% At the KBBL radio station, the disc jockeys do moronic news jokes
accompanied by bad sound effects.
Bill: Hey, Springfield, if you're driving, you may want to sit
down!
Marty: Uh, oh! Because it's time for Bill and Marty's Five
O'clock News Flush! [toilet flushing sound plays]
Bill: Our topless story: President Clinton has launched a new
website!
Marty: Uh, oh! Wait, let me guess ... www.[wolf-
whistle].[boing!]!
Homer: [listening in his car, laughing] Website.
Bill: Okay, here's another News Flush! [toilet flush sound]
Doctors say the life expectancy of the average man is now
seventy-six point two years!
Homer: [gasps and spins his car out across the highway ] Seventy-
six point two? But I'm already thirty-eight point one!
I've wasted half my life! [exits car, walks across
highway] Half my life gone, and I'm only guaranteed thirty
eight more years!
[Homer walks over to a highway phone after nearly being
struck by several passing cars, and picks up the receiver]
Marge, I've wasted half my life!
Operator: Sir, do you need a tow truck?
Homer: What are you talking about, Marge? I don't need a ...
[behind him, another car collides with the one he left on
the highway]
Okay, send the truck.
-- "The Wizard of Evergreen Terrace"