My Homestead Adventure - A stupid city slicker bumbles through the woods

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Нарру Саmреr

/watch?v=yA5lujNlkn8
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 4, 2024
Hello, fellow sneeders!

Certain events convinced me to stop living in a society and transition to living like a lunatic in the woods. I sold my house, moved far away, and bought a lot of raw land for cheap (less than $2,000 per acre.) Due to the fact that I am stupid, I did things I wasn't properly prepared to do and had to figure things out after the fact. Nevertheless, I had fun throughout the start of my troubles and will continue to incur more troubles as I stubbornly develop a homestead for myself. I want to share what I do in hopes others who want "leave society" find the confidence to just do it.

This is what my land looks like. It's beautiful and serene. If not for a considerable mosquito presence, I'd call it paradise.
muh land.png

The land doesn't only come with ample supply of wood (which literally grows on trees), there's an ample supply of free berries!
bunchberry field.jpg bunchberries.jpg
Using a handy plant identifying website, I'm confident these are bunchberries. They're edible, albeit not very appetizing, according to cursory Internet searches for cornus canadensis. These grow in acidic soils, bogs, and mountain regions. An Internet search for crops that like acidic soil says that currants, blueberries, rhubarb, parsley, potatoes, beans, broccoli, carrots, sweet corn, cucumbers, turnips, parsnips, elderberries, and cranberries grow well, which helps enable me to grow my own food when the time comes. I might not need raised beds or planters, just the dirt under my feet.

The bog and mountain region part seems to be true in my case. My land is at the bottom of a mountain range and there's a wetland not far. One of my blunders was venturing onto an area with little tree growth. There was a well traveled trail, so I know people have gone through there regularly, but I underestimated the mud. This UTV has a 14 inch ground clearance and aggressive tires, but it can't drive through milkshake. Thankfully, there's a way around the bog. It takes longer to reach my land, but it's safer that way.
stuck in mud 1.jpg
If $2,000 per acre seems really cheap, there's a reason: the land I bought is deep in the woods. Accessing it requires towing an off-road vehicle (they're not road-legal) to a trail, driving miles on the trail, fording enormous puddles, then venturing off the trail where no one goes. If not for the fact that I still get a trickle of cellular data out there to help me navigate with map app, I don't think I could make it to the place I took the first picture.

Exploring around, I saw some cool things. This is mooseberry, or squashberry, or highbush cranberry, or crampbark, or one of a bunch of other names but its scientific name is viburnum edule. It's supposed to be edible, but tastes like soap (not that I've tried.) The berries and bark seem to have medicinal uses, which bodes well for self-sufficiency.
mooseberries.jpg

There happens to be a lake beyond the edge of my property, within publicly owned land. I don't know if it contains fish, but I saw ducks swimming. They're present in the photo, but you almost can't see them. Everyone warns you to not drink standing water, but if I can't manage to dig a well, I could filter and boil the water from this lake. Near the lake was this beautiful flower, blue flag. Unlike the other plants I've mentioned so far, this one is considered poisonous. Plantnet has been an indispensible starting point to learn about plants I know nothing about. Emergency services won't come for you when you're blasting out of both ends if you're innawoods.
lake.jpg blue flag.jpg



Now, I have some questions that I hope someone out there can help answer.

There seems to be only birch and spruce in the area. I plan to build a log cabin and all the spruce looks thin and pathetic, so my only option is to cut down the straightest birch trees I can find. However, I worry about the quality of the wood. Take a look at these. These trees seem to be rusting, but only metal rusts, so what is this? The tree in the second picture also had these little holes in the bark as well. Is that a bad sign or is that normal? In the third photo, the bark seems to be peeling or molting. Is that normal for birch trees? Are these specimens healthy? Infected?
rusty birch (2).jpg rusty birch.jpg peeling bark.jpg

