The Cole Smithey Thread

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China and Crystal said:
Kind of late but did Cole say anything about the Lego Movie? I wanna see how it compared with Chris' amazingly analytic one.
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Queen of Tarts said:
If he does, you can imagine the review will be insufferably pretentious and condescending.

It's interesting comparing the two. Both are pompous pricks, but it's something when you have some smarts like Cole and are far more unlikable than our "esteemed" creator of Sonichu.
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http://www.colesmithey.com/reviews/2014/02/the-lego-movie.html
 
Speaking of, when Chris went to see that movie, he actually brought all of his Legos with him. At one point he got up and jumped into the screen because he thought the movie was real and he'd get free Legos. This is a true story.
 
Queen of Tarts said:
Wow, a B-. I guess they're not so different in some ways after all.
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"However, one obvious area the movie lacks is in its white-bread depiction of society. Morgan Freeman’s character doesn’t even have dark skin. What’s up with that?"

ha ha ha, oh wow.
 
Cole doesn't write what he thinks. Cole writes what he really hopes his peers want to read. And naturally he comes across as a poseur. Chris is a better writer, because he writes what he darn well thinks.
 
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It's like he went to K-Mart and bought a film critic Halloween costume. But I guess that when you're the spitting image of the mother you hate, it kind of messes with you.
 
CompyRex said:
Speaking of, when Chris went to see that movie, he actually brought all of his Legos with him. At one point he got up and jumped into the screen because he thought the movie was real and he'd get free Legos. This is a true story.
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Bullshit that requires more athletic prowess and competence than Chris is capable of.
 
KillerKarlKox said:
I just think his website title came from when he went back home for Chris's 18th birthday.

"Hmmm, Yeah, Cole, yer the smartest film critic in tha whole world."
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Actually a director refered to him as that in a sarcastic manner when cole was the only person to give that director's movie a good review. Once I find the link again, I'll post it
 
CatParty said:
Actually a director refered to him as that in a sarcastic manner when cole was the only person to give that director's movie a good review. Once I find the link again, I'll post it
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It makes my head hurt thinking about it.

It's supposed to be sarcastic...

... but you know deep down that Cole believes it's true, that he is the smartest critics in the world.

He wouldn't have such bile if he didn't have a massive inferiority complex.
 
Goodbad Girl said:
Taken from Coleslaw's official "fan page":

View attachment 4674

Wife = :tugboat:[CONFIRMED]
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Awesome. Assuming Cole would need to make $40,000/year to get by (a ludicrously lowball figure by NYC standards) there's no way his reviews would be pulling in that kind of money. He's either lying (which shouldn't be ruled out, he's a Weston after all) or he's riding his Sugar Mama's gravy train.
 
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