucking Ogres are great at punting smaller enemies in very satisfying ways.



The Battle Lines become clear as the enemy Reinforcements arrive, You can see the Commander Shaman hiding in the trees, we will get to him once we free up some units.



Kind of like that, The Goblin can't even stand up to the knees of our Bulls, fucking Greenskin Manlet.



After failing like 4 times to throw magic on the enemy units I finally decide that I should not be a Retard and just throw fireballs at the enemy Archers, since they like to stay clumped up. Incidentally the enemy Morale broke right after this spell landed, apparently the Goblins don't like to be turned into Tasty Crispy Greenskins.



With the smaller force pushed back, I decide to pull Gunttooth back, His unit will most certainly be required to break a siege that has lasted long enough to cause the city to rebel and spawn a Rebel Dwarven army (who insanely attack the Goblin force and get completely wiped LOL AI) But the Eastern front is not finished.



Another wave of Greenskins strike at The Vale of Titans, putting pressure on an already wounded army.



I set aside any real attempts at tactics in the early battle, I want to attempt to break the enemy forces before reinforcements arrive (I fail horribly at this)



The Ogre Bulls begin things in their normal fashion, this time he got some good hang time on the first fucker they launched.



I get a real blast with a Rain of fire spell.



AND A FLAMING SKULL, EAT SHIT GREENSKINS.



I send the Gnoblars into the archers to at least keep them from peppering the Ogre lines.


The Overtyrant finds himself in the middle of one big green mosh pit, he hangs well but eventually has to retreat.



Low health, no Morale...TIME TO GO GET SOME ZANNIES AND TAKE A NAP


Until an errant magic spell thwacks him from behind.



Didn't think I would have to bust this out so soon..but Our Beloved Overtyrant is down for the count.



Our forces get revenge for our Gunt's downfall, breaking the army and driving them off again, however given that our Lord is out for the count, we need a new Tyrant to hold the troops together while he recovers...and for the counter attack we are going to need ourselves another army so time for two more Tyrants to step up..which means we need two of the meantest, Fattest Fuckers around.

: "Wassup Overtyrant of the Ogre Kingdoms Boogie1488 Here ready to throw my weight around in the name of the Great Maw"

: "HAI OGURLS...YOU READY FOR SOME MAW-SLIM BEEZE?"