- Joined
- Apr 6, 2015
This should really be a PSA.
Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)
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This should really be a PSA.
- Joined
- Apr 21, 2017
When I was in elementary school we had to do square dancing in gym class. It was the most awkward, cringey shit ever. I swear the gym teacher knew how horrifying it must have been and was a sadist. Although, we did get to play a lot of dodge ball and hockey so it sorta averaged out.
Biek Fowler
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 6, 2020
I forgot to mention in my original post but some kid made a chemical bomb during science class and put in in a tub of hot water. Long story short, it exploded on the teacher and she was on leave for the rest of the year. So that was fun.
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2016
Well this is one for the history books.
I'm going to try to describe this as best I can. This is definitely more of a "you had to be there" story, but it's just too absurd not to share.
This afternoon I was doing some work in the chemistry annex building on campus. I've been spending a lot of time there because there's rarely anyone there and I can get shit done without the mask gestapo yelling at me for occasionally having mine pulled down.
I'm sitting in the large lounge room. I have a table pulled up against the south wall in order to have access to an outlet for my laptop. There's a closet door about a foot to my right.
About an hour into my work, this casually dressed man comes in. He opens the closet and drags out a podium. He sets it up right next to me. I don't think anything of it.
He leaves for about five minutes and returns, setting up a laptop at the podium. I turn and ask him if I'm in the way of something and that I would be more than happy to move. He responds with a friendly "No, you're fine right there! You were here first anyway."
I think, "Okay, if he was doing what I think he was going to do, he certainly would have asked me to move. Maybe he's just testing some equipment or troubleshooting something."
He walks away.
Ten minutes later about 15 people file in. I freeze. I can't fathom what's about to happen. Podium man walks back to the podium. The podium and the man behind it are six inches to my right. He dims the lights and lowers the screen. It finishes its descent a few inches behind my left shoulder.
"Good afternoon everyone, thanks for coming to this meeting of the chemistry graduate student association. Today I want to talk about..."
It's happening. I don't know what to do. This man is giving a lecture, and me, a random stranger is sitting next to him like I'm supposed to be there. Like I'm his assistant or some guest speaker he's about to introduce.
Everything begins racing through my head. Why didn't he politely ask me to leave when he saw me there? Why didn't he inform me of what was about to happen when I volunteered to leave? Why did he encourage me to stay? Is this man mentally ill? Why didn't I get up to leave when the crowd filed in? What is even happening right now?
I have two options. Get up and leave in the middle of his presentation, or slouch over and bury myself in my book. I don't know why, but I chose the latter.
He spoke for an hour. One hour of me sitting directly to his right. When he was finished, he packed up his laptop, moved the podium back into the closet, and left. Didn't say a word to me.
And that, my friends, was my afternoon.
I'm going to try to describe this as best I can. This is definitely more of a "you had to be there" story, but it's just too absurd not to share.
This afternoon I was doing some work in the chemistry annex building on campus. I've been spending a lot of time there because there's rarely anyone there and I can get shit done without the mask gestapo yelling at me for occasionally having mine pulled down.
I'm sitting in the large lounge room. I have a table pulled up against the south wall in order to have access to an outlet for my laptop. There's a closet door about a foot to my right.
About an hour into my work, this casually dressed man comes in. He opens the closet and drags out a podium. He sets it up right next to me. I don't think anything of it.
He leaves for about five minutes and returns, setting up a laptop at the podium. I turn and ask him if I'm in the way of something and that I would be more than happy to move. He responds with a friendly "No, you're fine right there! You were here first anyway."
I think, "Okay, if he was doing what I think he was going to do, he certainly would have asked me to move. Maybe he's just testing some equipment or troubleshooting something."
He walks away.
Ten minutes later about 15 people file in. I freeze. I can't fathom what's about to happen. Podium man walks back to the podium. The podium and the man behind it are six inches to my right. He dims the lights and lowers the screen. It finishes its descent a few inches behind my left shoulder.
"Good afternoon everyone, thanks for coming to this meeting of the chemistry graduate student association. Today I want to talk about..."
