💰 Grifter "Mad at the Internet" - a/k/a My Psychotherapy Sessions

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This is not advice, just a comment for users a bit about how this shit works.

In the olden days(my lawn, something something) credit cards were handled by your bank with a "merchant account". You processed them and they handled the payment. Now all that shit has usually been merged into a set of processors like Stripe, Paypal, Google, Amazon. Partially because PCI compliance fucking sucks. Can you still get a traditional merchant account and handle your own PCI... maybe... can you get a merchant account and a payment processor not one of the big named, once again maybe. if you're not banned at the Visa/MC/Amex level and have a bank that does merchant accounts. It's funny, in a sad way, that a web forum and podcaster has more trouble than firearms, porn, "CBD", gambling, etc.

It appears there are some regional/local processing companies left, but it's likely a giant pain in the ass to call each one and explain and see if they ever call back and also call banks for the merchant account side as well.

Also, once a business is established in a location it can be easier to find banks/credit unions/processors with state charters that may employ humans.
 
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I am glad someone reminded Null that Chubby Tomlinson got robbed by his Milwaukee Neighbors while Chubby Tomlinson was at Chubby Cheesesteaks. It's funny because Chubby Tomlinson is fat and low-key hates black people even more than I do, even if he'd never admit to either statement. We all know it's true though.
 
davids877 said:
Now all that shit has usually been merged into a set of processors like Stripe, Paypal, Google, Amazon. Partially because PCI compliance fucking sucks.
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The FedNow service is operational and expanding, there's about 1,200 separate financial institutions participating in it now; but I don't hear null mention it anymore?
 
I wonder if Josh is going to buy a diesel truck later in the future
 
Jotch said:
I really like Phonebooking, very blunt and unmistakable. Can only be confused with physical violence which could be funny.
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I like Phonebooking too, plus it also elucidates the fact it's literally public info you can find in a phonebook. Plus it can be used like

>Someone dropped x's 'book
>Anybody got Nicks 'book?

Can it be shortened or like merged with doxing?

[Music plays]


Phoboxing? Got that dudes Phobox?

Yes Chris, my final answer is C. Phoboxing.

I think I need to sleep.
 
Black Man Underwear said:
Start your own bank. Incorporate in Transnistria. I don't know if I'm joking or not.
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Again, a bank is not a payment processor. I think Null ranted about that a while ago: starting a processor is a lot harder and you need to be in the good boys club of other payment processors, so in the end - everything is fucked. That's how I remember it.
 
Yours Truly 2095 said:
I can't help but view coffee sperging in the same light as weed addicts sperging about their "strain" or whatever. Why are you making bean water so complicated and pretentious.
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I don't care so long as it's a meaningful hobby or routine that they enjoy doing but civilization already peaked with its best coffee/hamburger/whatever fucking ages ago.
 
This is basically how Josh is arriving back to the states.

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Yours Truly 2095 said:
I can't help but view coffee sperging in the same light as weed addicts sperging about their "strain" or whatever. Why are you making bean water so complicated and pretentious.
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I can answer this actually, because I was forced to take the bean-water pill at gunpoint after living with a genuine, “elite barista” and getting turned into a snob.

Coffee is alchemy’s savage summit. There’s about 2000 years of people trying to perfect it in every way, shape, and form. From simple pour over to complicated pressure extractions, you can try a million techniques and you can literally taste the difference. You will have an autistic preference eventually.

And unless you live somewhere with “elite baristas” like Singapore, you have to do it yourself. You have to learn. Because the people making your coffee don’t give a shit about under-oxidating the pour or whatever.

It becomes a routine you do every morning. A little bit of calm before the storm. Something you can do better for yourself than anyone else. So when someone says “nigga I use a Kuerig” you know they are human cabbage and you can make them into a salad.

And then you look into the mirror one morning and you are that guy. Ratty hair, shitty goatee. Little French hat. Holding an oversized mug that says “don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee”. But by that time you are too far gone to realize the horror. Instead you wonder why you chose this oversized mug, with the capacity for a drip over but the surface area to volume ratio of a latte cup. When did your friends stop calling? When was the last time you slept?

There’s a knock on the door. Delivery. Indigo Mountain brand coffee. Malaysian blend. Acidic. You don’t remember ordering it but you don’t question it. Your heart keeps time to the humming grind now.
 
Jotch said:
You need to be the hero and play the stream over the PA speakers wherever you are.
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My biggest fear is listening to MATI at work with bluetooth earbuds and I walk far enough from my phone where the bluetooth disconnects and Joshua Conner "Null" "Moonpie" Moon screams NIGGER on the top of his lungs
 
nickcarkiller said:
My biggest fear is listening to MATI at work with bluetooth earbuds and I walk far enough from my phone where the bluetooth disconnects and Joshua Conner "Null" "Moonpie" Moon screams NIGGER on the top of his lungs
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I have to triple proof read when I'm listening at work that I'm not accidently typing what I'm listening to into my documentation. I've had this nightmare a couple of times
 
nickcarkiller said:
My biggest fear is listening to MATI at work with bluetooth earbuds and I walk far enough from my phone where the bluetooth disconnects and Joshua Conner "Null" "Moonpie" Moon screams NIGGER on the top of his lungs
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Three things:
1. Make sure your phone speaker volume is muted often.
2. Make sure you are using a Browser/Player that stops playback when the audio device changes.
3. Keep your phone on your person when playing to prevent disconnect.
 
Here’s the “free” TV that shows you ads non stop
I know @Null would smash one of these with a hammer if he ever saw one.
 
Jotch said:
Every sweetener has a downside:

Aspartame (Equal, Blue packet): Makes you hungry, and rumors of cancer
Saccharin (Sweet N' Low, Pink packet): Tastes bad (and a laxative)
Stevia (Green packet): Tastes a little bad (and a slight laxative), possibly also kills the white blood cells in your mouth.
Sucralose (Splenda, Yellow packet): Expensive and not truly Calorie free.

I demand sodas be available that use cane sugar. However instead of the teeth rottingly diabetes quantity (12% of the soda by weight!) they use now, a much reduced amount.
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Pepsi makes this which is is pretty good, but still has the high sugar content.

what about Erythritol sweeteners? It's what my monster Zero Ultra uses. I'm sure turbo cancer is in there somewhere...
 
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If you dig around in the faggy health food area you can find soda that is sweetened with regular sugar, but just has tons less than Coca Cola or orange juice.

But usually spendy.

Flavored sparkling water is also an option if you can stand it.
 
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