📚 Megathread Phil's Crowdfunding Adventures - Smokes weed every day, claims bipolar disorder

[Positron]

The only kind of punch Phil is familiar with is a sucker punch, because he's a fucking coward.

He's only been sucker punched once in his life, because he's a fucking coward.
The only punch he is familiar with is "fruit punch": the shit he got by pouring his Mexican soda into Slingblade's emptied bottles.

 

[The Dude]

He's only been sucker punched once in his life, because he's a fucking coward.
The only punch he is familiar with is "fruit punch": the shit he got by pouring his Mexican soda into Slingblade's emptied bottles.

You misunderstood me. Phil is only familiar with THROWING sucker punches. He's only attacked people when he's surprising them or when they can't defend themselves, like when they are an invalid in a wheelchair or much smaller than him. He's a coward and would never get into a fair fight with someone who can defend themselves. He's a yellow, ambushing pansy.

And that beating he got at Occupy wasn't a sucker punch. He pissed off someone he thought couldn't or wouldn't retaliate because he was much smaller than Phil. The little guy proved Phil wrong and beat Phil's fat ass black and blue while Phil helplessly took every punch. I don't think Phil was even able to throw any punches of his own. I could be wrong, but I believe that's when he started packing knives and pepper spray. Getting beat down like that had a huge impact on Phil, maybe more than any other moment in his life. It painfully proved to Phil that he's not the badass he thinks he is and can't even defend himself from a skinny little white college kid. So now he weighs himself down with dull edge lord knives and pepper spray in hopes of deterring anyone from messing with him, and he keeps all his tough talk on social media where he's safe in his apartment.

 

[AnOminous]

So now he weighs himself down with dull edge lord knives and pepper spray in hopes of deterring anyone from messing with him, and he keeps all his tough talk on social media where he's safe in his apartment.

And even with all that he is still a coward and a weakling and if he fucked with someone with his mall ninja shit, they'd still beat him senseless, but they'd be even angrier if he tried to pull any shit with an actual weapon, and actually seriously beat him. If he got "lucky" and got in a slash, unless it was fatal because even a moron can cause a fatal injury with a knife, he'd be killed.

If he lived, he'd end up in prison where he'd be marked as a little bitch the day he got in and savagely beaten every single day until he got put in protective custody.

 

[Coldgrip]

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See, I'm actually okay with people donating money to Phil, and here's my reason for that; who is most likely to donate to Phil? Other wannabe anarchist or pretend commies, in other words, people who mooch welfare off the government.

Now what does Phil do with that money? Why, spend it on frivolous bullshit. That's right, Philip Haskins-Delici supports capitalism with every purchase he makes. Even better, by begging for money from others like him he makes sure that money that could of been used by other commies instead is going to end up back in Uncle Sam's pocket.

So every donation to Phil is another massive sucker punch to people like Antifa, and helps to bolster America's economy.

If he lived, he'd end up in prison where he'd be marked as a little bitch the day he got in and savagely beaten every single day until he got put in protective custody.

They'd make him regret getting that stupid teardrop tattoo.

 

[MasterDisaster]

I want Phil to get a gun. Doesn't matter what kind. Just a gun. The sheer amount of self-absorbed ego he would exude would out-do his own natural odor. He tuck that thing into his pants just to walk from his bed to the kitchen, whipping it out and pretending someone was coming through the door. He'd idolize it, put it on a pedestal...and sure as shit he'd be at the next really, going out of his way to start shit with people because this time he's got a gun. First chance he get he'll whip it out (wishful thinking is it slips out of his hand, hits the ground and misfires, hitting someone) and try to seize control of the situation.

Then he just get's the ever loving piss beat out of him. His cheap, shoddy mall ninja gear does nothing to protect him. The helmet cracks, the 'body armor' does nothing; all of his aintifa friends have already fled...Phil fulfilled his duty as jail fodder.

