Shitty Etsy Products

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Micotil 300 said:
A completely unrelated search for jewelry turned up this abomination.
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Avoid searching for jewelry on an Etsy account. Was looking for cutsie stuff for my SO this christmas and for some reason the algorithm assumes Jewelry = Nipple, dick, and clit piercings. And of course, every etsy shop owner has to use a morbidly obese woman as a product model.
 
Does etsy-adjacent count?
Screenshot_20211227-142407.png
 
Fialovy said:
Damn, I am mostly amazed at how she managed to crochet a border around it without breaking the cracker
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Good point, now that I think about it.
Ol Dirty Fatso said:
She probably used a tiny sewing needle to blanket stitch through the holes and then crocheted into that.
lol I'm kind of tempted to recreate this
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Well.... it looks like she cheated a little & used a dog-biscuit, but if you can pull off the same thing with a Ritz:
:semperfidelis:
 
Ol Dirty Fatso said:
She probably used a tiny sewing needle to blanket stitch through the holes and then crocheted into that.
lol I'm kind of tempted to recreate this
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Please do so, I NEED to see if this is ACTUALLY something that can be done in reality instead of cheating with a dog treat.
 
Hank Scorpio said:
Please do so, I NEED to see if this is ACTUALLY something that can be done in reality instead of cheating with a dog treat.
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Its not only possible but something I've personally done. You need a very fine steel hook and in my case, some extra crackers because I broke the first three. Go slowly, and its not hard though.
 
This might be shared a 100 times but I'm too tired to read it all now. (It's 3 night)

www.etsy.com

Bronze Sculpture Bondage Nude Girl Erotic Art Female Nude | Etsy

A high quality solid bronze sculpture of a girl on a cross. In perfect condition. Signed, with great detail and beautiful patina. Height: 14 cm / 5.5 inch. All our bronze sculptures are entirely hand-made using traditional techniques (lost-wax casting) and first-class materials only.
www.etsy.com www.etsy.com
 
Ol Dirty Fatso said:
She probably used a tiny sewing needle to blanket stitch through the holes and then crocheted into that.
lol I'm kind of tempted to recreate this
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Tbh it would be an excellent way of regulating your tension when crocheting - if you end up too tight you're going to break the cracker. Also I have tiny crochet hooks for thread that would prolly fit through the cracker holes, but sewing needle + blanket stitch would probably be better anyway.
 
I feel like no matter what I try to browse around for, Etsy eventually shows me "reusable" menstrual pads. Keyword spamming, print imagery or some weird stretches in labeling I can kind of get, but why does Etsy show me this shit when it has no apparent relevance? I was looking for Halloween cookie cutters, not vampire-themed bacteria-nests. No one has enough money to convince me to partake in "reusable" menstrual pads or "reusable" diapers. I'm not cleaning that nastiness with my hands, nor am I putting it into my washing machine without blowing the damn thing up with borrowed military ordinance afterwards.

Are the people in charge over at Etsy trying to push some kind of misguided agenda in a personal crusade against sanitary products?
 
Nonconsentual Pronouns said:
I feel like no matter what I try to browse around for, Etsy eventually shows me "reusable" menstrual pads. Keyword spamming, print imagery or some weird stretches in labeling I can kind of get, but why does Etsy show me this shit when it has no apparent relevance? I was looking for Halloween cookie cutters, not vampire-themed bacteria-nests. No one has enough money to convince me to partake in "reusable" menstrual pads or "reusable" diapers. I'm not cleaning that nastiness with my hands, nor am I putting it into my washing machine without blowing the damn thing up with borrowed military ordinance afterwards.
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How on earth do you handle your underwear after a surprise period? You have to wash it somehow.
 
Ebony Way said:
How on earth do you handle your underwear after a surprise period? You have to wash it somehow.
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Keeping track of one's schedule and not waiting until there's enough blood to get that bad helps. 4-8 hours of blood and tissue on one of those cloth pads is a completely different issue in terms of severity when compared to a normal initial onset, if it even gets the chance to smudge onto your underwear in stead of just onto a piece of TP in the restroom. Letting oneself bleed into their underwear for hours is just free-bleeding at that point. There's also the difference that the thickness of that pad's fabric and it's stuffing would make when soaked with blood when compared to the thin fabric of our underwear. To anyone past their teens who gets their onset with a sudden, massive gush like the elevator scene in The Shining, you should probably discuss with your doctor how you can go about getting that under control, be it hormone therapy, diet changes, exercise, etc, because it's often a red flag for serious underlying issues and increases fatigue and other symptoms regardless.

TL;DR - A smudge is really no big deal to clean, but an entire pad's worth of blood and pulpy flesh is pushing it, to put it lightly.
 
Nonconsentual Pronouns said:
I feel like no matter what I try to browse around for, Etsy eventually shows me "reusable" menstrual pads. Keyword spamming, print imagery or some weird stretches in labeling I can kind of get, but why does Etsy show me this shit when it has no apparent relevance? I was looking for Halloween cookie cutters, not vampire-themed bacteria-nests. No one has enough money to convince me to partake in "reusable" menstrual pads or "reusable" diapers. I'm not cleaning that nastiness with my hands, nor am I putting it into my washing machine without blowing the damn thing up with borrowed military ordinance afterwards.

Are the people in charge over at Etsy trying to push some kind of misguided agenda in a personal crusade against sanitary products?
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I don't see the big deal. Sounds like a better alternative than having tonnes of used menstrual pads and tampons going into landfill or (worse) into the oceans. I switched to menstrual underwear and now I'll never go back to pads. It's not like I didn't suffer the occasional leakages when I was using pads and had to soak and clean the bloodied garments before; at least the brand of underwear I got have the highest non-leak rating - and I haven't had a single issue with them.

I'm not game enough to try those cups those. To hell with that!

Nonconsentual Pronouns said:
Keeping track of one's schedule and not waiting until there's enough blood to get that bad helps. 4-8 hours of blood and tissue on one of those cloth pads is a completely different issue in terms of severity when compared to a normal initial onset, if it even gets the chance to smudge onto your underwear in stead of just onto a piece of TP in the restroom. Letting oneself bleed into their underwear for hours is just free-bleeding at that point. There's also the difference that the thickness of that pad's fabric and it's stuffing would make when soaked with blood when compared to the thin fabric of our underwear. To anyone past their teens who gets their onset with a sudden, massive gush like the elevator scene in The Shining, you should probably discuss with your doctor how you can go about getting that under control, be it hormone therapy, diet changes, exercise, etc, because it's often a red flag for serious underlying issues and increases fatigue and other symptoms regardless.

TL;DR - A smudge is really no big deal to clean, but an entire pad's worth of blood and pulpy flesh is pushing it, to put it lightly.
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Yeeah, that's true unless you have menorrhagia. I don't get a choice how heavy it hits when it hits.

@Neurotypical Mantis lol. There there 🙈
 
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Wanna have some fun?

Go to AntiquegemsStore. Seriously.

ETA: awww-you can't, the store finally got shut down :'(

An example:

1641388571898.png


Glued welo opals onto charcoal (?) = PROFIT!

Note at the time of the screenshot, one person had this in their cart.
 
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