It's happening. I don't know what to do. This man is giving a lecture, and me, a random stranger is sitting next to him like I'm supposed to be there. Like I'm his assistant or some guest speaker he's about to introduce.
Everything begins racing through my head. Why didn't he politely ask me to leave when he saw me there? Why didn't he inform me of what was about to happen when I volunteered to leave? Why did he encourage me to stay? Is this man mentally ill? Why didn't I get up to leave when the crowd filed in? What is even happening right now?
I have two options. Get up and leave in the middle of his presentation, or slouch over and bury myself in my book. I don't know why, but I chose the latter.
He spoke for an hour. One hour of me sitting directly to his right. When he was finished, he packed up his laptop, moved the podium back into the closet, and left. Didn't say a word to me.
And that, my friends, was my afternoon.
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2019
@Kari Kamiya
Looks like I only misremembered one detail - there were four girls, not five. Kelli is the second from the left. There is some cheering around the 30-second mark. This video is worth watching twice because the girl on the far right is so uncoordinated haha and the title card at the very end is unrelated, just there for the next section of the video.
- Joined
- Jan 12, 2017
That's surprisingly tame lol, I was getting flashbacks to my middle school days. Definitely was the kind of dance that was popular with the girls at the time, although the ones I saw had less rump shaking and more like Napoleon Dynamite-inspired. The podium there looks like it leads into a classroom, it looks like a church gymnasium stage so I got confused about the setting.
Thanks for sharing!
Speaking of talent shows, I got flashbacks while ripping my old Kelly Clarkson CD (legit forgot how good of an album it is) to eighth grade where a couple of girls sang over "Because of You" and had to self-censor "same damn thing". They were off-sync and didn't have the same energy as Clarkson, of course, but I remember cringing in my seat during it. Which is hypocritical of me 'cause I did the same thing in singing over the "2.B.A. Master" cassette tape to "The Time Has Come" 'cause I thought it was oh-so-symbolic of me to pretty much say farewell to middle school lol. But the funny thing about that was the tape had a snag in the middle of the song 'cause I had listened to it so much over the years, so I just sang as normal, but the rest of the crowd reacted to it by looking at the stereo when it went muffled for a moment.
MysticMisty
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 12, 2013
In 8th grade I had multiple classes with a cunt of a girl I nicknamed Cockroach, but it was quickly shortened to Roach. I came up with it because she had two long, skinny bangs that reminded me of a bug's antennae.
Roach was one of those girls who had two or three friends and openly despised everyone else, thought they were above everyone else. Everyone knows the type. She was also the type of student who refused to do any kind of schoolwork or participate in group activities and assignments, except to actively and openly sabotage whoever she was partnered with. Yeah, one of those people. I sometimes wonder how those classmates (including Roach) went on to function outside of school. Between constantly back talking the teacher and refusing to do any sort of work I don't seem them as doing anything except collect welfare.
Anyways, in the last week of February things got pretty bad with Roach when she decided to start hitting the back of my head with a textbook. Hard enough to see stars and immediately cause a terrible headache, actually. I told the teacher every time this happened because this shit fucking hurt, but he'd refused to do anything every time because "I didn't see it". Teachers were fucking useless at my school.
In history on Friday, March 1st, our teacher decided we'd do a review by playing Jeopardy and divided us in groups of three. Guess which group had Roach in it? My other partner and I did out best because the teacher graded us by active participation (versus just blurting out random answers or refusing to answer at all), but of course Roach just sat back and refused to participate.
Towards the end of the class she told us we were stupid for not trying to actively fail every class. Between that day, getting hit on the back of head by a fucking text book every day that week thus far, and every other day since the school year started I had had enough and called out Roach on her shit behavior and told her that she wasn't even fit for flipping fast food burgers without getting fired for her shit attitude. I didn't attempt to whisper my call out and everything went dead silent. The next thing that happened was the teacher angrily escorting me to the office personally, while yelling about how loud and rude I was as he did so.
