Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

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I may not be 100% on all the details as it was years ago, but it was wild. I seem to remember part of the big blowup was that the guy turned out to have a teen daughter at home the same age as the girls he was harassing as well.
 
Another goon dox that was pretty amusing was this one fundie guy who seemed alright at first. I think maybe he was Mennonite, but the only prominent Mennonite on SA was @DStecks and it wasn't him. His name was martial arts related I think. He soon got annoying and got a bunch of warnings because he signed every one of his posts with his real name. Plus he wouldn't stop talking about his wife and kids.

A bit of research and calculation was done and it was found he got with and started fucking his wife in his mid twenties and she was about 13 or 14. He was confronted and cheerfully admitted to it, and just kept digging himself deeper into a creepy hole.

He was eventually banned, but that being around 2012 during the catlady reign, I think it was ultimately because right til the end he would not stop signing his posts.
 
One of my favorite goon moments was this dude who showed up on the E/N forum lamenting his child being taken away by CPS "unfairly". As it turns out, she was found trying to walk to elementary school alone on a Saturday because her parents were asleep at 11 and she was hungry. He posted pics of his trailerhouse to prove he wasn't a bad parent. It was filled with trash, dirty furniture, and cats. Then it was discovered that he took all his scholarship money and spent it on a gaming rig, which was worth more than the trailer he lived in. He also looked like the Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.
 
MrLobe said:
One of my favorite goon moments was this dude who showed up on the E/N forum lamenting his child being taken away by CPS "unfairly". As it turns out, she was found trying to walk to elementary school alone on a Saturday because her parents were asleep at 11 and she was hungry. He posted pics of his trailerhouse to prove he wasn't a bad parent. It was filled with trash, dirty furniture, and cats. Then it was discovered that he took all his scholarship money and spent it on a gaming rig, which was worth more than the trailer he lived in. He also looked like the Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.
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CharlieMaul or something iirc. He and his wife were also blowing thousands of dollars a month on Star Wars collectibles while the kid was going hungry
 
MrLobe said:
One of my favorite goon moments was this dude who showed up on the E/N forum lamenting his child being taken away by CPS "unfairly". As it turns out, she was found trying to walk to elementary school alone on a Saturday because her parents were asleep at 11 and she was hungry. He posted pics of his trailerhouse to prove he wasn't a bad parent. It was filled with trash, dirty furniture, and cats. Then it was discovered that he took all his scholarship money and spent it on a gaming rig, which was worth more than the trailer he lived in. He also looked like the Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.
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IIRC, he eventually posted updates of him getting everything back together.
 
Chefbot said:
IIRC, he eventually posted updates of him getting everything back together.
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Yeah he turned his whole situation around and got his kid back and everything. It was one of the E/N stories that got made into a great comic in the "draw E/N threads as comics" thread. I'm trying to find it but it says I need archives. One of the best threads and it never got goldmined. Figures.
 
Chefbot said:
IIRC, he eventually posted updates of him getting everything back together.
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Yeah, dude and his wife had terrible impulse control issues and they got therapy to help with it and got the kid back after they fixed their issues. But he was in major denial for awhile
 
TiggerNits said:
CharlieMaul or something iirc. He and his wife were also blowing thousands of dollars a month on Star Wars collectibles while the kid was going hungry
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Speaking of star wars collectibles, I still want to know what happened with blue story and her autistic man child husband. Her husband had like a really good job but spent most of his paycheck on r2d2 lunchboxes to add to his hoard. Like a whole room couldn't contain it hoard. They ate out all the time because he didn't like vegetables and blue story had no idea how to cook. She had to have her hand held by goons to make a sandwich. They eventually had a baby after goons it's a bad idea.

Also that goon with the golddigger wife that stopped putting out until one night when she begged him for sex and surprise! She got pregnant, only after being really close to her co-worker.
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Dr. Studman M.D. said:
Speaking of star wars collectibles, I still want to know what happened with blue story and her autistic man child husband. Her husband had like a really good job but spent most of his paycheck on r2d2 lunchboxes to add to his hoard. Like a whole room couldn't contain it hoard. They ate out all the time because he didn't like vegetables and blue story had no idea how to cook. She had to have her hand held by goons to make a sandwich. They eventually had a baby after goons it's a bad idea.

