Opinion It's Time to Stop Celebrating Charisma - Jewess copes because women don't have charisma. Persuasion is just social construct.

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"Charisma" is often just narcissism in disguise.

Business sites like Inc.com are jam-packed with tips to become more charismatic, profiles of charismatic leaders, and excavations of their habits and tricks. The implied message is crystal clear -- charisma is a valuable tool to get ahead in business and life and you should do everything in your power to cultivate it.

That message is also wrong, according to a huge number of experts. Charisma, they argue, is often just narcissism in disguise, and while it dazzles in the short term it usually leads to destruction for both companies and individuals in the longer term.

The case against charisma​

What is charisma exactly? The dictionary tells us its "compelling charm that can inspire devotion in others." That sounds nice. The problem is what humans generally find charming. We're dazzled by confidence and self-assurance. The person who claims to have all the answers is generally the one most likely to end up in leadership.

This tendency to follow perceived strength may have made sense back when we were living in small groups huddled around fires terrified of toothed predators. But in our current complex, unpredictable world claiming to have all the answers is more often a sign of hubris than it is a signal someone can keep their followers safe from the lions at the door.

A fast-changing world requires the humility to know what you don't know, take others' ideas on board, admit when you were wrong, and change course. "Charisma" often gets in the way of all that. Which is probably why a mountain of data shows charismatic/narcissistic leaders lead to more risk and lawsuits but less integrity and team cohesion.

I'm summing up the case against charisma here, but it didn't originate with me. "Don't talk to me about charisma," INSEAD professor Manfred F. R. Kets de Vries recently wrote. "In reality, many people labeled as charismatic are also quite narcissistic, with an exaggerated sense of self-importance."

Columbia's Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic complained on HBR that "those in charge of judging leadership potential often mistake confidence for competence." While Stanford's Charles O'Reilly highlighted recent research on "grandiose narcissism," warning "these individuals have high self-esteem. They are much more agentic, more extroverted, and really more dangerous. And evidence shows that they're achieving high positions in organizations."

I could go on but I think you get the point. It's true that charisma often gets rewarded with promotions and pay raises. But the sad reality is this so-called charisma often amounts to little more than egotistical overconfidence and disregard for others that ends up hurting people in the end. If that's "charisma," do you really want to aim for it?

What to aim for instead.
Hopefully, you answered no to that question (if not, maybe re-examine your values). Which raises a couple of important and intertwined points. First, if charisma is a terrible goal, what's a better one? A host of research on everything from the social lives of teenagers to the methods of successful actors suggests focusing on serving others and improving their lives leads to a more enduring, less destructive type of likability and power.

For entrepreneurs who are in a position to elevate others to leadership positions, perhaps the more important question is, if you're trying to avoid being swayed by charisma, how should you evaluate leadership potential? Helpfully, there's a ton of advice out there. Much of it centers on screening less for people's ability to talk a good game and instead focusing on real world outcomes and the views of those who have already worked for a candidate.

But both research and star Wharton professor Adam Grant also suggest a simpler shortcut to sniffing out charismatic narcissists. People often project their own character on to others, so if you want to know if someone is an egotistical taker just ask them how many other people they think behave selfishly. If they offer a high percentage in response, consider that a major red flag that their exterior charisma is likely hiding a narcissistic interior.
 
The arrogance of these people is boundless isn't it. Every day they try to convince you that you need to strip away another piece of your human nature and dignity in the name of science, decency, anti-racism, and any other number of buzzwords that have been abused to the point of being nearly meaningless. I really have grown to fucking hate them.
I agree. I'd never thought I'd see this either, but those advocating for the human condition while underhandedly trying to use their advocacy as a stepping stone or platform for their own selfish needs is pretty fucking low. It's like they don't understand how varied life is for other kinds of people and they can just lump everyone into their agenda thinking "this will be best for everyone".

Life isn't fair, and it is unfair for a great most, but you deal with the cards you got and you realize what the cost is to make the grass green on the other sides. Anyone I've met in life who hasn't realized these things tend to be people who deserve to get what's coming to them.
 
These headlines have also gotten ridiculously easy to clock for that (((early life))) influence. Didn't even need to look at the author name to immediately know that it was written by a jew.

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Personally I find it hard to disagree with this idea, even if I'm certain the author is corrupt. The indisputable fact that some human beings have this nearly magic power to just sway the average person into liking them, through no tangible means or to no objective benefit, is immensely frustrating at best and downright horrifying at worst. Few things remind me of just how drone-like and empty people really are than seeing them buy into a con just because the conman has a strong force of personality.

Charisma is not a skill either. People say it is, but its observably not. I say this as a person who apparently has it, since in public situations I have a strange tendency to be eerily well-regarded by strangers or people whom I've had barely ten minutes of conversation with. With no effort at all. It can sometimes take a frightening amount of negative shit to come out of a person's mouth before you can get regular people to disagree too. The whole thing makes my skin crawl.
 
Charisma is not a skill either. People say it is, but its observably not. I say this as a person who apparently has it, since in public situations I have a strange tendency to be eerily well-regarded by strangers or people whom I've had barely ten minutes of conversation with. With no effort at all. It can sometimes take a frightening amount of negative shit to come out of a person's mouth before you can get regular people to disagree too. The whole thing makes my skin crawl.