The office was surprisingly empty of other students that day (I can only assume that Mr. Fatty must've not been in that day), and after a quick talk with one of the VPs I was sitting in his office. He'll be Mr. Young because he was pretty young for a VP. I'm told to explain myself, and I admit that what the teacher said was mostly true, except that I wasn't nearly as loud as he said I was, and that I did it because I've been having problems with Roach all year (I didn't call her Roach though, obviously). This is the first time he's heard this and actually gives me the opportunity to keep going, so I tell him all about the shit she's been doing all year, and the recent escalation of being hit on the head by textbooks with teachers refusing to do anything about it, including and especially this particular teacher.
Mr. Young is listening to me when we're interrupted by someone at the door. The district didn't see a need to provide nearly enough adult hall monitors at this school (there was only, like, one, maybe two, and one of them was a bitchy morbidly obese Mexican woman with a massive camel toe) so VPs had to double as such, especially during lunch times. For whatever reason they need Mr. Young to patrol so he has to leave. For some reason I am put in the RO's office. I guess because it's unlocked all the time? Either way I'm made to sit in there.
To me this is no big deal. Kind of like a stay of execution. So I take out one of my notebooks and start drawing for a while. I don't know how long I drew before the RO arrived. She is quite nice to me despite knowing I had to be in trouble, which is probably why after a few minutes of her showing up one of the bitchy secretaries orders me out of her office "because she needs it". Even though she personally didn't ask me to, or even came off as remotely annoyed.
So now I'm sitting out in the main part of the office, where bitchy secretaries can glare at me more easily. I don't think they like that I can find ways to amuse myself in the office before getting in trouble, but fuck them, I'm going to have as good of a day as I can. I alternate between drawing and reading, and three entire classes pass without any sign of Mr. Young returning soon.
8th grade lunch finally starts (because this year my school decided to segregate all the grades into different lunches, and because they gave no fucks about us, 8th graders had lunch between 5th and 6th periods near the end of the day), and I awkwardly start to pull out my lunch when my school counselor appears and invites me away from the bitchy secretaries to her office to eat. Bitchy secretaries can't complain since I was explicitly invited and I go to my counselor's office.
As I pull out my lunch in there she asks how come I'm in the office today, as I've hardly been in trouble since escaping Mr. Fatty. I tell her all about Roach, and she's very unhappy to hear this. Turns out a lot of my classmates have come to her to complain about Roach because the teachers won't do anything. This frustrates her because she can't do anything except listen and offer sympathy: only teachers have the power to report students to the VPs.
After that she asks if I have any plans for the weekend. I tell her about how I invited a friend to come over after school and we're going to play video games for the rest of the afternoon before going out to eat. And tomorrow I'm headed out to one of the malls to hang out and go shopping, and then go to the drive-in theater tomorrow night with a friend. At this point my counselor stops me and asks what's going on for me to do so much in one weekend. I tell her it's my birthday today. And it's true, that day was, in fact, my birthday.
Counselor is shocked and genuinely upset that I have spent almost the entire day in the office, on my birthday, because of Roach. She tells me she's going to take care of this and heads out for a bit, so I eat by myself. When she comes back she happily told me she's taken care of things, and we spend the rest of lunch and the first few minutes of 6th period talking. That's when Mr. Young finally returned and I went back with him to his office to be sentenced.
Mr. Young is surprisingly in a better mood. I find out that the counselor told him all the problems students have with Roach that come to her because the teachers won't do anything, and give him the names of at least some of those students. Then when 6th period started he went to Roach's last class of the day (which was also my last class of the day), and talked to the names in that class. Not only did they back up my side of the story about what happened in history, they've actually witnessed her hitting me with textbooks, and a bunch of other shit.
Taking all of this into account he no longer blames me for what I did, nor does he believe I was exceptionally loud like my teacher said. But because I did technically interrupt the class (though mainly to appease my teacher) he's giving me a couple days of detention I can serve next week, and asks me to call out Roach quieter in the future. Oh, and he wished me a happy birthday, too.
Then he walked me to my 6th period class so he could haul Roach down to the office. And let me tell you, he looked a lot angrier at her than he ever did with me. Not that Roach seemed to care, she just walked out with that better-than-you smirk she always had.