That's why you always bring someone dumb, slow and fat to a rally. Easiest to catch, funnest to beat up.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

That's why you always bring someone dumb, slow and fat to a rally. Easiest to catch, funnest to beat up.

I do wonder if this is why Antifa put up with him doing his “I’m in charge! Me! I’m Crime Minister!” crap while looking as conspicuous as possible. Let the Proud Boys and the police focus on the fat tard dressed like a special needs ninja while everyone else hops it.

 

[MasterDisaster]

I do wonder if this is why Antifa put up with him doing his “I’m in charge! Me! I’m Crime Minister!” crap while looking as conspicuous as possible. Let the Proud Boys and the police focus on the fat tard dressed like a special needs ninja while everyone else hops it.

Phil would make the perfect hype bitch/jail dummy. Pump up his ego, stand behind him and use him as a buffer to start shit. These idiots need conflict to stand out so starting fights and throwing expendable meat puppets under the bus is the status quo. Then they just let him sit in jail as a martyr while his greasy ass expects them to come and bail him out.

 

[The Dude]

I do wonder if this is why Antifa put up with him doing his “I’m in charge! Me! I’m Crime Minister!” crap while looking as conspicuous as possible. Let the Proud Boys and the police focus on the fat tard dressed like a special needs ninja while everyone else hops it.

I think the answer is more mundane than that: Phil doesn't actually know anyone in Antifa and no one in Antifa keeps tabs on Phil. It's just Phil and his little circle of Ain't-ifa playmates LARPing as Supper Sloppers in a power fantasy circle jerk.

 

[AnOminous]

Phil would make the perfect hype bitch/jail dummy. Pump up his ego, stand behind him and use him as a buffer to start shit. These idiots need conflict to stand out so starting fights and throwing expendable meat puppets under the bus is the status quo. Then they just let him sit in jail as a martyr while his greasy ass expects them to come and bail him out.

It would be hilarious if this happens and he ends up a jailed antifa hero but he's getting his ass kicked and fucked and gets desperate to get out.

Meanwhile, they realize he's completely fucking retarded and would blow his image immediately if they actually did get him out.

So antifa engages in hilarious hijinks to make sure their hero they're demonstrating to get released in "Free Phil" demonstrations actually stays behind bars.

OC DONUT STEEL.

 

[Hellfire]

"After Rent and Bills, I end up having to put a large sum of my disposable income into direct action equipment, weaponry, and what little anarchist and antifascist literature I can acquire ethically sourced from eBay sellers, infoshops, and anarchist distros.

Because of all the revolution building, antifa response calls around the Portland area, and spreading of libertarian communist propaganda - I spend little in the way of food and drink outside of food stamps, food banks, and the occasional kindness of like-minded comrades."

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

"After Rent and Bills, I end up having to put a large sum of my disposable income into direct action equipment, weaponry, and what little anarchist and antifascist literature I can acquire ethically sourced from eBay sellers, infoshops, and anarchist distros.

Because of all the revolution building, antifa response calls around the Portland area, and spreading of libertarian communist propaganda - I spend little in the way of food and drink outside of food stamps, food banks, and the occasional kindness of like-minded comrades."
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Can't work due to being mental, but can spend all day organising, going to meetings, protests, being revolutionary. Okay, fat boy.

A. Phil has no mental health issues that aren't tumblr bullshit, he's just autistic and borderline re.tarded. Sped schools like the one Phil went to don't teach revolutionary politics. Phil's autism doesn't prevent him from working, but his laziness sure does.

B. Phil doesn't do anything but sit at home wearing military gear all day, posing with toy guns. Occasionally he'll ride public transport and spend his time outside shitting himself in fear of transphobes, proud boys, Kiwi Farmers and random lone black men. If he didn't spend his welfare money on labelled hoodies and plastic guns, he'd be able to afford food and utilities no problem.

Get a job, Phil.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

“Because of all the Antifa response calls around Portland.” My sides. I’m envisioning something like Ghostbusters, only they’re all really fat and ECTO-1 is a shortbus.

