💼 Careercow Kimberly Crawley - Autistic Game Developer and Creator of Hackers vs. Banksters

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Why didn't she keep the -ster theme with hacker? I've never heard the term bankster.
Never mind, it's a dead term form the thirtys
 
This chick used to be into the whole "We Are Anonymous" thing and there's a video floating around where she's trying to be intimidating and saying "We are legion. We do not forget". I'm sure @Jaimas might remember her now since the video got circulated a bit when she was blaming GG for getting fired. I believe she's removed it since then but there might be a mirror floating somewhere.
 
So, it looks like there's been a TRUE AND HONEST content leak-

AB2.jpg


Bellow is a template version of the above without the background, so you can continue Autgirl and Cockboy's adventures!

girlandcockboyTEMPLATE.png
 
Batman VS Tony Danza said:
This chick used to be into the whole "We Are Anonymous" thing and there's a video floating around where she's trying to be intimidating and saying "We are legion. We do not forget". I'm sure @Jaimas might remember her now since the video got circulated a bit when she was blaming GG for getting fired. I believe she's removed it since then but there might be a mirror floating somewhere.
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Right, blame something else for your fuck ups, Crawley.
 
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Ass Manager 3000 said:
So, it looks like there's been a TRUE AND HONEST content leak-

View attachment 81166

Bellow is a template version of the above without the background, so you can continue Autgirl and Cockboy's adventures!

View attachment 81165
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this makes me want to download ren'py and make a parody game with HvB's assets

actually thats exactly what im going to do brb
 
I'm struggling to understand how someone could put this shit
91862e1b6e7b7c5c7d854ff6bdaf24b8_original.png
up on Kickstarter and feel good about it. Her backgrounds are obviously photos she either took or stole with a filter applied and her actual art is just pure garbage.

Other than her quality VN though, I don't really see how she stands out from the average self-centered autist pretending to make a difference by posting her hot opinions on Twitter
 
GeorgeDaMoose said:
up on Kickstarter and feel good about it. Her backgrounds are obviously photos she either took or stole with a filter applied and her actual art is just pure garbage.
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Its a 30 second photoshop trick. I know because I just did it myself.
 
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What blows my mind is: she took real pictures to be used as backgrounds and filterfucked them. Why not just use pictures of real people (her, her husband, and some friends playing the other parts) and filterfuck them and try to pass the entire thing off as "stylized" or something? Add some voice acting from the "actors", find some industrial music artist on Bandcamp or something that is willing to let their stuff get used "for exposure" and voila: you have a $1.99 "Mixed reviews" Steam game.

If she'd done that, it'd not only be easier but more importantly would also mean she wouldn't be reduced to begging for donations on Kic.... oh, wait. Never mind.
 
GeorgeDaMoose said:
I'm struggling to understand how someone could put this shit
91862e1b6e7b7c5c7d854ff6bdaf24b8_original.png
up on Kickstarter and feel good about it. Her backgrounds are obviously photos she either took or stole with a filter applied and her actual art is just pure garbage.

Other than her quality VN though, I don't really see how she stands out from the average self-centered autist pretending to make a difference by posting her hot opinions on Twitter
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In her Kickstarter info summary she explicitly states the backgrounds are supposed to be exactly what they look like. Something about familiar locations given a stylised twist.
 
her art looks like something from a Steward HK Lar Lover video
 
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Kimberly Crawley said:
  • Deploy BIOS malware to destroy Toronto Mistrust's Bay Street datacenter
  • Imitate a Toronto Mistrust board member with fingerprinting and email spoofing
  • Gather intel via illegal digital means to report the bank to the Securities Commission and Canada's top police force, the RCMP
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BIOS malware? Wat? Is she trying to describe a rootkit?

Kimberly Crawly said:
"We see a lot of visual novels in the crowdfunding scene. Many, if not most of them, are romantically-themed. That’s actually kind of strange, when you think about it, as developing a visual novel around a different theme, say, revenge, would automatically give your project an interesting hook.
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Oh, it's a visual novel. Of course it is. The only type of "game" with less interactivity than idle games and less substance than dating sims.

