random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CEO of Gay]

But Mr. Janny, other users were being way bigger faggots than me!

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

MG BATHTUB AND BED ADE SEPERATE ENTITIES

 

[NerdShamer]

i have been constantly accused of this so i need to set the record straight
i have never once abused my house in any way shape or form
the house abuse accusations need to STOP. yes there may have been hair dye and broken glass in my tub. that does not constitute abuse and i am sick and tired of people trying to accuse me of abusing my house
this needs to stop
so back the fuck off dipshits

 

[DickMain]

My slay count is approaching 3 digits

 

[JustSomeDong]

I didn't know mass formation psychosis could be used to induce autism on people.

 

[Prune Tracy]

Kiwi Farmer is the nigger of the internet

 

[Betonhaus]

With all due respect, you are fat.

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

Is he still a bi-faggot or did be realize sucking dick for cock is, infact, gay.

 

[TaimuRadiu]

Not just was it written on meth, it needs to be read on meth as well.

 

[Paranoia Machine]

Is it the white man's fault? Yes. We have a blind spot for subversive warfare because we like to fight physically, and our compassion becomes pathological when applied to the new global system. These are weaknesses we must fix.

Just WigNat powerscaling.
Ain't nothin' but a peanut.

 

[Spectate]

Fine. I'm a pedophile.

(L)

 

[CaddestSlown]

Honestly, are you even healthy if you don’t get on a tren cycle while blasting Chinese tiger serum straight into your nutsack every night?

 

[Oliver Onions]

I feel like I was at a hen party and then accidentally wandered into an adjacent gay sex dungeon

 

[Random Internet Person]

It sounds like if you just assume any type of joy or fun whatsoever is anti Islam, you'll be correct 100% of the time.

 

[JustSomeDong]

My recent blood tests show my testosterone in healthy ranges. If you want to kill people, what are you waiting for? Are you waiting for my permission? Are you a woman that needs a man's permission to go do something?

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

I think the ultimate litmus test for liberals and race grifters is prolonged time with me. I truly believe that I just get on people's nerves out of nowhere.

Beautiful tropical scenery can go fuck itself in the coconut hole because he was BOOOOORED

in order words- unga, and might i even add, bunga

please, next time phrase a sentence in such a way where i don't momentarily visualize a man actually casually sucking his own cock in the living room in the presence of his roommates

The opening scene where the girls are singing in beautiful harmony and their undomesticated tits are flying about and the men are doing their simian war dance shows how Zulus were meant to be.

We'll be at home, comfy and undroned.

Do please fuck the hell off

Everyone is tired of your made up fantasy land bullshit there are people dying " imagination " get the fuck out of here spongebob

And there you are, blinking dumbly at the mess, holding your traitorous organ

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

"Wake up private, I'd like to play a game. Look down and you will find your member in the iron grip of Jackie Singh. When the timer starts she will begin straight jorking it. You will have 3 minutes to climax. Fail to bust and her calloused gorilla paw tears it off.

Nut or die. The choice...is yours."

When masturbation hurts you get really bored sometimes that can lead to getting yourself in trouble online

You're not living life to you've had a tube like a glitter ball when you open one end it shoots out glitter only it's not glitter it's poop poop.

source for both quotes

 

[Gentlebastard]

As a Monsterfucker (male) this offends me greatly and I demand a apology. I will not suffer to be called a n*rmie like this.

Gorillas don't exist and I defy anyone to prove otherwise.

I wonder if I'm a member of the human race sometimes while looking at these stories

if only i could go back in time and strangle Tim Berners-Lee before he invented this artificial hellscape known as the internet

How does he manage to never, ever improve?

I can't decide if I want him to die faster, or if I'm happy to keep watching it happen slowly.

"Oh i'd love to live in fear of some motherfucker molotov cocktailing my car. That is a sign of a good, smart and functioning society."

What the fuck happened to this thread?

I'm sorry for you not having known a single decent, reasonable person ever.

If it wasn't for the fact society is imploding as result I'd find this funny. Hell it's funny either way.

Oh, I met lots of reasonable people. But not at liberal arts college. Burn it to the ground.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

I just hate anime and like fat chicks.

Fats aren't people.

I missed the part where Jesus said,
"tho shall fuck 500 pound fat chicks"

God helps those who help themselves, so I'll help myself to a plus sized powerhouse with 8 teets so I could live brapily ever after.

God did say
“Go out and multiply”
And if they’re fertile enough to give birth and not fat enough to be infertile I say full speed ahead!

God gives his gayest battles to his dumbest retards.

 

[frozen_runner]

I get my hair cut by a hairy little Italian man in his 60's. Or his son, who's about twenty years younger but also looks like he's 60. They both kind of look like Fanucci from The Godfather movies.

Do you have a link to this story? I want to be mad.

Next time I will explain how Saxons created NASA and then landed on the Moon. Your ancestors are retarded compared to mine.

Damn Scots, they ruined Scotland!

How fat do you have to be before you’re actually bulletproof?

How do you hide your autismo? Sooner or later, you're gonna ask for chicken tendies.

My country is mad gay, and I am ashamed of it

She may or may not speak all languages, but she speaks my language.
REEEEEE REEEEEEEEEEEEE

You think your doing coke, nope it's angle dust.

I should get to play a game that doesn't have a nigger in it.

Well...... She didn't twerk; so I guess that's pretty good for the black people.

I don't know if Jews are involved in this article, but I am going to call for their annihilation anyway. EAT SHIT JEWBAGS.

Don't trust anyone with the Blaire White phenotype.