Something Awful and Friends - The roller-coaster train-wreck embarrassing downfall of a Web 1.0 giant and its tick offspring like from Cloverfield

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Ghostse said:
Stockholm sufferers/copium addicts ITT keep talking about the bastions of the right centrists in the car forum, but even if we assume that's true, none of those guys are going to bother doing free labor for Lowtax.
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I can quit copium any time I want thank you

But even the car forum is turning pozzed now. Loling again thinking about that one goon talking about fitting into a car as a "300lb trans woman"
 
AnOminous said:
Just hire some pajeets and pay them a pittance. They couldn't possibly do a worse job than the broke-brained faggots running the site now. I know Dickard was pathologically averse to spending a dime on anything that wasn't drugs or pies, but losing a little bit of money would have been better than losing everything including his life.
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You're assuming that Lowtax would have been capable of making a single correct decision (besides the decision to kill himself, which was ironically his first good decision)

SA was completely dead before Lowtax killed himself - it was no longer a place where content creators wanted to have content hosted. Twitch, Youtube, patreon, facebook, newgrounds, and basically anywhere became a better place to host content and get paid than Something Awful - which meant much less ad revenue for Lowtax to syphon off of for doing nothing. Lowtax basically created nothing but was unable to retain anyone who created content for his site and all he had to do was to give them a little taste of the action and even that pittance was too much for him to even consider.

His literal business plan to attract new users was literally this proposal.

"How much do websites pay for video content"
Youtube - 50% of ad revenue, varying on CPM
Twitch - $5 CPM, 50/50 sub split for Affiliates/Partners, 70/30 split for Bits
Something Awful - $0 and a $10 fee to join the forums in the first place

The only people who made money on SA were the folks selling shitty merch through SA mart (and the one or two guys who owned Coupons and Deals and made it bannable to post affiliate codes other than thiers) - even the Administrators (post Radium) weren't paid anything. He would happily cash huge checks (upwards of $50,000 a month) and felt it was a fair system because he wrote 5 entire front page articles that month and was shocked when people didn't like him and left for greener pastures.
 
Tanner Glass said:
He would happily cash huge checks (upwards of $50,000 a month) and felt it was a fair system because he wrote 5 entire front page articles that month and was shocked when people didn't like him and left for greener pastures.
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But the people who were left were such intolerably miserable fucks they weren't welcome anywhere else so they were a captive audience of paypigs. Even if they hated the place they'd pay to stay there.
 
AnOminous said:
But the people who were left were such intolerably miserable fucks they weren't welcome anywhere else so they were a captive audience of paypigs. Even if they hated the place they'd pay to stay there.
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But then Lowtax would have to set up some kind of revenue stream that capitalized on that and "it's so hard you guys". If Patreon didn't literally do it for him, he never would have done it (even for the thousands a month for free, he was that lazy). He was too lazy to do any kind of merch ("shipping is hard you guys") or even try and hire any content creators (which was relegated to the BPD Mormon he was fucking).
 
Tanner Glass said:
But then Lowtax would have to set up some kind of revenue stream that capitalized on that and "it's so hard you guys". If Patreon didn't literally do it for him, he never would have done it (even for the thousands a month for free, he was that lazy). He was too lazy to do any kind of merch ("shipping is hard you guys") or even try and hire any content creators (which was relegated to the BPD Mormon he was fucking).
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Drunk, stupid, fat, and lazy are no way to go through life. So Lowtax gave up on that too.

Seriously though, what came first the cheapness or the laziness? The cheapness affected his ability to be a lazy piece of shit but he was such a nigger-rich retard that he didn't understand that he could spend $10 today to make $15 tomorrow... and not have to lift a finger.
 
Brain Problems said:
Drunk, stupid, fat, and lazy are no way to go through life. So Lowtax gave up on that too.

Seriously though, what came first the cheapness or the laziness? The cheapness affected his ability to be a lazy piece of shit but he was such a nigger-rich retard that he didn't understand that he could spend $10 today to make $15 tomorrow... and not have to lift a finger.
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That's $15 tomorrow instead of pills or 1/5 of a pie NOW.
 
Brain Problems said:
Not worth posting all THREE PAGES of screencaps but there is a miniature revolt occurring the in the tabletop games/board games thread because the mod for the page (a 60 year old negress with chronic pain who's obsessed with racism, sexism, and covid what are the odds) stepped down because she was such a shitty fucking moderator with trigger finger for questionable probates and No Fun Allowed trolling that wouldn't have even qualified as trolling 10 years ago.

The thread is filled with faggots using no punctuation to DEMAND ANSWERS from admins about why they hate women and niggers. It's really something special to behold.

Here's a taste:

View attachment 3577891
The racism and sexism problem this limp-wristed homo is speaking of? Um. Unsure. People talking about fucking retarded board games that deal with (not even close to glorify) colonialism? One of the most successful kickstarted board games of all time that has vaguely sexualized miniatures and edgy artwork? Take your pick! The thread is so bad it could be featured on the farms, obviously.
View attachment 3577906
View attachment 3577908
It's fun checking in on a thread that is mostly dead except when drama erupts thanks to current year SA users doing what they do best: being retarded.