Flash forward to the end of the weekend. I never told mom about my detention because I didn't want it to spoil my big birthday weekend, but on Sunday night she casually brings up she got a phone call from the school Friday afternoon. I'm rather obviously scared, but she laughs and tells me it's okay. Mr. Young explained that I was standing up to a known bully and that the detention was really to appease the teacher this happened in front of. He also assured her that even though he couldn't say exactly what, that Roach was going to be much, much more severely punished. Mom tells me she's happy I stood up to such a bitch and only asks that I call people out privately, where adults can't hear me, in the future. She was so genuinely happy about me standing up for myself that after detention that Monday she took me out to dinner to celebrate.
And that's how I called out a bitch and was rewarded for doing so. Oh, and for the curious, I found out that Roach was given nearly two weeks of ISS, basically the max you can give without full on suspending someone. Definitely a lot worse than a few detentions, but nothing about Roach changed. Go figure.
Epilogue: At school on Monday at the start of history my teacher makes a big show of ordering me to the back room into this shared mini-conference room, and orders me to spend the class writing an apology letter to Mrs. Whoever, who shares the mini-conference room with us and whose class I interrupted last Friday with my supposedly loud and disruptive outburst. Whatever. I sit down, write it out, and spend the rest of class drawing until he comes back near the end. At this point he disappears through one of the other doors and brings in Mrs. Whoever, who looks very confused. I apologize for being loud on Friday, and hand her my apology letter. She straight up tells me she has no idea what I'm talking about, because she never heard any sort of noise out of our class Friday. She looks annoyed to have been hauled out of class. Mrs. Whoever disappears back into her class, and my teacher turns and glares at me, because it's my fault I exposed his lie, I guess.
Roach was one of those girls who had two or three friends and openly despised everyone else, thought they were above everyone else. Everyone knows the type. She was also the type of student who refused to do any kind of schoolwork or participate in group activities and assignments, except to actively and openly sabotage whoever she was partnered with. Yeah, one of those people. I sometimes wonder how those classmates (including Roach) went on to function outside of school. Between constantly back talking the teacher and refusing to do any sort of work I don't seem them as doing anything except collect welfare.
Anyways, in the last week of February things got pretty bad with Roach when she decided to start hitting the back of my head with a textbook. Hard enough to see stars and immediately cause a terrible headache, actually. I told the teacher every time this happened because this shit fucking hurt, but he'd refused to do anything every time because "I didn't see it". Teachers were fucking useless at my school.
In history on Friday, March 1st, our teacher decided we'd do a review by playing Jeopardy and divided us in groups of three. Guess which group had Roach in it? My other partner and I did out best because the teacher graded us by active participation (versus just blurting out random answers or refusing to answer at all), but of course Roach just sat back and refused to participate.
Towards the end of the class she told us we were stupid for not trying to actively fail every class. Between that day, getting hit on the back of head by a fucking text book every day that week thus far, and every other day since the school year started I had had enough and called out Roach on her shit behavior and told her that she wasn't even fit for flipping fast food burgers without getting fired for her shit attitude. I didn't attempt to whisper my call out and everything went dead silent. The next thing that happened was the teacher angrily escorting me to the office personally, while yelling about how loud and rude I was as he did so.
The office was surprisingly empty of other students that day (I can only assume that Mr. Fatty must've not been in that day), and after a quick talk with one of the VPs I was sitting in his office. He'll be Mr. Young because he was pretty young for a VP. I'm told to explain myself, and I admit that what the teacher said was mostly true, except that I wasn't nearly as loud as he said I was, and that I did it because I've been having problems with Roach all year (I didn't call her Roach though, obviously). This is the first time he's heard this and actually gives me the opportunity to keep going, so I tell him all about the shit she's been doing all year, and the recent escalation of being hit on the head by textbooks with teachers refusing to do anything about it, including and especially this particular teacher.
Mr. Young is listening to me when we're interrupted by someone at the door. The district didn't see a need to provide nearly enough adult hall monitors at this school (there was only, like, one, maybe two, and one of them was a bitchy morbidly obese Mexican woman with a massive camel toe) so VPs had to double as such, especially during lunch times. For whatever reason they need Mr. Young to patrol so he has to leave. For some reason I am put in the RO's office. I guess because it's unlocked all the time? Either way I'm made to sit in there.
