The Game Oversimplification Thread - Take any game and intentionally make it sound boring

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You are a nameless security officer stationed in a space ship, you can only go through terminals to learn more as to what happened, on board are AIs as well.
 
You amass wealth power and children as you fuck your sister around europe india and africa.
 
You try to convince your brother and friends that isekai is bad by being a fugitive and stealing everything that isn't boots
 
The Shadow said:
Overworked security guard finds a side gig in IT
Click to expand...
Human Revolution, I'm right, right?
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1. Four ne'er-do-wells descend a mountain and break a magic cube.
2. Rich Evans is an amorphous blob of cancer with no friends.
3. Amnesiac slaughters cute critters, eats doritos and leaves his friends to die on an island.
 
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A church near a small village is filled with eldritch horrors and a former mad ruler.
 
You bust a drug fueled orgy disguised as a rowdy costume party.
 
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