Also that goon with the golddigger wife that stopped putting out until one night when she begged him for sex and surprise! She got pregnant, only after being really close to her co-worker.
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Goon marriages are always the best things to read about when you've had an argument with your spouse and need to realize how good you really have it and maybe forgetting to pick up the dry cleaning or not transferring money to the bill pay account on time isn't worth getting upset about
 
MrLobe said:
One of my favorite goon moments was this dude who showed up on the E/N forum lamenting his child being taken away by CPS "unfairly". As it turns out, she was found trying to walk to elementary school alone on a Saturday because her parents were asleep at 11 and she was hungry. He posted pics of his trailerhouse to prove he wasn't a bad parent. It was filled with trash, dirty furniture, and cats. Then it was discovered that he took all his scholarship money and spent it on a gaming rig, which was worth more than the trailer he lived in. He also looked like the Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.
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I'm pretty sure you're thinking of WNxOddjob.
Archived thread here: https://web.archive.org/web/2012032...hingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3453028
Archived image album here: https://web.archive.org/web/20120107124452/http://imgur.com:80/a/OEeT2#0

Thread is goldmined so you don't need archives but images are dead otherwise.

Here are some highlights.
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oldTireWater said:
Yea. I think I was working my way through that one about the time I got banned for calling Genesplicer a fag. I hadn't even gotten to the part where the kid was born.
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She stopped posting after she announced that she was pregnant and got reamed for it. She posts on mommyboards now.
 
Years ago there was a goon posting about having a pimp next door named ghost pimp. The stories were good (maybe real or maybe not) But when the goon came back with more stories he got ran off because pimping is bad for women.

Then there was dark priest who came over from the planet quake days. He has done the ask a pornographer thing over over a decade he got ran out of ask tell, then when he tried to do it again a year ago in gbs he got ran off because again "porn is bad for women," and shit posters were allowed to shit up the thread.

But the best E/N thread was one I followed via SS was a goon whose wife decided she wanted to have a boyfriend. The goon being the biggest beta bitch wanted to go to counseling, and she told him something to the effect of

"we dont need counseling I am happy in my marriage and dont wish to lose it I just want to be happy in another way and hey here comes my boyfriend, you guys should be friends"

The goons mother gave him the money to file for divorce he moved out, and the last update was her running up to him crying that she wanted the counseling. a wise goon told the fucker that "she went to her boy toy saying she left her husband and now they can be together and he kiciked her to the curb"
 
Remember Tokaii the 72 year old retired Chicago cop? Was like the official forum old guy.

He had a great well-received Ask/tell thread about his time as a cop. Goons loved it.

Few years later he did it again. This time he's an awful bigot and them boys dindu nuffin. Now he's a target.

Eventually got banned for arguing about age of consent laws and branded a pedo defender. Now mentioning him is like talking about Aatrek.

Can't remember the specifics but I gguess it was something like "yeah it may be creepy, but the law is the law and 16 is legal is some places". They were looking for excuses to run him off anyway.

From the genesplicer becomes a mod thread:
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BlueSpark said:
Lowtax white-knighting Bernie Sanders on twitter I guess he's going full socialist now that the money is drying up? (sorry about the blurry text):

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Lowtax complains about the cost of games and micro-transactions:

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More anti-Hillary Clinton stuff:

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Lowtax completes the checklist for being a leftist exceptional individual by retweeting pro-Antifa bullshit:

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Support Something Awful by buying a pixel art sticker of a meme that nobody has thought about for more than six years or a shirt with "RAP" written on it that costs $26.66 USD). He's also selling towels with the 10bux icon on it for about thirty dollars and a truly hideous iPhone case for about twenty dollars (and other shirts I didn't screenshot):

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At least he's making an effort to make some money.

Edit: Sorry to the mod that had to move this post. I was reading a bunch of threads in different tabs and put it in the wrong one.
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TiggerNits said:
Goon marriages are always the best things to read about when you've had an argument with your spouse and need to realize how good you really have it and maybe forgetting to pick up the dry cleaning or not transferring money to the bill pay account on time isn't worth getting upset about
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Also /r/relationships

Pretty much anything where people who spend the vast majority of their time on the Internet try to have a meaningful relationship with someone. But yeah, goon marriages are pretty gross.
 
proteus4994 said:
Also /r/relationships
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I only go to Something Awful these days for the r/relationship thread. I can do without the derails that happen all the time in it, I just want to read about redditors in bad relationships.
 
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