EDIT: link to the thread because I am also retarded - https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3989138&perpage=40&pagenumber=115
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In general it's fun to watch people melt down on basically every single thread in that subforum. Every single user seems to be a different case of retarded, and watching the retards slapfight is easily - easily the funniest thing I have ever seen.
 
analpiss69 said:
In general it's fun to watch people melt down on basically every single thread in that subforum. Every single user seems to be a different case of retarded, and watching the retards slapfight is easily - easily the funniest thing I have ever seen.
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It's like finding a new species every day lol.
 
AnOminous said:
Just hire some pajeets and pay them a pittance. They couldn't possibly do a worse job than the broke-brained faggots running the site now. I know Dickard was pathologically averse to spending a dime on anything that wasn't drugs or pies, but losing a little bit of money would have been better than losing everything including his life.
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For all her retardedness logan wanted to try to help the "Website" "front page lol"

Lowtax was trapped with an ego of both not wanting to do a job but also not wanting to give up control. Better nothing get done then someone else do it.

The tankies are soo addicted to the hug box that he coulda just turned off the site for 8 hours and then threatened them.

And goons suck at making off sites they are too fractured with decades old shit posts
 
Brain Problems said:
Drunk, stupid, fat, and lazy are no way to go through life. So Lowtax gave up on that too.

Seriously though, what came first the cheapness or the laziness? The cheapness affected his ability to be a lazy piece of shit but he was such a nigger-rich retard that he didn't understand that he could spend $10 today to make $15 tomorrow... and not have to lift a finger.
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Laziness always and forever.

Lowtax is almost a textbook case of learned helplessness. He never had to do much his whole life and just tripped into success. His family was loaded and he got to pursue extremely dumb jobs (working for wacky politicians as a joke, webmaster for a video game website) with none of the usual risk involved and then tripped and fell face first into the most profitable business of all time - profiting off of the work of others. Something Awful had people lining up week over week to just give Lowtax free content for him to run ads on - so many people in fact that he had to start charging for the privilege to do so and that still worked. Free moderators, free photoshoppers, free article writers, free admins and a website that pays for itself hundreds of times over for 20 years. People fought over the right to do these things for him.

No one realized how much money he was making from them - but it was hundreds of thousands and then millions for years upon years - Lowtax never actually had to work hard or hustle for his entire life until finally he ran out of juice - cheating on his wife, website in open rebellion, but no more people working for free (that mattered - the jannies still do it for free). Lowtax could just disappear (and did, frequently) for months or years and people would still throw him piles of cash - even after he literally stole from them (Xenforo upgrade, Forums Search/Archives, Radium's Salary) - but as those days ended he never had a thought to change his ways, he assumed that everything would just work itself out because honestly, why wouldn't it - it worked for him for like 30 years, why stop now?

Lowtax is like one of those animals near a resort area that eat handouts from tourists and then forgets how to hunt for their own food because they've got it so easy and ended the same way - a lazy, entirely avoidable, tragic but expected self-inflicted death. Even his suicide was lazy - his setup wasn't that bad - he was reviled in some internet cultures but he probably could have, with minimal effort, turned it into something that doesn't require a lot of work but he would rather blow his own brains out than consider it.
 
northstar747 said:
So I watched a video about fallout new vegas...wasnt there a goon that worked on that game that put johnny 5 aces in?

I also remember some weird screaming about a tranny joke in pillars of eternity
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Yeah there's an early game reference if you take the Wild Wasteland perk -
1660663728522.png
 
northstar747 said:
So I watched a video about fallout new vegas...wasnt there a goon that worked on that game that put johnny 5 aces in?

I also remember some weird screaming about a tranny joke in pillars of eternity
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I believe that was Josh Sawyer who posted under the username "rope kid". Here's a Reddit post linking to where he talked about Pillars of Eternity 2. He always seemed to be very careful not to offend any of the troons and other weirdo goons so I don't know if he ever ended up as a persona non grata on SA like the Brigador guys.
 
northstar747 said:
So I watched a video about fallout new vegas...wasnt there a goon that worked on that game that put johnny 5 aces in?

I also remember some weird screaming about a tranny joke in pillars of eternity
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There were (and still are to some extent) a lot of Video Game dev goons. Josh Sawyer was probably the most famous (Fallout NV, Pillars of Eternity, and a bunch of those games) and would sneak in SA references in a bunch of those titles. It was, to an extent, a proto NeoGAF. It was one of the draws of SA back when it wasn't 100% dogshit - you never knew who you were talking to. Some goon did a Pokemon Screenshot LP and then the translator saw it and put his character in the game as an NPC as a tribute.

Now it's all computer touching tranny jannies - no fun to be had at all.
 
Tanner Glass said:
Now it's all computer touching tranny jannies - no fun to be had at all.
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It used to be you'd be like "hey you're that guy who put me in a cool game as an NPC" and now it's "hey you're that guy who cut your dick off and then banned me from reddit."
 
northstar747 said:
So I watched a video about fallout new vegas...wasnt there a goon that worked on that game that put johnny 5 aces in?

I also remember some weird screaming about a tranny joke in pillars of eternity
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If I'm not misremembering it was a backer perk in the first PoE to write a humorous little headstone epitaph and the one in question dealt with a dude who nailed a broad only to find only she was a he so he jumps out a window to his death. It was one of the proto-incidents in the lead up to the Great Autism Jihad unless my timelines are completely off.
 
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