I’m going to be a tree, what now?

[Gorgar]

title

 

[BlueSpark]

Absorb nutrients, wick moisture

 

[Rozzy]

All the furries are gonna pee on you.

 

[OrionBalls]

I will feed you with the remains of deceased pets. Grow tall and strong so I can eventually make a corner cupboard from your corpse.

 

[Alligator Alcatraz]

You like to get peed on by men, furries, dogs, and shit on by birds constantly?

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

What kind of tree?

 

[Smug]

As a tree, you are effectively a bundle of sticks. A faggot, if you will. You're a giant faggot.

Well, maybe not giant, but that's okay - still a faggot.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

 

[beautiful person]

Trees are cool, but they can't protect themselves from being cut down. Bad position to be in.

 

[WhatIsThePunchline]

Don't become a tree.

 

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

Im going to become a lumberjack THAT’S WHAT, BITCH

 

[JethroTullamore]

I’m gonna pee on you.

 

[Botchy Galoop]

I'll pine fir yew.
The Larch.