Mulan (2020) - Chink War Movie

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I've never wanted a movie to flop as much as this one. It represents everything I hate the most about modern American cinema. Bloodless PG-13 approved war films, senseless remakes, obscene pandering to the Chinese audience, foreign cast with a stupid accent (just put subtitles already. Look at parasite, it was a box-office hit), and so on.

I hope this shit makes less than 100kk domestic. A man can dream.
 
Unfortunately too many Americans just gotta reinforce the stereotype of Americans are too fucking stupid to read subtitles while watching a film or show.
 
The songs won't even be in the movie. Who is this for? Even the other shitty remakes Incorporated the songs. Christ.
 
Disc said:
ER6CBK5UUAAUMze
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Wait, this is a big budget Chinese movie being directed by a woman who's white (and got a bigger budget than the black woman who directed a flop), and they expect us to think that's extraordinarily important? Fuck that, I'm going to watch a more authentic Chinese movie directed by a woman, instead.

Skadoosh.
Kung_Fu_Panda_2_Poster.jpg
 
Kari Kamiya said:
Wait, this is a big budget Chinese movie being directed by a woman who's white (and got a bigger budget than the black woman who directed a flop), and they expect us to think that's extraordinarily important? Fuck that, I'm going to watch a more authentic Chinese movie directed by a woman, instead.

Skadoosh.
Kung_Fu_Panda_2_Poster.jpg
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first one was best one retard
 
Let's remake a movie but take out all the parts people liked. Fucking genius.
The only positive thing about this movie so far is that it has Donnie Yen in it, but that's not a reason to watch it. I bet it flops hard, China hates it, Corona-chan gets blamed and we get at least a few more of these cancerous live action remakes before it stops.
Why would Chinese people want to watch Disney trying to figure out what Chinese people like, when they already have their own movies made by Chinese people who know what stuff Chinese people like? I guess the answer is going to be they don't watch them. It's just embarrassing to see Disney trying so hard and it's so obviously misaimed.
 
Alto said:
Fuck you, Gary Oldman Peacock was metal as fuck.
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True, but Daddy Wolf Captain was the best. He cared so much about the men under his command!
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melty said:
Let's remake a movie but take out all the parts people liked. Fucking genius.
The only positive thing about this movie so far is that it has Donnie Yen in it, but that's not a reason to watch it. I bet it flops hard, China hates it, Corona-chan gets blamed and we get at least a few more of these cancerous live action remakes before it stops.
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I thought Mulan might have been the easiest movie to remake in live-action, honestly. Except for Mushu and the ancestors, most of it is pretty 'grounded' and could be done in-camera by live actors. The story is a classic trope with plenty of room to make some minor adjustments if needed, though honestly how much of the script would really need to be changed? Cast some good actors, maybe ones that can sing or dub over them, make some minor changes, add in some CGI for the bigger fight scenes, done.

I could have done it for less than 100 million with ease, who the fuck is running this company?
 
Not to mention the Condor Warrior series which culminates into a big fight over a pair of "magical" swords, one that can take over the world and the other that can defeat the conquering sword.
 
Ironically, I saw the poster for this movie when I was out watching Rise of Skywalker.

My first thought was, word for word, "What? Why?"
My second thought was "no"
 
Silver Chariot said:
Ironically, I saw the poster for this movie when I was out watching Rise of Skywalker.

My first thought was, word for word, "What? Why?"
My second thought was "no"
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In my local mall, there's a Mulan standee outside of the movie theater.

Lol.
 
So this is going to bomb in China, I think we're all in agreement there... and it's going to be blamed on Corona, which I think is a real shame, because it was obviously *always* going to bomb in China, regardless of the spread of the virus.

Forget all the parts #wokeDisney removed in the remake from the original Mulan "because China wouldn't like them," the major plot of even this Mulan is still the social-justardy (but done well in the original) "women are just as good as men, even on the field of battle," story... That idea obviously falls flat on its face, but even more so in a country that's been killing a shit ton of its female infants for decades now because they can only have one kid and they value males more.

Remove the kickass songs, Eddie Murphy Dragon (and the damn cricket), the actually cool villain (and his even more cool pet falcon), and the "not gay" love interest... Unless you give the main character a penis, China would have always hated this shit.

Not that it isn't funny that now even the few people in China who would have gone for this probably won't see it because of wu-flu...
 
UnKillFill said:
So this is going to bomb in China, I think we're all in agreement there... and it's going to be blamed on Corona, which I think is a real shame, because it was obviously *always* going to bomb in China, regardless of the spread of the virus.

Forget all the parts #wokeDisney removed in the remake from the original Mulan "because China wouldn't like them," the major plot of even this Mulan is still the social-justardy (but done well in the original) "women are just as good as men, even on the field of battle," story... That idea obviously falls flat on its face, but even more so in a country that's been killing a shit ton of its female infants for decades now because they can only have one kid and they value males more.

Remove the kickass songs, Eddie Murphy Dragon (and the damn cricket), the actually cool villain (and his even more cool pet falcon), and the "not gay" love interest... Unless you give the main character a penis, China would have always hated this shit.

Not that it isn't funny that now even the few people in China who would have gone for this probably won't see it because of wu-flu...
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Jesus disney, how hard was it to make the general NWF disguised mulan and then when the truth comes out just make a wtf, why is my pp hard scene
 
So since this is supposedly more accurate to the original story is Mulan gonna follow in Epsteins footsteps?
 
Plague aside, I don't think this will fail on subject matter, but on execution. There have been woman kung fu characters. One of the most enduring girl cartoons in Asia is more or less Mulan squished into a European setting. But those media products only thrived in Asia, and modern Hollywood can't even feel which way the wind is blowing in America anymore. Like hell they can read the room in China.
 
Talking about a perfect storm, not only dividing the movie so that no one agrees on the choices make, but the main target and money maker pulls back.
 
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