I don't think charisma is a skill as much as some people haven't leveled up their intelligence stat enough to fight it off when it's all someone brings to the table.
 
I don't think charisma is a skill as much as some people haven't leveled up their intelligence stat enough to fight it off when it's all someone brings to the table.
I can agree with that. The ability to resist or at least question the ability of another person to compell you is probably the most important skill that most people never learn.
 
There's a lot of weasel words in this article about how many charismatic people are just narcissists in disguise. Yeah, dangerous people tend to be good at being liked, because it gets intended victims to drop their guard. But this article is straight paranoia.
YOU KNOW WHO ELSE HAD CHARISMA?

HITLER
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
 
They just don't like that a competent charismatic leader can accomplish more in a month than they can in their entire lives.

Plus.... (((early life))) it never fucking fails. For fuck's sake, stop making that paranoid dude ranting at the gas station right!
 
If charisma is bad, then perhaps we should promote and follow people based on merit?

Hah-hah! Sometimes I kill myself.
 
Charisma is not a skill either. People say it is, but its observably not. I say this as a person who apparently has it, since in public situations I have a strange tendency to be eerily well-regarded by strangers or people whom I've had barely ten minutes of conversation with. With no effort at all. It can sometimes take a frightening amount of negative shit to come out of a person's mouth before you can get regular people to disagree too. The whole thing makes my skin crawl.
Just because a skill comes naturally to people doesn't mean it's not a skill. People are thirsty as he'll to talk to someone who strikes that balance between "doesn't drone too long, says positive things and bothers to remember names and details". If it goes down to either that or having anal middle managers who bitch run my life then I know what I'll have more fun with.
 
I don’t think I’ve ever heard a leader called charismatic - meaning the kind of charisma that makes people want to follow them - who wasn’t a white male...except possibly Obama, whose charisma came from his whiteness, not his semi-blackness.

I have known other leaders who were not white males that I would personally say are charismatic as people, but singling out the quality and labeling it? Always white males.

This is really just agitating white males in leadership positions. There is something about charismatic white males that historically has led to large quantities of people wanting to follow them. It doesn’t seem to ever work that way for anyone else. Charisma might mean more people like you and respond well to your ideas simply because they like you and the way you phrase things, but it only seems to translate into large-scale “Imma follow this guy” when it’s a white guy. There is a difference between charisma that increases likability and that that increases the desire of others to follow you.

Now I have no military experience so it might be different there, but I still have seen a lot of ex-military in civilian/business leadership roles and still, “charismatic leader” only seemed to translate for white guys.
 
I don’t think I’ve ever heard a leader called charismatic - meaning the kind of charisma that makes people want to follow them - who wasn’t a white male...except possibly Obama, whose charisma came from his whiteness, not his semi-blackness.

I have known other leaders who were not white males that I would personally say are charismatic as people, but singling out the quality and labeling it? Always white males.

This is really just agitating white males in leadership positions. There is something about charismatic white males that historically has led to large quantities of people wanting to follow them. It doesn’t seem to ever work that way for anyone else. Charisma might mean more people like you and respond well to your ideas simply because they like you and the way you phrase things, but it only seems to translate into large-scale “Imma follow this guy” when it’s a white guy. There is a difference between charisma that increases likability and that that increases the desire of others to follow you.

Now I have no military experience so it might be different there, but I still have seen a lot of ex-military in civilian/business leadership roles and still, “charismatic leader” only seemed to translate for white guys.
Charisma can certainly be applied to black guys and white guys in the military.
I've had charismatic white guys, black guys and Hispanic guys in charge of me from my limited military experience
The big thing that comes to distinguish them really seems to be more for the types who become senior NCOs specifically. Officers are trained to be hands off managers who don't really give speeches so they don't give off that warlord vibe you typically see. It really seems to come down to being Gung ho and personable which most people don't really manage well and leadership classes don't seem able to teach.
 
Personally I find it hard to disagree with this idea, even if I'm certain the author is corrupt. The indisputable fact that some human beings have this nearly magic power to just sway the average person into liking them, through no tangible means or to no objective benefit, is immensely frustrating at best and downright horrifying at worst. Few things remind me of just how drone-like and empty people really are than seeing them buy into a con just because the conman has a strong force of personality.

Charisma is not a skill either. People say it is, but its observably not. I say this as a person who apparently has it, since in public situations I have a strange tendency to be eerily well-regarded by strangers or people whom I've had barely ten minutes of conversation with. With no effort at all. It can sometimes take a frightening amount of negative shit to come out of a person's mouth before you can get regular people to disagree too. The whole thing makes my skin crawl.
I definitely agree, but also not for the reasons the author is saying. She's just mad that she's a repulsive bridge troll and gets a 30% penalty at shops, even after taking her racial innate into account.

"Charisma" is what gives us cults of personality, celebrity worship, politician worship. Basically any time a human is deified, it's because of charisma. Why do you think they choose attractive people to deliver the news? They're telling you what to think, and they know that if you find the person saying it attractive you're more likely to believe it.

If you boil it down to its raw essence, charisma is just your monkey brain telling you to hang around people with good genes to increase the odds of mating with them so your children can have them too. It's no different than the bird with the brightest feathers or the ape with the reddest ass. "You are attractive and/or charming therefore I believe everything you say" is probably the single biggest flaw in human behavior and the reason for almost everything bad in society.
 
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