Recipes from around the farm - I found the recipe so you don’t have too

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A Widdle Woach said:
As a Pern nerd I have to say if you’re going into them looking for dragon rider adventures like Eragon you’re going to be disappointed.
You have to keep in mind they were written in the late 60’s and especially the earlier novels are more politics focused.
Pern’s world building though is amazing, the sci-fi behind the biologically engineered ’dragons’ is really interesting and the culture of the Weyrs is a lot of fun.

The pacing may be a little slow for today’s readers but Pern for me was one of the first worlds I got lost in. There’s big things like why the Weyrs are built and run they way they are to even little things like a coffee substitute called Klah being the morning drink of choice because coffee can’t grow on Pern.

Here’s a recipe for Klah from the guidebook:

Mix Together:
2 tablespoons sweet ground chocolate
1/2 cup dark cocoa
3/8 teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon dark instant coffee ground into a fine powder
A small pinch of nutmeg

Use two to four teaspoons of the mix per cup of boiling water. Mix well. It should be thick like hot cocoa.
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Just A Fat Round Bird said:
Sauerkraut is really easy to make, healthy and a great addition to many dishes.

All you need to do is cut up some cabbage (or any other similar vegetable, in German it would be any type of Kohl, but it doesn't translate well), put salt on in, punch the fuck out of it until its softened up and letting out its juices. Now put it into a fermentation crock (or an old, cleaned pickle jar works fine) and always keep everything under liquid.
Wait 2 weeks or so and you are done.
A good salt to cabbage ratio is 15g per kg cabbage.
You can add other spices if you want.
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Kraut is a little more complex then that but you've got the right idea. To much salt will kill of the bacteria and it won't ferment properly. Being able to burp it in a nice thick ceramic jar wil make a world of difference and thinly sliced cabbage makes the flavour better.

I'll post my recipe when i'm not drunk and lazy.
 
Premium Gonzo said:
Kraut is a little more complex then that but you've got the right idea. To much salt will kill of the bacteria and it won't ferment properly. Being able to burp it in a nice thick ceramic jar wil make a world of difference and thinly sliced cabbage makes the flavour better.

I'll post my recipe when i'm not drunk and lazy.
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Nigger, Im using recipes from the DDR and just abbreviated the general process for the farms.
 
Grilled cheese with bacon and horseradish spread. Simple and artery hardening.

Jewish rye
Bacon
Whatever kind of cheese you like. I like havarti, gruyere, or a medium cheddar
Horseradish sauce

Cook bacon just enough to be edible. Leave grease in the pan.
Place 2 bacon slices in each sandwich.
Cook in bacon grease.
Spread horseradish sauce on top.
They're good cold too.
 
I started fermenting red onions, about 5 lbs in 4 quart jars which is the max number of lids I have. Apparently you need 5% salinity so I mixed a quart of water with 3 tbsp salt separately and poured that in. Did that two times and had a little left over. With this many I will probably start eating one before two weeks have passed, and let the others ferment longer.
 
The Mass Shooter Ron Soye said:
I started fermenting red onions, about 5 lbs in 4 quart jars which is the max number of lids I have. Apparently you need 5% salinity so I mixed a quart of water with 3 tbsp salt separately and poured that in. Did that two times and had a little left over. With this many I will probably start eating one before two weeks have passed, and let the others ferment longer.
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Have you tasted it yet?
 
i have one,

Recipe: Egg
Requirements: Egg (one or more), bowl (preferably metal), water (regular unleaded), and concentrated heat.

Step 1 combine elements of water and bowl
Step 2 apply concentrated heat to the waterbowl
Step 3 Read kiwifarms until bubbling
Step 4 submerge egg
Step 5 Read kiwifarms for 13 minutes
Step 6 retrieve egg
Step 7 remove eggskins
Step 8 Emjoy!
 
AnOminous said:
A technique I like is from one of Gordon Ramsay's series of basics videos, and involves melting some of the fat while holding it on the fat strip side, then frying it in its own fat, using salt, pepper, and crushed garlic, but not with the skin off. Just crushed and rubbed against the meat.

That said, I'm also a huge fan of caramelized onions, and maybe a dash of Worcestershire in them.

It is not going to ruin a steak to absolutely slather it in butter, though, at the very end, while it rests, although depending on your tolerance, dabbing it dry before plating it is fine too.

Here's the 2 1/2 minute video:

He also uses thyme, which you can probably do without but is fine. I like these very short Ramsay videos where he just explains a method simply and without bullshit. When he's not deliberately acting like an asshole to impress Americans, he's pretty good.
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Chongqing said:
Nice.

Please let us know how it goes.
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I opened a jar after 9 days. Tastes good, not overpowering for raw onion, kind of like salsa without any tomatoes. I also used some of the onions and onion brine to make beans.

