Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

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Kokorengo said:
Is it possible to get an injury as serious as that just lying in a couch for years?
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It's basically Osteoarthritis and due to the bones having no cushion they are going to deteriorate no matter what due to normal movement. The joint just needs to move enough times. So even if he is laying on a couch the act of moving his head will eventually create spurs, chips and swelling due to the bone on bone contact. It's not a stress injury or anything.

The only way to stop it would be to somehow be completely immobile forever. Which I'm sure he made the best possible attempt at achieving.

I kinda want to call him a pussy for going to the ER for a pinched nerve though. Fucker is on IVs and shit. If this is still at the point where he is just finding out about it and discovering the problem exists then what is he going to do when this gets worse. The surgeries are only to address symptoms and remove fluid and chips and the only other thing they can do is physical therapy.
 
His current 'woe is me' posts are fucking hilarious as he bemoans how goons hate little ol' him

"Well the forums, over the years, have gone from having fun and pride about being a goon, to poking fun at being a goon, to outright hating goons, to outright hating me when I'm either on the forums or not on the forums. I just post and interact in places that are fun for me, and I've found that the interactions I've had on these forums the last few times I've posted, haven't been all that fun, and I'm treated way more differently (and not in a positive way) than an average user. On Twitter, although it's a shithole full of racist and self righteous morons, I don't get nearly as much crap as I do here, which is why I've been sticking around there, because the last thing I need in my life is more drama.

So anyway I'll be fine, don't worry about me, and everything will work out. Thanks again for the support!"
 
Steve Morris Lincoln said:
His current 'woe is me' posts are fucking hilarious as he bemoans how goons hate little ol' him

"Well the forums, over the years, have gone from having fun and pride about being a goon, to poking fun at being a goon, to outright hating goons, to outright hating me when I'm either on the forums or not on the forums.
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Well, I wonder why that is? Maybe it's because you're the one that made it cool to shit on your own userbase? From lowballing content creators, to having wacky zany ban weeks, to not shipping merch, to not having paid forum features that work, to creating Helldump, to putting life losers in charge of your forums, to buying a nice house, a fancy car, and lavish nerd baubles all while pleading poverty? And on top of all that, you ban anyone who dares to criticize the way you run your business.

You chased the quick buck, and you didn't have the brains to cash your chips when you had the chance, and all you got left are a bunch of broke brain catladies and troons that can't even pay their own fuckin' medical bills, let alone yours!
 
BALLZ-BROKEN said:
Well, I wonder why that is? Maybe it's because you're the one that made it cool to shit on your own userbase? From lowballing content creators, to having wacky zany ban weeks, to not shipping merch, to not having paid forum features that work, to creating Helldump, to putting life losers in charge of your forums, to buying a nice house, a fancy car, and lavish nerd baubles all while pleading poverty? And on top of all that, you ban anyone who dares to criticize the way you run your business.

You chased the quick buck, and you didn't have the brains to cash your chips when you had the chance, and all you got left are a bunch of broke brain catladies and troons that can't even pay their own fuckin' medical bills, let alone yours!
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Lowtax lost interest in the forums around 2005 give or take a year. The difference between the forums and the other hundred things he’s tried and quit at is the forums made money. He gave the keys to the to ozma and her crew and they slowly drove it off a cliff. It wasn’t until things got so bad that forums were making less than a full time fast food employee did he bother to say wtf is going on.
 
He hasn't not only lost interest, he has more or less open contempt for goons because they don't line up to suck his dick whenever he shows up anymore. Also at this point even the most zealous goons realize that he doesn't give a shit about the forums and that he also is powerless against his own staff so people make fun of him. That is what bothers him, yet he's too spineless to do anything about it. What is so infuriating about this is that the guy could be a millionaire now if he wasn't such a lazy, bumbling baby.

Lowtax also always acts like he carries the burden of keeping the forums running no matter the cost, but in reality the very day they turn into a net-loss for him, he'd shut them down without as much as a prior notice. That's why he tried/tries to get another internet moneymaking scheme running, so he could finally leave SA behind. It's not gonna happening because he's a middle-aged man with the mindset of a lazy, spoiled teenage brat.

