Shitty Etsy Products

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Here are some more weird Etsy products that I found.

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Archive Link: https://archive.is/biX0i
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Archive Link: https://archive.is/TUdlX
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Archive Link: https://archive.is/zVoR3
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Archive Link: https://archive.is/WHHQA
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Archive Link: https://archive.is/1jyLl

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I think the baby with the lamp as a head might actually make an interesting Halloween decoration. Oh, and the toe thing the lady is holding in the last picture is a pendant that you put on a necklace, in case anyone was wondering.
 
Crunchy Leaf said:
The description on that thing is wild.
DUE TO CURRENT REGULATION, SHIPS US ONLY; EXCLUDES STATES CA AND NY
PLEASE NOTE: I do not hunt, rather obtain from other shops , or from an animal's remains, that passed of Natural causes. I can only take something if i have been given the permission to take it. i must then be given the permission to work with whatever i took. i never have a say in what comes to be, for it is the spirits who decide.To read all the details about this product, including item specifics, any imperfections, whereabouts of materials & legality, please click on the "more " button. Due to current regulations, ships US only, excludes States CA and NY.
- Pagan Dark Protector REAL Black Phase wolf OOAK doll or Sacred pillow (please see close up of paw phasing.) NOT a true soft mount; no wires to hold in set position; simply reshaped with stuffing and a skull. 100% HAND-stitched; NO machinery.EXPECT asymmetry, as shown in pictures. Fur around horns will be stiff(glued to horns for extra stability.) Made from #1 quality freshly-tanned wolf Skin. - EXACT OOAK Doll pictured.Any imperfections are cosmetic and do not hinder durability in any way. We have discounted for all imperfections that exist.
-Pelt and skull belong to the same wolf's spirit.
-Can be used as sacred pillow or as an OOAK doll for Alter, ceremony , spells, Protection, & Healing
-wolf skull LEGALLY hunted & legally obtained from MH&F; legal ref. # f-114. humane vs inhumane unspecified by MH&F. - has peaceful energy. Has drawings on skull, as an Honor to the wolf's request.
accidental fur got permanent glued to the skull while crafting. Skull also has a couple small teeth missing. has all canines & major teeth.
- wolf pelt LEGALLY & humanely hunted in Northern Canada, where wolves are not threatened or endangered and are yearly hunted to maintain healthy population. legally obtained thru Glacier Wear, a fur trading co. that sells O.A./humane animal products, Only.
-Domestic goat horns from MH&F ; ref. # s-s14; unspecified humane vs ihumane; peaceful energy.
-wolf stuffed with recycled loose humane ranched fox fur (from reject fox fur pieces) and polyester-cotton. fox fur stuffing along with paws kept open (not stitched closed) was at the wolf's request.
-Natural apple-Wood stick was glued to skull, to support skull in an open position.
- "dark protector" as used above, does NOT mean evil, or negative. it refers to the energy, ONLY. Protectors can be light or dark, or more towards neutral. they are ALL STILL Protectors, NOT destroyers. )

ABOUT THE BLUE WOLF: -In general, a "bluephase" wolf is a common gray wolf with a color morph where they are born pure black and then eventually will phase to as white as Snow. There can also be black phase wolves, that either phase very slowly, or stay mostly black throughout their lives, never turning completely white. Blackphase & bluephase wolf fur often has a bluish or purplish tint, that can only be seen at certain angles and only in that of natural solar/lunar lighting. most hairs that phase are typically on the paws and legs. it is rare to get any that phase on any other parts of the wolf. The color morph is rare and even exceeds white and black wolves in rarity, which are also less common than brown and gray colored wolves. Because this morph's rarity is too commonly spotted to be considered an "endangered," color morph to the gray wolf, sadly to this day, blue wolves are NOT protected in areas where wolves can be hunted.
- a whole pelt of a phase-wolf, completely flawless and # 1 TOP grade taxidermy-quality, is worth around 1,500 - 3,000 dollars, BEFORE being made into anything other than a tanned pelt & up to 6,000 at the highest, after being made into something. This particular wolf was graded at #1 quality, but had no lower jaw, and was missing the palm to all 4 paw-pads. therefore, our materials cost were less and we are charging less.
WILD THING'S DEFINITION - In my learnings i have found most bluephase wolves, will teach you about shifts of all kinds. Their fur has Medicine; it is a Teaching & messages, that are unique to the bluephase wolf, just as the Teachings & messages are unique to the white Spirit wolf and black Vision wolf. The bluephase wolf is usually geared towards the Teachings & messages of Metamorphosis& Change. Blackphase wolves veer towards the side of black vision wolves, but with the additional Energy commonly noted in the bluephase wolf.
tl;dr: yes that's a real wolf pelt and uhh it can do weird magic things for you
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Has drawings on skull, as an Honor to the wolf's request.
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I don't think that wolf made any requests to have its skull scribbled on by a weirdo on Etsy.

Oh dear...

https://www.etsy.com/listing/240287421/antique-trapeze-toy-wooden-toys-japan

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It makes me feel slightly better that the Etsy seller didn't actually make that, but on the other hand, who would buy that and display it in their home?
 
TinBean said:
From what I understand there's a large market for these racist antiques. I would guess that most of the people who buy them wear pointy white hats or else have freshly shaven heads or both.
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You'd be surprised. They were a big thing with black collectors, back in the day. Both Michael Jackson and Whoopi Goldberg were rumored to have collections. I don't know if that still goes on.
 
you guys havent seen anything till youve seen the worm from labyrinth on etsy

He looks like something you find in a desert apocalypse scenario
https://www.etsy.com/listing/173791...arch_query=labyrinth worm&ref=sr_gallery-1-11

Steve buscemi crossed with an aborted fetus
https://www.etsy.com/listing/475817...arch_query=labyrinth worm&ref=sr_gallery-1-21

My fat alcoholic grandmother after taking a shitton of lsd
https://www.etsy.com/listing/536906...arch_query=labyrinth worm&ref=sr_gallery-1-25

Grey alien with a frontbrain
https://www.etsy.com/listing/565297...arch_query=labyrinth worm&ref=sr_gallery-1-34

Gods mistake
https://www.etsy.com/listing/520371...arch_query=labyrinth worm&ref=sr_gallery-1-47

TBH anything david bowie related is sure to bring up tons of this shit
 
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