Is my dog gonna splode?

[OrionBalls]

He refuses to poop in the rain, and it's been three days. ETA- Mastiff bois are heavy, so I can't do that, but you win, anyway. Also, it stopped raining at 3am. He urgently (for him) woke me up to go take what I can only assume was a massive shit.

 

[Bargain Bin Laden]

I want to be behind him when he lets it all out.

 

[Magicicada_septendecula]

Even if he's the best house-trained dog in the world, I'd look around the house for things he might have left in some corner or place you don't go too much..

 

[Moosebonker]

My dog hates the rain. I carry her out to the woodshed so she has no choice but to walk back to the house and has a pee/poo on the way.

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

My baby mauler breaks the speed record for rain shits

 

[dick brain]

My baby mauler breaks the speed record for rain shits

This is a good sentence.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

I want to be behind him when he lets it all out.

You sure you want a massive mastiff shit on you? Mastiff turds are big enough to double as weapons.

 

[Betonhaus]

Lock him between your knees and knead his gut until he has no choice.