Speaking of infections, it seems no tree is completely immune to fungus or lichen. First, does anyone know what sort of mushroom/fungus this is? I didn't see much of it and the hoof shape is distinct. Second, lichen was much more commonly found. I'm sure the mushroom makes the infected tree bad building material, but what about lichen? That stuff will grow on rocks because algae or cyanobacteria supply the energy, so it shouldn't affect the wood, right? Are there any lumberjacks or millers here who can tell me what to look for and avoid when picking my trees to cut?
odd fungus (2).jpg odd fungus.jpg

Then, there's this. It was so odd I felt compelled to take a picture. I asked only one person what it might be, and I was told this was bear dung. Is that true? If this isn't bear dung, what is it?
poop.jpg

Anyway, I hope this was a decent enough OP. I'll keep posting updates as they happen. For now, I need to save up more money to buy more equipment so I can start prepping logs and digging a well.
 
God speed anon, I hope you're able to build your dream cabin and live the hermit lifestyle. Just try not to get mauled by bears, or stuck in a mud bog in the process of doing so.

the bark seems to be peeling or molting. Is that normal for birch trees? Are these specimens healthy? Infected?
Birch trees are known for their peeling bark, but as for your other problems I can't say. The brown could possibly be a fungal disease, and the holes could be from insects, but I'm not an arborist so take what I say with a grain of salt.
 
Take samples to a tree nursery, they identify lichens/fungii etc for free so they can sell you the treatments. Once you know what you're dealing with you can develop a plan (leave it alone because it's fine or treat it to improve health).

Also if you're serious I would make the investment now before you fully transition (lol) by planting most or all of the crops you mentioned so you can get an idea of how much work you'll need to invest and what sort of bounty you'll get from your crops. That will make it much easier to plan for food (how much to can etc) when winter comes.

And yeah, get a well dug STAT.
 
Speaking from experience, You'll want a plan for teraforming before you go building anything. Note things like drainage, puddle locations, slope, and places with a lot of stagnant water / sunlight. Then take some dirt, and analyze it. You don't have to be a genius to tell if you have too much organics / sand / clay in the dirt, but also get it PH tested. Bring out some soil amendments. Non-organic soil amending goes a long way, but it takes time. If you want to grow berries, you'll want some elemental sulfur to lower the PH. If you want cabbages, carrots, cucumbers, garlic and the like, get some dolomite lime to raise the PH. Other neutral materials like Gypsum will make most any plant happy. I don't recommend hauling in organics. You've got plenty of organic material around you. Potash will turn any dead organic material into usable dirt in no time!

Soil amendments take a lot of time to become part of the ecosystem, but they are also a low maintenance solution. you can practically dump it on the ground and rake it into the dirt and be set for the year.
Looking forward to reading more!
 
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Speaking of infections, it seems no tree is completely immune to fungus or lichen. First, does anyone know what sort of mushroom/fungus this is?
Looks like a tinder fungus.

"The species produces very large polypore fruit bodies which are shaped like a horse's hoof and vary in colour from a silvery grey to almost black, though they are normally brown. It grows on the side of various species of tree, which it infects through broken bark, causing rot. The species typically continues to live on trees long after they have died, changing from a parasite to a decomposer.

Though inedible, F. fomentarius has traditionally seen use as the main ingredient of amadou, a material used primarily as tinder, but also used to make clothing and other items. The 5,000-year-old Ötzi the Iceman carried four pieces of F. fomentarius, concluded to be for use as tinder. It also has medicinal and other uses."
 
And yeah, get a well dug STAT.
Having water on site will let you stay out there longer, without having to haul water or filtration gear back and forth.

For standalone, remote well drilling for 1 person, enough to get you started, my recommendation is something like a hand pump well. You can do all the work yourself (with some heavy lifting), the parts are cheap and commonly available, and the lake means the water table is probably close enough to the surface for you. Keep in mind this only works for areas where the water is 25 feet or less from the surface.

There's two videos on YouTube by Bushradical to get you started, one where he drills the well and one where he does a deep dive on the parts and techniques used. But the best advice would be to ask locals about it, they can tell you about the water, possible locations, and whether the ground is even suitable for driving pipe.