To me this is no big deal. Kind of like a stay of execution. So I take out one of my notebooks and start drawing for a while. I don't know how long I drew before the RO arrived. She is quite nice to me despite knowing I had to be in trouble, which is probably why after a few minutes of her showing up one of the bitchy secretaries orders me out of her office "because she needs it". Even though she personally didn't ask me to, or even came off as remotely annoyed.
So now I'm sitting out in the main part of the office, where bitchy secretaries can glare at me more easily. I don't think they like that I can find ways to amuse myself in the office before getting in trouble, but fuck them, I'm going to have as good of a day as I can. I alternate between drawing and reading, and three entire classes pass without any sign of Mr. Young returning soon.
8th grade lunch finally starts (because this year my school decided to segregate all the grades into different lunches, and because they gave no fucks about us, 8th graders had lunch between 5th and 6th periods near the end of the day), and I awkwardly start to pull out my lunch when my school counselor appears and invites me away from the bitchy secretaries to her office to eat. Bitchy secretaries can't complain since I was explicitly invited and I go to my counselor's office.
As I pull out my lunch in there she asks how come I'm in the office today, as I've hardly been in trouble since escaping Mr. Fatty. I tell her all about Roach, and she's very unhappy to hear this. Turns out a lot of my classmates have come to her to complain about Roach because the teachers won't do anything. This frustrates her because she can't do anything except listen and offer sympathy: only teachers have the power to report students to the VPs.
After that she asks if I have any plans for the weekend. I tell her about how I invited a friend to come over after school and we're going to play video games for the rest of the afternoon before going out to eat. And tomorrow I'm headed out to one of the malls to hang out and go shopping, and then go to the drive-in theater tomorrow night with a friend. At this point my counselor stops me and asks what's going on for me to do so much in one weekend. I tell her it's my birthday today. And it's true, that day was, in fact, my birthday.
Counselor is shocked and genuinely upset that I have spent almost the entire day in the office, on my birthday, because of Roach. She tells me she's going to take care of this and heads out for a bit, so I eat by myself. When she comes back she happily told me she's taken care of things, and we spend the rest of lunch and the first few minutes of 6th period talking. That's when Mr. Young finally returned and I went back with him to his office to be sentenced.
Mr. Young is surprisingly in a better mood. I find out that the counselor told him all the problems students have with Roach that come to her because the teachers won't do anything, and give him the names of at least some of those students. Then when 6th period started he went to Roach's last class of the day (which was also my last class of the day), and talked to the names in that class. Not only did they back up my side of the story about what happened in history, they've actually witnessed her hitting me with textbooks, and a bunch of other shit.
Taking all of this into account he no longer blames me for what I did, nor does he believe I was exceptionally loud like my teacher said. But because I did technically interrupt the class (though mainly to appease my teacher) he's giving me a couple days of detention I can serve next week, and asks me to call out Roach quieter in the future. Oh, and he wished me a happy birthday, too.
Then he walked me to my 6th period class so he could haul Roach down to the office. And let me tell you, he looked a lot angrier at her than he ever did with me. Not that Roach seemed to care, she just walked out with that better-than-you smirk she always had.
Flash forward to the end of the weekend. I never told mom about my detention because I didn't want it to spoil my big birthday weekend, but on Sunday night she casually brings up she got a phone call from the school Friday afternoon. I'm rather obviously scared, but she laughs and tells me it's okay. Mr. Young explained that I was standing up to a known bully and that the detention was really to appease the teacher this happened in front of. He also assured her that even though he couldn't say exactly what, that Roach was going to be much, much more severely punished. Mom tells me she's happy I stood up to such a bitch and only asks that I call people out privately, where adults can't hear me, in the future. She was so genuinely happy about me standing up for myself that after detention that Monday she took me out to dinner to celebrate.
