random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[The Grimace]

"I opened up the door and just as I suspected: It's some big fat hermaphrodite with a 'flock of seagulls' haircut and only one nostril."

 

[TaterBot]

"this forum isn't funny anymore since people started using capital letters and periods." - Keg from SA

 

[Spudnik]

From the recent Onion-san drama (paraphrased):

"Yep, you chained by the neck for 3 full days downstairs....you're allowed to watch anime"

 

[Staffy]

"At press time, a heartbroken Obama had thrown a rock in the drone’s direction, causing the unmanned aerial vehicle to flee into the sky, where it paused to look back one last time at its old master before flying off toward a Yemeni tribal wedding."

Source: http://www.theonion.com/article/departing-obama-tearfully-shoos-away-loyal-drone-f-55100

 

[fcgh vgcf]

racism is over

 

[Rat Speaker]

Gym Leader Elesa Anal is a weird experience tbh

from @entropyseekswork 's profile page

 

[Peace and Harmony]

 

[ToroidalBoat]

I was born to be an office man and possibly a computer man.

 

[Positron]

I bring punk rock aesthetics and methods to academia -- Kevin Allred.

 

[The Grimace]

Nobody did it yet so here ya go

 

[Solzhenitsyn]

To clarify, in case some people are misreading this post. I do not identify myself as a helicopter. --CWC 2017

 

[Zach_Kun]

"Kids love to have sex too and panty shots are OK."
(from the EvaXephon/Yanderedev thread)

 

[DuskEngine]

he never learn how to forgive others, and forgiveness is a serious thing

 

[Hellfire]

"they dishonoured tropical fruit"

 

[Randall Fragg]

Tiny hands of maljustice

 

[Feline Darkmage]

Welcome to the ching Chong forums where Asain posters can discuss starcraft, Honda hatchbacks, and crippling abusive parenting. Finally, a space where you can discuss buffet management of strip mall cafes and your hatred of blacks.

 

[CatParty]

My penis somehow doesn't work despite the fact that I slept with several women last year

 

[The Great Citracett]

"They use the term s*erg"

 

[WeeGee]

Fucking gold, I lost it when reading this.

"Are they gonna be teaching their kids that this kind of shit is okay and they start selling KiwiFarms paper plates and napkins down at the stores soon?"
"Mommy. I want a KiwiFarms Cyberterrorist party!"

 

[Adolf_Ash]

I read up on the 8chan thread about the farms while it was down. For some reason they had a filter for "Kiwi Farms" making it come out "Foxdick". Which I guess is what lead to this comment I read:
"You can take the man out of the Foxdick, but you can't take the Foxdick out of the man"
And yknow... I thought it was pretty funny...