 
The bog and mountain region part seems to be true in my case. My land is at the bottom of a mountain range and there's a wetland not far. One of my blunders was venturing onto an area with little tree growth. There was a well traveled trail, so I know people have gone through there regularly, but I underestimated the mud. This UTV has a 14 inch ground clearance and aggressive tires, but it can't drive through milkshake. Thankfully, there's a way around the bog. It takes longer to reach my land, but it's safer that way.
stuck in mud 1.jpg

If you find dead, downed, or dying tree's might be worth cutting the trunks down and placing across the trail to help shore it up by turning it into a corduroy road/trail
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corduroy_road
Even if it only lasts a season or two, might make getting stuff in and out easier, and can be a side use for logs and other things that are too narrow/small for building a cabin when you pick a spot and need to clear it out.
 
Water is the source of all life and water is what destroys everything. You have to learn the water patterns on your land and understand them exceptionally well before you can build a structure that will last more than a few years.

As for building a log cabin, it is very, very difficult to build one that will last a while using raw materials. It is totally doable, but you’re probably better off spending some money and buying something like a ex-military deuce and a half. and then using that to drag in appropriate logs or other equipment and materials.

I would say that your attempt to build a modern house using a log cabin method is not going to work. Instead, you should be building more of a permanent tent where the log cabin is mainly to block the wind and rain off the ground.

For mosquitoes, you need Biden/IT. https://diypestcontrol.com/mosquitoes.htm. Ignore citronella. Maybe plant catnip everywhere. But spray Bifen/IT for a hundred feet or more around where you live and the mosquito population will go way fucking down. WAY down.

You also need to remove all standing water that you can in all areas around you as much as you can.

But seriously, the cheapest way to get a livable habitation out there is probably beg borrow however get access to deuce and a half or an eight axle military vehicle and drag a mobile home on its head slowly through the forest.

What is the temperature like where you are? Does it freeze? Does it snow? You could also watch the primitive guy on YouTube who builds things out of clay and mud. He does it and has got some pretty good ideas. Make sure it’s the guy who really is doing it not the cheap Chinese knock offs where they fake things with bulldozers.
 
The photo you showed that your friend said was bear scat looks like dead mans fingers.
 
inb4 some autist here manages to geolocate op's location from the cloud coverage or something
I'm 100% sure the tree types, bushes, and pictures are enough to get within 100 miles or so of wherever he is.

Oh also, buy a fucking personal locator beacon - https://www.rei.com/learn/expert-advice/personal-locator-beacons.html or an iPhone 15 or something (and a way to manually charge it!) - as it could seriously be the difference between annoyance and cost and just being found dead ten years later.
 
Are you sure what you want to do is homesteading? Because everything you wrote sounds like primitive living.
  • Homesteading makes use of modern tools and infrastructure. Primitive living does not.
  • Homesteading mostly involves raising livestock and farming. Primitive living is concerned with living off the land without extensive modifications.
  • Homesteading involves permanent structures built with modern methods to last. Primitive living mostly does not.
Pure forest is homesteading on advanced mode, especially above 40° N. You would need extensive knowledge of the environment you admit you do not have. You will need access to equipment you stated currently cannot reach your property because of lack of road access/terrain problems. For instance, I would recommend you use a quonset hut instead of a log cabin, but no concrete truck is getting anywhere near you to build a concrete pad.

I would recommend you read up on primitive living techniques, possibly even accounts recording how the native peoples in that region lived, and decide whether that is what you want or not. Whether you decide on primitive living or homesteading, you will need research and planning to be successful. Good luck.
 
You saw the mud. Ain't no fucking way any concrete pad gonna stay in place.

In that kind of soil you don't use a slab-on-grade foundation without a shitload of gravel for a subsurface.

What you do for a cabin he wants, for that soil profile, is to drill down on all four corners with helixcal piers and use those points with adjustable mountings to adjust for the seasonal/yearly ground movement. Or, if you're broke, throw down some cinderblock slabs at each corner and then again use the adjustable mounts to level out after each winter. It's a lot cheaper.
 
OP,

What are you going to do heat your place? You have wood, but it's green and going to take a year to season.
 
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