🎨 Artcow Jiminycricketfan007 - Girl who's married to Jiminy Cricket

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Here's what Wikipedia has to say about the Cricket's reproduction habits:

Females (crickets) are generally attracted to males by their calls, though in non-stridulatory species, some other mechanism must be involved. After the pair have made antennal contact, there may be a courtship period during which the character of the call changes. The female mounts the male and a single spermatophore is transferred to the external genitalia of the female. Sperm flows from this into the female's oviduct over a period of a few minutes or up to an hour, depending on species. After copulation the female may remove or eat the spermatophore; males may attempt to prevent this with various ritualized behaviours. The female may mate on several occasions with different males.
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Crickets are hemimetabolic insects, whose life cycle consists of an egg stage, a larval or nymph stage that increasingly resembles the adult form as the nymph grows, and an adult stage. The egg hatches into a nymph about the size of a fruit fly. This passes through about ten larval stages, and with each successive moult it become more like an adult. After the final moult, the genitalia and wings are fully developed, but a period of maturation is needed before the cricket is ready to breed.
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needless to say, the fact she's attracted to a giant human cricket is not only disgusting, but their offspring (that was mind boggling to kiwi scientists everywhere) will be giant abominations of nature that are to be contained in the deepest depths of The Kiwi Farms
 
Judging from her deviantart update, she found this thread at most 2 hours and 42 minutes after it was posted.

She must Google herself constantly.
 
WhereHasEmilyGone on Wogglebugger: http://jiminycricketfan007.devianta...found-me-to-take-this-piss-546942486#comments
"She's just a strange, strange woman I found today. She had a fallout with one girl and apparently was hounding at her for YEARS afterward (from what I've read). Massively detached from reality too. Also banned Christians from reading her book, because she had a bad experience with one. Generally nasty lady."

And totally nothing strange and massively detached from reality about being married and having children to a fictitious cartoon cricket, along with his voice actor who was born a good 100 years before you yourself AT ALL!!! :)
 
How does someone get to a point in their life where they start acting like this? Did they just one day decide, "yeah, let's fantasize about an animated cricket".
 
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She has a rarely used furry account too. http://crystal-lunawolf97.deviantart.com/
 
So let me get this straight..... there's a woman who fetishizes a talking cartoon cricket from the 1930's voiced by some dead guy, and there's a thread on her?

Are we sure it's not just Cynthia Hansen again?
 
Isn't it kind of ironic that this woman wants to fuck somebody who's a conscience, and therefore knows what she's doing is wrong?
 
I think all lolcows don't seem to get the memo, so when @Derpygirl197 inevitably comes back to see if the thread is gone:

Don't.
Feed.
The.
Trolls.
Stupid.

Also, welcome to the Farms, you hypersensitive bugfucker.

IronJustice said:
Does she really deserve all of this attention? Shouldn't we save this for the toxic and rude cows who deserve it the most?
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No shit is too minor.

You're apparently here longer than I have. You should know this.

Surtur said:
Looks like she is going to have her brother hack us. We better watch out.
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Between her brother, Anonymous, and the FBI, we sure do have a shit ton of people that are gonna take us down based on having ties to some lolcow.
 
I'm actually a bit curious.

Derpy claims she's misunderstood (I know, a lolcow saying they're misunderstood, I'm shocked too).

My question is: What exactly is there to misunderstand about her being in love with a cricket?
 
Why Jiminy Cricket of all things? Dude is like the physical embodiment of a moral compass and conscience. Where's the appeal?
 
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