And that's how I called out a bitch and was rewarded for doing so. Oh, and for the curious, I found out that Roach was given nearly two weeks of ISS, basically the max you can give without full on suspending someone. Definitely a lot worse than a few detentions, but nothing about Roach changed. Go figure.
Epilogue: At school on Monday at the start of history my teacher makes a big show of ordering me to the back room into this shared mini-conference room, and orders me to spend the class writing an apology letter to Mrs. Whoever, who shares the mini-conference room with us and whose class I interrupted last Friday with my supposedly loud and disruptive outburst. Whatever. I sit down, write it out, and spend the rest of class drawing until he comes back near the end. At this point he disappears through one of the other doors and brings in Mrs. Whoever, who looks very confused. I apologize for being loud on Friday, and hand her my apology letter. She straight up tells me she has no idea what I'm talking about, because she never heard any sort of noise out of our class Friday. She looks annoyed to have been hauled out of class. Mrs. Whoever disappears back into her class, and my teacher turns and glares at me, because it's my fault I exposed his lie, I guess.
- Joined
- Apr 6, 2018
there was this hick kid with asperger's who, in a rage beyond human comprehension, picked up a chair and hurled it at our assistant principal before running out as fast as he can through the front doors.
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2018
That's normal, tbh.
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2020
When I was in high school attention-seeking whores would say that they were bisexual. Me and my friends would call each other fag or faggot, and this one chick turned around and nagged, "excuse me, but I'm BISEXUAL!" So shot back at her saying, "big FUCKING deal, mind your business."
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2019
Did everyone clap?
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2020
No, she just stormed off in a huff, and my friends just laughed.
Santiagothrumachifacku
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 6, 2020
There was this one weird amateur Youtuber friend that I had in middle school that was really into anthro-porn. I think I still have the original emails he sent me full of FNAF porn that he had saved in his collection. He makes books on stories that he makes up, n' he writes them very professionally and almost always includes himself fighting along with his anthro characters. Did I mention he makes art too? He made me and my friend personal Christmas cards with a handwritten note and a miniature drawing of his made up anthro sister (He is literally adopted so this is impossible) hugging the fursonas he created for us. I was a a wolf...
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2020
One time a class older than us gave our lunch table a pizza box full of rice and other food as a prank. We grabbed for what was supposed to be a pizza slice and ended up making a massive mess at our table. Only one or two people from our group cleaned that table. A year later we did the same thing to them with a "box of mcnuggets". They weren't as messy as us but we still got our revenge.
MysticMisty
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 12, 2013
That is way more amusing then what went down at my talentless show. I like how obviously they cut out the end, which is amazing considering they left in all those underage jiggling boobs. Amazing.
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2019
In high school I was friends with a few people who were part of a larger friend group who loved playing D&D. They got together every weekend and were always excited for new people to join the group. I only ended up staying friend with one of the guys and he went to a different school so we would sometimes go months without seeing each other. When I finally saw him I asked how D&D was going and he said he left the group. What transpired was the nerdiest argument I've ever heard, basically where he failed to answer a riddle and a dragon ate him and the other guys in the group got mad at him. The argument was so heated he stopped talking to them, whereas the rest of the people in the group still play together (I now have a mutual friend who knows the guys and said they still get together a few weekends a month and this has been going on for almost 20 years.)
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2018
Had a talent show junior year where three different girls sang Carrie Underwood's "Jesus Take the Wheel". By the time the third one got on stage and announced she was going to sing she timidly added that she'd prepared to sing "Jesus Take the Wheel" and there was a very audible groan from the entire student body as a response. To this day that song only reminds me of teen girls who think they're the next American Idol.
- Joined
- Jan 12, 2017
That is super awkward lol. Did the teacher in charge of the talent show auditions just not pay attention (since typically the song that gets sung in audition is what they're going to sing on stage), or was there no audition whatsoever, it was just open-mic? I remember when I auditioned in freshman year that we had to do a quick 15-to-30-seconds of what we're auditioning for in front of everyone who was trying out, wouldn't those girls have caught on to pick a different song or didn't expect the other(s) to pass?
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2018
I don't actually think this was organized well but I don't know, I was just an audience member.