🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

  • 🏰 The Fediverse is up. If you know, you know.
  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account

Will Ralph see Xander on November 15th?

  • Yes

  • No

Results are only viewable after voting.
Father of the Year 2024 Ethan "if you wanna know the truth about it, I wish I was drunk and on pills bish" Ralph can't think of a gift for his biological son that loves Ralph more than his mother Faith.
 
The Ambien fairy visited piggy again. He'll force his poor son to spend supervised visits with the strange smelly man.
Screenshot_20250105_173337_X.jpg
Screenshot_20250105_174238_Chrome.jpg
We bullied him into buying presents for his son after the cheapskate didn't bring him any for the last few visits. Being the useless bum that he is, he needs Dingo to figure out what his son might like.
Screenshot_20250105_173357_X.jpg
 
Ralph has that pesky Insomnia/Narcolepsy that Rekieta has. Sometimes he's awake so long he goes days without rest, other times he sleeps 12 hours straight accidentally.

Also, so much for not saying when he's going to California. San Diego, January 10th! Hope the insomnia/Narcolepsy doesn't cause any airport mishaps.
 
Mynameisdark said:
Ralph has that pesky Insomnia/Narcolepsy that Rekieta has. Sometimes he's awake so long he goes days without rest, other times he sleeps 12 hours straight accidentally.

Also, so much for not saying when he's going to California. San Diego, January 10th! Hope the insomnia/Narcolepsy doesn't cause any airport mishaps.
Click to expand...
Let's recap:

--Debilitating alcohol and benzodiazepene dependence

--Gimpy gayarm (impervious to all lolicon and teenage girls, yet susceptible to nap time)

--A body like a warm sack of urine with accompanying smell

--A Tard Passport issued by the Kingdom of Seychelles or some shit

--A compulsion to check Twatter constantly on an electronic device he's prone to misplacing

My last plane trip went amazingly, as I possess only o--I mean, none of these things. Guess I'm bishmade.

I was going to suggest a poll, where we predict what will go wrong on THIS Xanda Run, but I think we know.
 
Piggy spends his Sunday with his favorite activity, seething and sperging on Twitter. Gets owned by an anon.
Screenshot_20250105_211956_X.jpg
SEETHING with 3 typos (smart)
Screenshot_20250105_211936_X.jpg
Bonus: Delusions of grandeur, most likely pill-induced
Screenshot_20250105_212012_X.jpg
 
Rage Pig said:
The Ambien fairy visited piggy again. He'll force his poor son to spend supervised visits with the strange smelly man.
View attachment 6823294
View attachment 6823321
We bullied him into buying presents for his son after the cheapskate didn't bring him any for the last few visits. Being the useless bum that he is, he needs Dingo to figure out what his son might like.
View attachment 6823303
Click to expand...
"My first wife"? He was never married or even engaged to Faith, lmao. And even if he was she would have been wife #2 since he was already married to Nora before that. Is he that wet brained or is he trying to come off as less of a loser for having multiple children out of wedlock with several different babymommas?
 
Lidl Drip said:
"My first wife"? He was never married or even engaged to Faith, lmao. And even if he was she would have been wife #2 since he was already married to Nora before that. Is he that wet brained or is he trying to come off as less of a loser for having multiple children out of wedlock with several different babymommas?
Click to expand...
A little bit of this. A little bit of that.
 
has anyone posed the theory that his gimpy arm is a result of opiate overdose? allow me to explain a little...i was a heavy opiate user for about a decade and several of my friends throughout that time overdosed. 90% of the ones who survived and were "out" for any prolonged period of time, lets say over an hour, experienced a medical condition known as necrosis. essentially, the muscles atrophy during the overdose primarily on the side in which the person is leaning.

for example, two of my friends OD'd and were laying on their sides and both of them had the same thing happen in the respective arm and leg they were laying on. if you're not out for too long, they can graft more tissue to the areas to help rebuild it but often times it renders the limb inoperable to a high degree if not entirely, at least initially. overtime, sensation can return but its a very long process.

that being said. this happened to ethan when he slept for some ungodly amount of time, during a period of time where he had access to heavy opiates and suddenly he's got a necrotic arm. it's easy to say "i got a nerve issue" or whatever he said to get people off the trail and to be fair, most people wouldn't make this possible connection. but my circumstances and experiences in the past lead me to believe that is what happened. his arm literally looks and functions identically to both of my friends that i mentioned above.

could be a total crack-theory or possibly a theory rooted in reality...either way, this has been: A Gunt Theory.

also, what kind of faggot, out-of-touch retarded diva needs his stream buddies to help him pick out gifts for his child? has he not been visiting his child? wouldn't he have an idea of what sorts of shit his kid would be into? or do him and his son just sit there and commiserate over a-logs and corn? even still, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know what kids like...they like pretty much ANYTHING at that age and at the end of the day, you're just going to swing through dollar general and grab him some fucked up bubble wand or something faggoty.

either way, god bless the goal.
 
jewsernotfound said:
has anyone posed the theory that his gimpy arm is a result of opiate overdose? allow me to explain a little...i was a heavy opiate user for about a decade and several of my friends throughout that time overdosed. 90% of the ones who survived and were "out" for any prolonged period of time, lets say over an hour, experienced a medical condition known as necrosis. essentially, the muscles atrophy during the overdose primarily on the side in which the person is leaning.
Click to expand...
It’s nerve entrapment and he got it from being passed out on pills and booze like your friends when they passed out. Normally the body wakes up and you toss and turn in your sleep to prevent damage but when you’re high on Xanax and booze you don’t.
 
jewsernotfound said:
could be a total crack-theory or possibly a theory rooted in reality...either way, this has been: A Gunt Theory.
Click to expand...
This isn't even really speculative. It's obviously what happened to Ralph. Because of extreme drug abuse, he passed out on his arm to the point he paralyzed it from damage from blockage of blood flow.

That's just what happened.

This is the kind of shit that happens to severe drug addicts.
 
jewsernotfound said:
has anyone posed the theory that his gimpy arm is a result of opiate overdose?
Click to expand...

AncientPhosphur said:
It’s nerve entrapment and he got it from being passed out on pills and booze
Click to expand...
It could be booze and drug induced neuropathy.
Nerve entrapment is also another form of neuropathy.
It's basically damage to nerve tissue - it can be caused by a lot of things
opiate use.. too much booze...being fat.. all of that shit can cause it.
so ralph is basically a prime target for that kind of shit
 
_e4fcb1bf-ac9c-4b21-857b-c9114f87d921.jpeg
Dear Santa, all i want for christmas is 15 minutes supervised playtime with my drucken dad, before he absconds to a hooker, for christmas.

Yours truly
Xandor
 
Last edited by a moderator:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom