Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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It seems like any community centered around discussion and the philosophy of polyamory are just circle jerking in an attempt to justify their degenerate wants and behavior. If you really were in a loving relationship, married, had children (I mean really, some people in these posts really have all that), you'd think that would be enough to satiate. I can understand an unhappy marriage, you end it with divorce or find some means to an end there. People who get roped up into these situations must play some mental gymnastics with themselves to justify letting their partners sleep around. That's psychological torture. But, sexuality is complicated - some even get off to that.

Cuckoldry is truly something I can't understand, and by extension, polyamory, too.
 
AprilRains said:
Their pleasure is not my business!
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What pleasure? Endless wondering and discussing about every detail of the relationship and making up theories left and right and reading philosophy, hoping all is well and you are doing everything right, all while helping this other dude push so his seed is deep enough in your wife because she wants a baby.

All that effort and thinking, all that time wasted, and for what? So there might be some extra fucking in it for you? Or not. Ask Allison Rap's husband. And for his lack of succes he was pimped out to men.

If that is pleasure, let me sleep and be depressed.
 
Crunchy Leaf said:
the poly idea that you don't have to care about anyone else's feelings is really appalling to me and also makes me wonder what kind of upbringing they had. like in normal people world going out with the guy your friend had a bad breakup with six months ago makes you a jerk. and there's tons of other times when normal people will change their behavior to not hurt their friends because they care about their friends' feelings because why wouldn't they?
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there are a few factions within the poly ranks so it is hard to generalize about upbringing. The main split is between people who are gulliable/naive for whatever reason (including autism) and cluster B personality disordered people. Autism and cluster B have immaturity and lack of empathy in common. The normal-empathy doormats of these relationships seem to shuffle in and out of the poly community frequently.
 
CamelCursive said:
"What they do is none of my business" is how we thought about drag queens, and now they're reading storybooks to kids and trying to put little boys in stripper outfits.
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The Asians were unto something with this whole "saving face" and "bringing shame unto your family and ancestors" thing. Goddammit, we should have listened to the religious wackos!
 
Crunchy Leaf said:
it's when you insist you and your fuckbuddies and your fuckbuddies' fuckbuddies all sit around at a kitchen table and discuss your feelings
or, when you insist the spouse you've cuckolded has to be friends with your new piece
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The kitchen is a really, really bad place to have emotionally sensitive conversations. Knives. Cleavers. Burners. Anyone who has worked the crime beat on a newspaper can tell you that you never want to have an argument in a kitchen.
 
Crunchy Leaf said:
it's when you insist you and your fuckbuddies and your fuckbuddies' fuckbuddies all sit around at a kitchen table and discuss your feelings
or, when you insist the spouse you've cuckolded has to be friends with your new piece
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Christ, these fucking people have found a way to take even cuckoldry and make it worse.
 
How fucking hard is it to just be in a relationship? Part of what’s so confusingly fascinating to me about polyamory is that in an effort to make things “easier” it just makes everything infinitely more complicated and difficult.
 
AprilRains said:
i hate to ask but what is that
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To give a more detailed answer, polyamory isn't just a "single" thing - there's all kinds of shapes and forms.

"Kitchen Table" poly (primarily) focuses on everyone involved in the relationship (you, your wife, her boyfriend, your girlfriend, your girlfriend's boyfriend, etc) knowing one another and everyone having some level of relationship (think of it like a dorm room/family). It usually (but not always) implies there isn't a hierarchy of any sort and that everyone is an equal part of the relationship and they spend time together as a group frequently (if they don't outright live together) even if they all aren't romantically involved with one another. It's basically poly with a built-in support group; so if your girlfriend's boyfriend wants to nail your wife you can just hang out with your wife's boyfriend since you both have the night off, essentially.

This is a contrast to "normal" poly (I know) where there's usually a "main" relationship (ex a husband and wife) that everything else stems from. To the husband, his girlfriend is not as important as his wife and to the wife her boyfriend isn't as important has her husband, and so on. In "regular" poly it isn't common for your husband to ever meet your boyfriend, it's way less common for them to be friends (some husbands will meet boyfriends initially for "approval" reasons) and it's remarkably uncommon for your boyfriend to ever meet your husband's girlfriend.
 
scathefire said:
How fucking hard is it to just be in a relationship? Part of what’s so confusingly fascinating to me about polyamory is that in an effort to make things “easier” it just makes everything infinitely more complicated and difficult.
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It's an attempt to reinvent the wheel because they took some retarded women studies classes in their undergrad/masters program that took them a decade to complete and clearly know how things work better than everyone else. It's a delightful mix of dunning-kruger, BPD, and hippy-dippy shit. What's amusing is that I mentioned this in passing to my parents once and they even said that when they were my age there were the exact same types of people doing the exact same shit. Time is a flat circle.
 
Immaculacy said:
Cuckoldry is truly something I can't understand, and by extension, polyamory, too.
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What pleasure there is to be a cuck is actually really easy to explain, although there few different types. Of course what gets one# motor going can be mix of multiple reasons but I have noticed three different main types. I’m using here wife and husband as an example but genders or actual government seal of approval doesn’t really matter.

Type 1) Those that get pleasure from humiliating experiences
Getting some pleasure from humiliation is fairly normal because intensely humiliating experiences get your blood bumping. It just one way to get adrenaline going and some people are junkies to that stuff. To these people it usually goes hand in hand with other BDMS type stuff. Your wife getting on with a other man rather you can be deliciously humiliating and painful to this type.

Type 2) Those that like their wife being desirable
Many guys like feel that they are winning if they get the woman whom everyone wants to nail. Cuck thing can work kinda as that. Those other guys like my wife so much that they have hot sex with her but unlike them I’m actually married to this woman so I win. Basically they find to be an ego boost.

Type 3) Those that like to watch
If you really enjoy watching and like your wife this can be way to combine those. Sure you can watch she masturbates or record their own porn but that isn’t the same as real time sex. To these cuck is just acceptable price they are willing to pay to get watch a play staring their wife. Depending on the guy he might prefer to spy or be in same room (maybe even giving directions).
 
Amber the Hedgehog said:
What pleasure there is to be a cuck is actually really easy to explain, although there few different types. Of course what gets one# motor going can be mix of multiple reasons but I have noticed three different main types. I’m using here wife and husband as an example but genders or actual government seal of approval doesn’t really matter.

Type 1) Those that get pleasure from humiliating experiences
Getting some pleasure from humiliation is fairly normal because intensely humiliating experiences get your blood bumping. It just one way to get adrenaline going and some people are junkies to that stuff. To these people it usually goes hand in hand with other BDMS type stuff. Your wife getting on with a other man rather you can be deliciously humiliating and painful to this type.

Type 2) Those that like their wife being desirable
Many guys like feel that they are winning if they get the woman whom everyone wants to nail. Cuck thing can work kinda as that. Those other guys like my wife so much that they have hot sex with her but unlike them I’m actually married to this woman so I win. Basically they find to be an ego boost.

Type 3) Those that like to watch
If you really enjoy watching and like your wife this can be way to combine those. Sure you can watch she masturbates or record their own porn but that isn’t the same as real time sex. To these cuck is just acceptable price they are willing to pay to get watch a play staring their wife. Depending on the guy he might prefer to spy or be in same room (maybe even giving directions).
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So the ones eating the creampie are an extreme of type 1? That must be what happens with polyamory, so they are type 1 I guess.

Maybe the poly ones are just done with life in general, completely nihilist, thinking people will cheat anyway so better to be open about it. Some people out there are just unable to be monogamous. We all know at least 1. I can see them all bonding together and be miserable, thinking of ways to excuse their piss poor impulse control by explaining each and every nuance in any type of relationship.
 
Francis Dollarhyde said:
So the ones eating the creampie are an extreme of type 1? That must be what happens with polyamory, so they are type 1 I guess.
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Well they can be extreme versions of 1 or 2 depending on their reasons. Eating cum can be humiliating sure but it can also be a concrete sign that your wife is hot. She got that other guy off but that hot pussy ultimately yours. You can remove the other guy because she has chosen you over the others. People are wierd and have wierd mind games.
 
Found this rather depressing polyamory post on r/polyamory.
784571

archive.li

Advise. Wife insists on closed triad to protect me. : polyamory

archived 4 Jun 2019 02:53:26 UTC
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Wife wants a closed triad because she sees OP as "too fragile". Then OP talks about meeting a couple where the husband self medicates while his wife gets laid.
 
Amber the Hedgehog said:
What pleasure there is to be a cuck is actually really easy to explain, although there few different types. Of course what gets one# motor going can be mix of multiple reasons but I have noticed three different main types. I’m using here wife and husband as an example but genders or actual government seal of approval doesn’t really matter.

Type 1) Those that get pleasure from humiliating experiences
Getting some pleasure from humiliation is fairly normal because intensely humiliating experiences get your blood bumping. It just one way to get adrenaline going and some people are junkies to that stuff. To these people it usually goes hand in hand with other BDMS type stuff. Your wife getting on with a other man rather you can be deliciously humiliating and painful to this type.

Type 2) Those that like their wife being desirable
Many guys like feel that they are winning if they get the woman whom everyone wants to nail. Cuck thing can work kinda as that. Those other guys like my wife so much that they have hot sex with her but unlike them I’m actually married to this woman so I win. Basically they find to be an ego boost.

Type 3) Those that like to watch
If you really enjoy watching and like your wife this can be way to combine those. Sure you can watch she masturbates or record their own porn but that isn’t the same as real time sex. To these cuck is just acceptable price they are willing to pay to get watch a play staring their wife. Depending on the guy he might prefer to spy or be in same room (maybe even giving directions).
Click to expand...
Why are they all ugly though? (In your view: I have my own)
 
Peachy said:
Found this rather depressing polyamory post on r/polyamory.
View attachment 784571
archive.li

Advise. Wife insists on closed triad to protect me. : polyamory

archived 4 Jun 2019 02:53:26 UTC
archive.li archive.li
Wife wants a closed triad because she sees OP as "too fragile". Then OP talks about meeting a couple where the husband self medicates while his wife gets laid.
Click to expand...
I would encourage the husband to say “no” and get ready for divorce just in case. It’s clear that wife is engaging with shady people and that will not end well. Being bi doesn’t mean that you need to have sex and/or romance with both men and women to be happy. That’s excuse for something else. Assuming that wife is similar age as husband it could be a middle age crisis and feeling unattractive. That’s something poky most certainly won’t fix. Just because you are having issues with late diagnosis of ADHD doesn’t mean you should let her walk over you. If her priorities aren’t with her husband in his time of need that’s a big red flag. Let her know that you don’t think this good idea and that if dating is must for then maybe it’s better if you two do it after separating. That might sting at moment alot but you will avoid bigger drama that will result getting engaged with couple in crisis like she wants to.
 
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