random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[OvercookedBacon]

Wearing a pink jacket while having a mullet =/= Tranny.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

If a nigger had to choose between a loaf of bread for his family or a pair of Nike's he'd try to steal both but would probably choose the Nike's if he understood the conondrum.

 

[Shitted Scaredless]

Grendel your vagina is falling.

 

[Aunt Carol]

It just struck me that there are Kiwis reading this who weren't even born when Polissa's yeast infection started.

 

[Gentlebastard]

If censorship is happening then why didn't the media tell me it is. Checkmate chuds.

Local fox insists scurrilous rumors it's trying to get in henhouse are baseless slander.

I know there are lots of valid theories to answer the eternal question of: What The Hell Is Wrong With This Guy? But, this is why my vote is always for Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

Are we sure this an accurate description of Pat? It does not mention being offensively fat anywhere on this list.

I'm genuinely struggling to formulate any sort of response to the incredible feats of mental gymnastics on display here.

He’s a total narcissist. He’s just not good at it.

He had the fucking term soyim right there! It was right fucking there.

They don't really go to the expense of an autopsy when the cause of death is obvious. They probably even have it on the form at this point in current year America. CAUSE OF DEATH: FAT FUCK.

Getting punched by him doesn't actually hurt it's like being hit by a foam fist soaked in month old fryer grease.

 

[Gog & Magog]

Why is Microsoft like this?
I don't even think shitty Apple is this cucked and their CEO is a butt pirate.

 

[Brain Power]

View attachment 6497050

some notes, since i get a handful of the same comments nearly every day:
1. yes, you can hear some mouth sounds during the beginning of this video. it won't be an issue in the future and it goes away ten minutes in.
2. zelda being taller than link is a win for gay people because tall femmes make the world go round (i am a zelink lesbian propagandist)
3. it seems that you can find pristine weapons even if you didn't break the unfused variety, we only know this because of datamining. i maintain that the game never explaining how this system works is still poor design
4. yes, i have heard of elden ring. i don't plan on playing it in the immediate future but it's on my list
5. I am cautiously optimistic for echoes of wisdom but anxious about it having similar design pitfalls as totk. we can't really know for sure until the game comes out. i will likely talk about it once I've had time to properly form an opinion on it
6. my pronouns are they/them
thank you all so much for watching! i can't believe the extent to which this video blew up (going from 100 subs to nearly 20k in less than two months is something i wasn't prepared for) and i'm so thankful for the (mostly) positive response! be on the lookout for more in the future, there's plenty on the way

 

[Syzyg]

Would I allow a tranny on my team? Most definitely I would if she is very serious and knows how to stay focused on the ball and not the balls.

I once was at a tranny's apartment I was there with some friends and she had about 10 Young high School / college age boys that took turns going into her bedroom.. she came out one time nothing on at all dick hanging out she got a big dick. Those boys ran a train on her.

 

[Tablet County]

28000 dollars a year and stab wounds, wow, great.

Either you're taking the piss or you were thrown at a wall as a baby

How many fake dicks does this bitch have lol?

Inshallah. I will live my life as the holy prophet Chantal has shown me.

 

[World-ClassWrangler]

 

[Shartavius]

dude you must not realize but autocorrect fucked with your username, it says Irish turtle instead of Iranian Turd.

 

[Tablet County]

>eats mouthful of disgusting bugs
>pukes
>his first reaction is to apologise in case people would find that ""culturally insensitive""

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

For some reason the juxtaposition of the icky anal discussion and pro forma disclaimer was hilarious. Thank God they haven’t been bought off by Big Rectum.

I’d rather a KF bro fucks a pooner than a normie who might get sucked into their delusions and end up 5 years later in a polycule financially supporting a seahorse and a hon.

In language, all nouns can be turned into verbs.

It sounds stupid to have an online community of people who spend hours a day chatting about bears eating salmon on a Youtube livecam. They also have a massive websites with bear profiles and fan-taken photos. But we're here on Kiwifarms sperging about niggers and faggots in Articles & News for godsake. We'd probably be healthier if we got obsessed with bears instead.

Haggis is both better tasting and healthier than the contaminated matter americans call food. You use 'heritage' to mean 'edible.' Golf I will grant you, but your grandad is willing to pay an awful lot to play it here. Why complain?

READ THE BIBLE, y'all need Jesus.

Also literary canon is rigid, not ridged for your pleasure.

"I'm gonna perform srs on the US"

If I'm going to die horribly, why not make money on the side? Right.

Do your research. Don't be covered in snails.

Beer, weed and condoms my fren.

At least when you die of heatstroke, your hair won't frizz.

When it comes to Cascade volcanoes, nothing ever happens. It's like god gave them some geological melatonin.

In this moment, JK Rowling is euphoric.

 

[PunkinMan]

My project is not about me versus the trannies.

And if you really want to know the truth trannies are never ever happy.

Their boyfriend never has enough dick.

Their boobs are never just quite right.

They really need $6,000 to get their knuckles ground down.

They need $8,000 to get their Adams Apple shaved off.

They really need some silicone implants in their butt.

They really need to dilate their vagina 16 times per day.

And when it's all said and done they'll get all that crap reversed and go back to being a garden variety fagot.

Trades are open

unironically the hardest shit I have ever laid eyes on this month.

 

[BirdUp]

I kind of liked the design of this one till I read the text about the little girl's mouth being a poop hole.

Luckily for us, the author, a trans man, has eaten pussy before. We are in good hands.

 

[Aunt Carol]

This message was typed on the toilet, where I shit and will proceed to clean my ass and go about my night.

 

[BirdUp]

Fuck off! Stop ruining my fucking forum!

 

[The Ugly One]

Marx was an expert in nothing and developed the perfect ideology for the furious midwit.

 

[Gog & Magog]

[*]Despite the company’s mission “to connect a billion users with optimism and civility”, we found games such as “Beat Up Homeless Outside 7/11 Simulator”, which had 1 million visits and 15,000 favorites before being removed from Roblox.

[*]Nonetheless, Roblox users identifying as 9 years old and up can still beat up homeless people in “Beat Up People Outside of 7/11” with over 900,000 visits.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Be enough of a protector and provider that your woman feels free to go turbo racist. Mine makes even me blush sometimes with the “woah, calm down there hitler, leave some Jews for the rest of us”.

the man's dedication to having no credibility in any given area is remarkable

Most people in marriages built on mutual respect and genuine admiration for the other person will eventually adopt at least some of the others beliefs. It’s just what happens when you can talk rationally about something and care enough about them to know when not to cross any boundaries and when to push a little. I would know because my wife now hates abos.

Wrongthink detected, deploying downvotes