 

[The Dude]

"After Rent and Bills, I end up having to put a large sum of my disposable income into direct action equipment, weaponry, and what little anarchist and antifascist literature I can acquire ethically sourced from eBay sellers, infoshops, and anarchist distros.

Because of all the revolution building, antifa response calls around the Portland area, and spreading of libertarian communist propaganda - I spend little in the way of food and drink outside of food stamps, food banks, and the occasional kindness of like-minded comrades."
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Phil isn't "forced" to live on $10,000/yr. He is entirely to blame for his financial situation. Laziness and being covered in horribly designed tattoos are not "mental health issues". If he would get off his dead ass and actually put some effort into looking for a job he could probably find one willing to hire him for something that isn't in sight of customers, so long as he wore a long-sleeved shirt and left his mall ninja crap at home. He wouldn't even have to give up his tard welfare either. He might even be able to finally afford a real gun instead of airsoft toys (if he was able to find someone willing to sell to an obvious tard like Phil).

Anyone coming here to find out about Phil, don't be fooled. All his talk about Communism and "disabilities" is all utter bullshit. He's just a lazy man with Autism who is terrified of ever having to do actual work or make actual effort. He just wants everything given to him without having to make any effort to earn it on his part. Then he makes up bullshit pity stories about how he's about to starve or "solidarity against Kiwi Farms and Patriot Prayer" to sucker people into giving him money, and when they do he just ends up wasting it on edgy clothes and Antifa can cozies and airsoft guns that he can pose with in photos to pretend he's a badass revolutionary. That money never ever goes to whatever Phil says it will. It's always new toys, edgy clothes, and props for his power fantasies. He's addicted to consumerism.

 

[Positron]

11 Mar 2019

 

[Tragi-Chan]

11 Mar 2019
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Let’s see if Portland gets taken over by fascists in the 4 days Antifa are off playing hide-and-seek and spunky biscuit in the woods.

 

[Jaded Optimist]

Odds on Toren stripping anything of value and bailing while Phil is gone?

 

[Deadpool]

Odds on Toren stripping anything of value and bailing while Phil is gone?

75% with the other 25% being, changing the locks, tossing Phil's tard collections (with the exceptions of anything worth selling) in a dumpster, and moving a new troon paypig into the appartment.

 

[The Dude]

So Phil is gonna go play soldier with some other poseurs? Or has Antifa finally tired of Phil's bullshit and just don't want to haul the body that far?

"Oh yeah Izzy, we're taking you out for Antifa Super Soldier training. When we're done with you no one will ever screw with you again. What? That hole in the ground? Yeah, uh...that's a foxhole. Now just lay down in the "foxhole" while we load the gun for you..."

75% with the other 25% being, changing the locks, tossing Phil's tard collections (with the exceptions of anything worth selling) in a dumpster, and moving a new troon paypig into the appartment.

Slingblade isn't on the lease so changing the locks would do fuck-all. Phil would just have to go to the landlord and tell them his guest changed the locks and to call the cops.

 

[Deadpool]

So Phil is gonna go play soldier with some other poseurs? Or has Antifa finally tired of Phil's bullshit and just don't want to haul the body that far?

"Oh yeah Izzy, we're taking you out for Antifa Super Soldier training. When we're done with you no one will ever screw with you again. What? That hole in the ground? Yeah, uh...that's a foxhole. Now just lay down in the "foxhole" while we load the gun for you..."



Slingblade isn't on the lease so changing the locks would do fuck-all. Phil would just have to go to the landlord and tell them his guest changed the locks and to call the cops.

I didn't mean it would work. Just that Jon is scummy, and dumb enough to try.

 

[Adamska]

11 Mar 2019
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Can't resist the temptation to migrate like a retarded penguin again Phil? Because I remember quite fondly you crowing about your little trips from Oakland to Portland back when you were deemed people in Oakland.

Bet it's to the gun range up in Ain't ifa again due to feeling like the powerless anger filled mong he is.