I would recommend doing this to anybody who has bought a lot of onions and ended up with some of them spoiling. These are longer lasting.
 
The Mass Shooter Ron Soye said:
Cold shocking the egg should make it easier to peel too.
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Love hard boiled eggs, but the peeling drives most people mad. Take a pushpin and poke a hole in the shell before you boil them. I don't know if it matters but I always do it in the center of the thick end. Every time I've done eggs since I started doing this, the shells slide right off.
 
The Mass Shooter Ron Soye said:
I opened a jar after 9 days. Tastes good, not overpowering for raw onion, kind of like salsa without any tomatoes. I also used some of the onions and onion brine to make beans.

I would recommend doing this to anybody who has bought a lot of onions and ended up with some of them spoiling. These are longer lasting.
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Thank you!
 
I'm Retarded? said:
the fun part about making a loaded baked potato is that you can put whatever you want on it, even if you just want to be basic with sour cream and cheese. sour cream and cheese is good.

I like a little butter, a lot of sour cream, cheese, bacon bits, green onions, salt and pepper. but my fam also has a baked potato recipe we've passed down several generations that became a tradition because they were fucking poor and it's a lot of food for cheap.

first, bake potatoes as normal. when they're getting close to done, throw some ground meat of your choice (turkey, beef, pork) in a stock pot and brown it. when the potatoes are done, cut them in half and scoop the guts out into the stock pot. add broth, also of your choice (chicken or beef) until it's a nice, creamy consistency, like thick mashed potatoes. then add a fuck load of cheese and stir it in until it's melted completely. supplement with salt, pepper, and any other seasonings of your choice (garlic powder, onion powder, etc), mix that shit up, and spoon it back into the potato skins. add a layer of cheese on top, then pop it back in the oven until the cheese is melted. serve. eat. become fat.

if you really want to juice up your potato, use my secret technique: before you put the potatoes in the oven, rub the skin with olive oil and season with salt and pepper, then cook directly on the rack. this keeps the skin soft and tasty instead of dry and bland. when combined with the above recipe, you will know true potato bliss.

P.S.: a potato has all the nutrients you need to live in the skin. the meat is just starch. if you're going to get fat on loaded potatoes, make sure you eat the skin too, and then you literally won't have to eat any other foods. spud life.
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The Mass Shooter Ron Soye said:
I would recommend doing this to anybody who has bought a lot of onions and ended up with some of them spoiling. These are longer lasting.
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Actually no, I left them out too long (about 3 weeks) and they spoiled. So I ended up eating 1 jar and throwing away 3.

It's probably more temperamental than other stuff because of the low acidity. I also let the temperature get pretty high.

Might try fizzy tomatoes next.
 
Eggs Râpe
  • 2 eggs
  • 1/4 pound of 90% ground chuck
  • white onion
  • raw mushrooms
  • frozen spinach
  • fresh basil
Heat olive oil in a pan. Dice onions and mushrooms. Throw onions (not the mushrooms) into the pan. Turn the heat down to medium, sprinkle salt onto onions and let them sit for about ten minutes. (Optional: turn heat to medium-low and let the onions sit for an hour. Make sure they don't scorch or burn on the pan, stir it sometimes.)

Throw mushrooms into the pan, sprinkle a little more salt. If you see brown crust-like stuff (not black; if it's burnt you fucked up) on the pan because the onions have been there for a while, scrape that with the mushroom juice and mix it. Once the mushrooms have shrank (probably just five minutes) push them and the onions to one side of the pan.

Now put the heat onto medium high. Move the pan so half of it is more on top of the heating element than the other side. The onions and mushrooms are not on this hotter side. If there's a ton of liquid from the mushrooms and onions (there shouldn't be) you can carefully drizzle that into a bowl to use in these instructions.

Put a little more olive oil on that hotter side, wait for it to heat up. Sprinkle salt and ground pepper (I like a mix of black and white pepper) onto your ground beef, place it the seasoned side into the olive oil. You want the beef to caramelize as though you were frying a hamburger.

Use a wooden spoon to keep the onions and mushrooms on one side of the pan while allowing the liquid to pour into the oil and beef (this will make getting that crust on the beef easier.) Or pour your bowl of liquid in. If your liquid's all gone you may have been cooking this stuff for too long. You can just throw a tiny amount of water in if this is the case. If you like Worchestershire sauce then mix a small amount of that into your liquid.

Use this same spoon to break up the beef. Once you get that crust (it probably only takes 5 minutes) you want to break all of the beef up just until it's in tiny pieces and it isn't visibly pink anymore. Chop fresh basil into little ribbons, mix the basil with two eggs in a bowl. Mix the mushrooms, onions and beef together. Pour eggs and basil on top.

The eggs will cook in less than a minute, but once it's not visibly slimy anymore you're done. Realize this recipe doesn't have you grate anything and I just find the word "Râpe" funny.
 
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