To start off, I'm drunk. Not blacked out or falling down drunk, but I'm definitely drunk. I've made ramen drunk a hundred times, what's the worst that could happen?
I live and drink alone in the worst apartment complex in town. As I sit half passed out in my Lay-Z-Boy I hear the Mexican kids outside playing their favorite game, "throw gravel at the building".
I start to feel hungry and decide to make a pot of ramen. So I do.
Ramen's done and I am hungry. I grab the pot off the stove and head to the Lay-Z-Boy. I eat that shit right out of the pot because I am a lazy bastard and don't want to use any additional dishes. I attempt to sit down with the pot and it goes poorly. I spill boiling hot water all over my lap.
I'm struggling to get my pants off since they're soaked in scalding hot water. I get my pants off and run to the bathroom and look in the mirror.
Doesn't look too bad...
Hours later my entire upper thigh is a blister. Like, yo, bigger that the span of my hand. All the fluid in the blister has accumulated at the bottom because gravity obviously, so I have this giant blister with a pouch of fucking nasty stuff bulging out at the bottom.
I could go to the hospital, but what are they going to do? Lance and debride the wound and then clean and dress it. So I decide to do that myself.
I take a pin and Oh My God... I took a pin and punctured the skin and it was like I turned on a faucet. Serous liquid came pouring out like nobody's business. After that was done I limped to the store and got ointment and gauze. I applied antibiotic ointment and gauze.
Now I'm perfectly fine with no scarring and didn't spend thousands of dollars at the ER.
So just remember that ramen is no joke and only adults 21+ should enjoy ramen responsibly.