Also the SA community is pure shit at this point. Here's a nice drinking game for you: When some poster drops the info that he's female apropos of nothing, check the post history. 9 out of 10 times it's a tranny. Goons have this tendency to completely over-share about their life and a ton of them are bitter, alcoholic computer janitors. Some find trannyism as a way to reinvent themselves and they join the cult then. Nothing about this spells the word "funny" or "interesting".
 
jace821 said:
Lowtax is back warming up the goons for the gofundme

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lmao what a pussy. That post reads so pathetic. Who the fuck lets mean words on the internet deter them from posting shit... on their own forums? You already ban everyone who disagrees with you, you'd think that he'd at least get some satisfaction out of that, but no, he's so fucking petty and insecure that even after banning them he rolls over in his sleep about it.

I can't say I feel one bit bad about Lowtax's health problems, given how much he enjoyed ripping people off in the past.
 
Harbinger of Kali Yuga said:
Who the fuck lets mean words on the internet deter them from posting shit... on their own forums?
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I think Lowtax has this problem where he wants to be a "Cool Web 1.0 Comedy Legend" or something and thinks these old autistic pant shitting troons at SA are the height of comedy and hipness.

The FYAD syndrome, if you will.
 
Harbinger of Kali Yuga said:
lmao what a pussy. That post reads so pathetic. Who the fuck lets mean words on the internet deter them from posting shit... on their own forums? You already ban everyone who disagrees with you, you'd think that he'd at least get some satisfaction out of that, but no, he's so fucking petty and insecure that even after banning them he rolls over in his sleep about it.

I can't say I feel one bit bad about Lowtax's health problems, given how much he enjoyed ripping people off in the past.
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I know the term beta is overused these days, buts that a perfect descriptor for Lowtax. He gets cucked off his own forums and then whines that the userbase is mean to him. If hed go into the forums and act like Mr. big dick alpha hed probably get more respect. Who fucking cares what a bunch of pathetic goons think about you? What does he have to lose at this point.

But alas he is a true beta and its not in his nature to be a man.
 
Dishing it out but not being able to take it is a hallmark of the goon. Low t blames his user base for the decline in forums revenue. He has never once acknowledged it might be his and his moderator’s fault.
 
Harbinger of Kali Yuga said:
I can't say I feel one bit bad about Lowtax's health problems, given how much he enjoyed ripping people off in the past.
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And you know if the situation was reversed and Notch was the one in the hospital for whatever reason, LowT would be the first one on the Tweeter crackin' jokes about the fat neckbeard nazi eating himself to death. Since it's LowT, he's gonna start blubbering about goons making him feel uncomfortable.

WAAAAHHH why are you pants shitters so mean to me?
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WAAAHHHH Lichard you bad ex-husbano! Child support payment two month late!
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jace821 said:
Dishing it out but not being able to take it is a hallmark of the goon. Low t blames his user base for the decline in forums revenue. He has never once acknowledged it might be his and his moderator’s fault.
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Just saw an interaction that was the perfect exemplar of your quote. Can you imagine the butthurt and bans that would flow if a Christian did something similar to one of those pathetic dweebs? It's like they still can't get over that Mom and Dad wouldn't let them skip church or watch R-rated movies when they were 10.
 

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Lowtax only returns to the forums when he's bottoming out on booze and pills, does some incredibly stupid shit, posts 6 site-wide stickies begging for money, and leaves again. He doesn't speak to his staff ever, he has never completed a single project he said he would, he's basically a conman at this point but the tits have run dry. Instead of taking any sort of responsibility for his hilarious bumbling of the worlds easiest job, he blames the very people who have lined his pockets for nearly 20 years.

It's a real mystery why your own userbase has lost respect for you dude.
 
dryb0nes said:
Lowtax only returns to the forums when he's bottoming out on booze and pills, does some incredibly stupid shit, posts 6 site-wide stickies begging for money, and leaves again. He doesn't speak to his staff ever, he has never completed a single project he said he would, he's basically a conman at this point but the tits have run dry. Instead of taking any sort of responsibility for his hilarious bumbling of the worlds easiest job, he blames the very people who have lined his pockets for nearly 20 years.

It's a real mystery why your own userbase has lost respect for you dude.
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Lowtax obviously no longer respects himself, so why should anyone else?
 
Ghostse said:
I'd say maybe the time in the hospital would give Lowtax time for introspection, but he'll probably just demand ambien to "help him sleep" and spend his days passed out like when he had the office. Except it'll be even better, because the bedpan means he doesn't have to get up to use the bathroom anymore.
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I hope he's so obvious about trying to get painkillers that they treat it as drug-seeking behaviour and turf him out on his arse.
 
Lowtax needs some emergency surgery. He has insurance but still has to pay $8,000 out of pocket. Maybe we'll get the migration to xenforo next year...

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