Kimberly Crawly said:
There's a successful ending for each of those three branches, three successful endings in total. Each branch also has two bad endings for performing the attacks incorrectly (six in total) and there's an additional three bad endings applicable to all routes for triggering Tankboy's PTSD too much, and for underfeeding or overfeeding Crowgirl respective to her anorexia. So although Tankboy and Crowgirl are brilliant hackers, you must navigate their mental illnesses succesfully!
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Wow, why should I be impressed by this? Multiple endings for a video game is an industry standard. It has been since the 90s. Even indie, 8-bit era style games like Undertale and LISA have multiple endings. Didn't Shadow the Hedgehog have like, fifteen endings? That was a decade ago.

This is beyond pathetic.

Kimberly Crawly said:
Most visual novels, including original English language visual novels, feature "anime/manga" style art. Hackers Versus Banksters features western comic strip style art. And like a western comic strip, the character designs are all directly based on my own hand drawings.
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You mean photos that you vomited up through an ugly photoshop filter & then drew on in MS Paint with the pencil tool. This is reminding me a lot of Plumbers Don't Wear Ties.

Kimberly Crawly said:
The game's script breaks the fourth wall so frequently, that fourth wall doesn't even stay up! Crowgirl and Tankboy know that they're stuck in a visual novel game, and you can see and feel their frustration.
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Ah yes, the Hipster's key to writing; meta-narratives. Brilliant.

Kimberly Crawley said:
So, this project, Hackers Versus Banksters,
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Okay, can we address that horrid title? Crawley, the word you're looking for is "Banker", you retarded mall-goth. When I read "Bankster" for the first time, your Kickstarter, my brain immediately assumed it meant "Bank robber" because using it to describe someone who works at a bank is butt-fuckingly retarded.

Kimberly Crawley said:
has taken a lot of time, effort, frustration, ambition, and courage.
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Your magnum opus is on par with Ghost Motel and that game was made in Flash in 2002. For further comparison, Ghost Motel was also a visual novel and it has had ten sequels by 2005.

You're a "hacker" & still struggling with the one.

Kimberly Crawley said:
Hackers Versus Banksters is made with the Ren'Py engine, which uses the PyGame framework and Python. Making this game has taught me a lot about Python. The code I've created includes some custom stuff I've figured out how to do in Python that's beyond the standard Ren'Py scripting, such as the code that keeps track of what Crowgirl has eaten and whether or not she should be hospitalized.
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Are you trying to imply that you learned the script from scratch? No wonder you're not done, only retards try doing it that way. It would literally go thrice as fast if you got the Python programming manual from O'Reilly. What an idiot.

Kimberly Crawley said:
For the past year, I've also been learning Java for Android development. I have several Android app projects that I've been working on, but nothing that I'm ready to show to the public yet, as I am with Hackers Versus Banksters.
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You've been a hacker since at least the 90's and you never learned fucking Java? What the fuck?

Kimberly Crawley said:
A number of people who have played the Hackers Versus Banksters demo have already given me very positive feedback. I've set a very modest goal for this Kickstarter, $1,000 when most successful Kickstarters for visual novels have raised over $5,000.
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You are literally the bargain bin of the bargain bin.

Kimberly Crawley said:
If I meet my very modest goals, it'll be the money and encouragement that I need to continue with my independent game dev. I have several ideas for other games, including more Ren'Py visual novels, and a few point-and-click adventure games (Double Fine style) that I can make in Game Maker.
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Most developers just getting their start have released games with five times the quality on Newgrounds for 1% of the cost at an eighth of the time it has taken you to make this crapheap.

Exhibit A.

Thousands of way better developers have released masterful games with no funding and little to no payment.

Get a fucking grip.

Kimberly Crawley said:
I appreciate all compliments, constructive criticism, and most of all, financial support of this Kickstarter. If you love helping the little guy, I'm about as much of a "little guy" as possible. I'm broke, and I'm a woman in a male dominated field.
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This might mean something if your salt were worth the words. This might mean something if you weren't making a visual novel, the gayest of all game genres in the fucking world that only requires five lines of script (no joke) to create.

You are so dim-a-dozen that it doesn't even begin to register on the radar.
 
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